BROTHERLY LOVE
By Sarah Wartman
PART TWENTY-SIX
I walked into JC’s guestroom and slammed the door. Abby made her way over to the bed and sat down. I paced the room, not saying a word.
“You okay?”
I looked over at her, tears forming in my eyes. “Do I look okay?”
She didn’t respond, just patted the spot next to her on the bed. I sat down next to her and placed my head on her shoulder.
“I hate myself,” I told her.
She looked down at me, removing a loose strand of blonde hair out of my face. “Why Belle?”
“For allowing myself to fall in love with him.”
“Allowing yourself?” she asked and then scoffed. “You make it sound like you had a choice.”
“Sure, I did. I could have stopped this.”
“Oh my dear,” she said softly. “You are so clueless.”
I pulled out my cell phone and dialed our apartment number. I needed to talk to Angela. It wasn’t that Abby wasn’t helping, cause she was, but I needed to talk to my best friend.
“Hello?” she asked after the third ring.
“Angela,” I muttered. “I’m sorry to bother you, I know Brian’s in town.”
“It’s no big deal, what’s wrong? JC do something?”
I layed back on the bed, my feet dangling off the side. “Yeah.”
“What did he do?”
“I should have never come. It just hurts so much to see him happy while my life is falling apart without him,” I told her, a single tear falling down my face.
“I know doll,” she started to say. But my attention diverted somewhere else. The door to the room swung open and there stood JC.
“There you two are,” he exclaimed, sauntering over towards us. And before I knew it, he was laying right on top of me. I looked over at Abby, whose mouth was on the floor in shock.
“Who ya talking to?” he slurred, his face inches from mine.
“Angela,” I told him.
He grabbed my cell phone from me and started talking to her. I couldn’t stop thinking about him laying on top of me. Talk about memories. My first instinct should have been to push him off of me, but I didn’t. Instead, I put my hands on his back, drawing little circles on it like I always did with my long nails.
“You be nice to her,” I heard Angela tell JC.
“I’m always nice to her,” he told Angela. “Belle’s my best friend.”
Tears formed in my eyes and I pushed JC off of me. “Give me my phone,” I demanded and JC did so. I said goodbye to Angela and looked up at JC.
Instantly, Laura came into the room and giggled. I stood up quickly and pushed past JC. “Abby and I are leaving, you coming?”
“I don’t want to! I’m having too much fun!” she said and started pouting.
“Suit yourself,” I told her and pushed past her.
“Okay, fine,” she said and sighed. “Let’s say goodbye to JC first,” she told us.
JC took turns hugging Laura and Abby and finally came up to me. After hugging me, he put both hands on my cheeks and tried to smile at me.
“You going to be okay?” he whispered, his face just inches from mine.
“Yes,” I whispered.
“You sure?”
“Yes,” I told him, annoyed.
“Would you call me if you weren’t?”
I studied his face for a moment. I felt like crying on his shoulder and punching him in the stomach all at the same time. My emotions were flying.
“Go to hell JC,” I said before storming out of his house.
PART TWENTY-SEVEN
A week later, I found myself backstage of our winter concert, pacing nervously. I was extremely confident with the song I was going to sing, I could nail every note perfectly. But I still couldn’t shake my nervousness. I didn’t know how my brother could sing in front of thousands of people with ease, while I got stomach aches and my hands shook like crazy just in front of a couple of hundred people.
I knew JC wouldn’t be out there in the audience. In a way, I wish he was going to be here. But after the way I blew him off last weekend, I’m sure he didn’t want a thing to do with me. And who could blame him?
I made my way out on stage and squinted as the bright white lights shown down on me. I closed my eyes and imagined the room was empty. The only thing I could see was JC standing along the back wall, smiling confidently. Imagining that gave me the strength to continue. I took a deep breath as the music started for my song ‘Against All Odds’ by Mariah Carey.
How can I just let you walk away,
Just let you leave without a trace?
When I’m standing here,
taking every breath with you.
You’re the only one who really knew me at all.
How can you just walk away from me,
When all I can do is watch you leave.
Cause we shared the laughter and the pain,
And even shared the tears.
You’re the only one who really knew me at all.
So take a look at me now,
Cause there’s just an empty space.
There’s nothing left here to remind me,
Just the memory of your face.
So take a look at me now,
There’s just an empty space.
And you coming back to me is against the odds,
And that’s what I’ve got to face.
I wish I could just make you turn around,
Turn around and see me cry.
There’s so much I need to say to you,
So many reasons why
You’re the only one who really knew me at all.
So take a look at me now,
Cause there’s just an empty space.
There’s nothing left here to remind me,
Just the memory of your face.
So take a look at me now,
See there’s just an empty space.
But to wait for you is all I can do,
And that’s what I got to face.
Take a good look at me now,
Cause I’ll still be standing here.
And you coming back to me is against all odds,
That’s the chance I’ve got to take.
Take a look at me now.
I opened my eyes and the audience roared in applause. I smiled at them and bowed. I looked back up and thought I saw JC slip out of the auditorium. ‘It’s just your overactive imagination’ my mind told me. Quickly, I shook those thoughts from my head and exited the stage.
“Belle!” Justin screamed and ran towards me. He picked me up and spun me and I layed my head on his shoulder. “That was unbelievable.”
“Thanks,” I told him, smiling, as he put me back down.
“I’ve never heard you sing so beautifully. It was like you were in another world,” he told me, smiling. I knew what he was thinking and I winked at him.
Lance and Joey were there too and they congratulated me also. Everyone I passed said something kind to me. Guess I did a lot better of a job than I had expected. I guess it was probably the truth in the words that made it so easy to sing it.
When Chris congratulated me, it was awkward. He didn’t say much, just hugged me and said I did a good job. He excused himself quickly and grabbed the other guys so they could leave. I couldn’t figure out his odd behavior, but I didn’t think much about it.
Later, I went and got my coat from the vocal room and was walking down the deserted hallway alone on my way out to the car. Most of the people that attended the concert were already gone. I had stayed longer to help clean up and was now on my way home. I was digging through my pockets to find my car keys when I felt someone grab me, his grip wrapped tightly around my arm. His other hand wrapped around my mouth, so I wouldn’t give him away. He quickly pulled me into a nearby classroom and kicked the door shut.
PART TWENTY-EIGHT
I tried to scream, to squirm free, but he was too strong for me. He pushed me into a corner, his hand still on my mouth. He was dressed in dark colors with a black baseball cap pulled down his face. I swung at him, trying to break free. But he suddenly ripped his cap off his head and looked at me.
“JC!” I screamed.
“Shhh!” he exclaimed, putting his finger up to his lips and leaned in towards me. “Don’t give me away.”
“What are you doing,” I exclaimed, pushing him away from me. “What is this?”
“I couldn’t keep myself away any longer,” he told me, looking deeply into my eyes.
I crossed my arms. “Excuse me?”
“That was a beautiful song,” he whispered, walking closer to me so that there was just inches in between us. “I’ve missed you so much.” JC leaned in and tried to kiss me and I moved away quickly.
“You can’t do this JC,” I told him, pacing in front of him. “You can’t, I have more respect for myself than to let you hurt me again.”
JC grabbed my hands so that I would quit pacing and have to look at him. “I know I was an idiot. I let things I couldn’t control get out of hand, but I assure you, I didn’t want us to break up. I love you more than anything, do you know how hard it has been for me?” he asked.
“Hard for you?” I exclaimed. “Don’t even go there. And what do you mean, things you couldn’t control? I don’t understand.”
JC shook his head. “That’s not important right now.”
“It is to me,” I assured him.
JC lifted my hands so he could kiss them and a tear rolled down my cheek. “I know I don’t deserve another chance. I don’t deserve you. But I had to try to get you back, you have to understand that."
I nodded. “I understand,” I whispered.
A small smile formed on his face and I couldn’t control the smile that spread on mine. I had dreamt some many times of us getting back together, that JC would hold me and tell me he loved me. It was almost too good to be true.
JC pulled me into an embrace and I rested my head on his chest. I wanted to stay in his arms forever, in this moment forever. I felt his hot breath on my neck and shivers ran up and down it. I pulled away from his embrace and quickly pulled his face down towards mine forcefully.
We pulled away from the kiss and looked into each other’s eyes. A few tears ran down my face and JC wiped them away.
“Why are you crying?” he whispered.
“Cause I’m happy you big idiot,” I told him, wiping my eyes dry.
“I do have a favor to ask of you,” he said, taking my hand and lacing his fingers in mine.
“We just get back together and you’re already asking for favors?” I asked him and smiled.
“I know it’ll seem like a never ending request. But this time, it’s more serious than you could ever understand….”
I studied his face, puzzlement in my eyes. “What is it Josh?” I whispered.
PART TWENTY-NINE
“You can’t tell anyone about us, about getting back together,” he told me.
“But JC….”
“No one Isabelle,” JC told me, more serious than I’d ever seen him. “Not even Justin. No one.”
“For how long?” I muttered.
“As long as it takes. You’re willing to do this, aren’t you Bella? Because I am.”
I looked deeply into his eyes, seeing his extreme sincerity. But at this moment, I would have done anything to make him happy, anything to keep me in his arms.
I nodded. “I won’t tell,” I whispered.
~*~*~*~
A couple weeks later I was home and watching a movie with my brother when my cell phone rang. I quickly got it out of my purse.
“Hello?”
“Hey Belle,” JC said softly.
“Oh, hey Justin, what’s up?” I asked, sinking down into the chair.
“Chris is there, isn’t he?”
“Yep,” I said and looked at him. Chris looked over at me and I smiled at him.
“Hey, can you meet me in the food court at the mall?” he asked me.
“Yeah sure, what time?”
“An hour?”
“Yeah, sounds good,” I told him and hung up.
Chris looked over at me with quizzical eyes. “What did Justin want?”
“We’re gonna go to the mall. He wants some new clothes or something and wants my opinion.”
“Oh, okay, have fun,” he told me. “When you going?”
“In an hour,” I answered, standing up and making my way to my room.
“Where you going?” Chris shouted from the living room. “The movies not over.”
“I have to get ready,” I shouted back.
Chris stood up and walked into the entryway. “What for? It’s just Justin.”
I stood there, looking at him, trying to think of something quick. “I know silly. But you never know, I could meet the man of my dreams at the mall and I don’t want to look like I just woke up.”
“Whatever you say Isabelle,” Chris said and made his way back to the sofa.
~*~*~*~
I pulled into a parking space a mile away from the mall. I got out and locked my car door, turning around just in time to bump into JC. He was decked out in baggy clothing, a baseball cap over his face and sunglasses.
“Hey gorgeous,” he said, kissing me quickly on the lips.
“Is that all I get?” I asked him.
“Maybe if you’re good, you’ll get more later.”
“Oh, I’ll be on my best behavior then,” I told him, dropping my keys into my purse.
“Chris suspect anything?”
“No, he thought I was going to the mall with Justin, clothes shopping or something.”
“Great,” he said and his smile disappeared when he saw my somber expression. “I know you hate lying to your brother. But it won’t be for too long, I promise.”
I sighed. “I know,” I told him. JC wrapped his arm around my shoulders and kissed my forehead. I sunk my head onto his shoulder and sighed.
Suddenly, JC stopped walking and I looked up at him. “What is it?” I asked.
“I forgot,” JC said, slipping his hand into his jacket pocket. “I have something for you.”
PART THIRTY
“Oh, what is it?” I exclaimed as JC dug in his pocket.
“Close your eyes and hold out your hand,” he instructed and I did as I was told. When I felt the cold hard plastic on my hand, I opened my eyes. I studied the blank c.d. case with a plain looking c.d. in it.
“What is it?” I asked him, looking up to see him smiling down at me.
“I guess you’ll just have to wait and see,” he told me.
“Oh no you don’t,” I told him, turning around and walking towards my car. “I wanna hear what’s on this.”
JC grabbed my waist and turned me around. “Not now,” he whispered in my ear and I giggled.
“Oh, all right,” I told him, slipping the case into my purse.
~*~*~*~
I slumped down into a chair right outside the JC Penny’s dressing rooms. JC was in there with a couple dozen shirts and pants, trying to decide what to add to his vast collection of clothing.
“Are you about done yet?” I yelled into the room with the numerous changing rooms.
“Nope,” he snapped. “Not even half way done.”
I sighed loudly, hoping he’d hear me. I dug into my purse and pulled out the c.d. again. My curiosity was running wild, what could it possibly be?
JC came out and modeled a pair of black pants with a jacket to match. “Yes or no?” he asked, spinning around like a diva.
“Stand still,” I instructed, standing up to take a good look at it. “It looks okay, I guess.”
JC quit dancing around and looked at me. “Okay you guess?”
I smiled. “It’s not fair to ask me what I think. I’m gonna have a biased opinion no matter what. You could come out here wearing a garbage bag and I still would think you were the sexiest man alive.”
JC grabbed me around the waist and pulled me towards him. “Oh, someone wants to get lucky tonight,” he whispered and kissed me on the neck.
I laughed loudly and pushed him away from me. “Go change you big gorilla,” I told him, pointing towards the dressing rooms.
“Yes ma’am,” he answered. I sat back down on the chairs and waited patiently.
“So, I hear Justin asked you to be his date for the Billboard Awards,” JC yelled from the dressing rooms.
I sighed. “Yeah, he did. I didn’t want to go, but Chris and mom and Johnny pretty much told me I didn’t have a choice. Looks like I’ll be there right along side you guys. As always.”
JC walked out of the dressing room wearing a pair of jeans a plaid button-up shirt. He leaned over and kissed me on the lips. “I wouldn’t want it any other way.”
“Yeah, but it’s gonna be hard to keep my eyes and hands away from you all night,” I told him, grinning.
JC kissed me lightly on the lips and went back to the dressing room. I sat back down in the chair and looked around. There weren’t many people at the mall, for which I was grateful.
But suddenly, my breath got caught in my throat. I watched as the familiar faces walked into JC Penny’s. I stood up quickly, not sure what I should do.
“JC,” I said as softly as I could, but loud enough for JC to hear me. “JC, Chris and Justin are here.”
TO BE CONTINUED