CAUTION: Those of you who do not have a sense of humor, we suggest you not read this. This is, after all, just for fun. So, if you take it seriously and are offended, get a life. And if you feel you need to send us hatemail, go for it! Consider yourself warned!
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1971 - In Pennsylvania, a baby boy with a high shriek is born. His name is Christopher.
1972 - Christopher tells his first dirty joke to the delight of his mommy.
1976 - In Maryland, a woman squeezes out a howling blue eyed boy named Joshua, who is quickly nicknamed JC for no apparent reason.
1977 - In Brooklyn, NY, an Italian nurse delivers an 11 lb. baby boy named Joseph.
1978 - Joseph mouths his first words..."Feed me."
1979 - In a serene country hospital, a quiet little boy with a shy demeanor enters the hostile world. His name is James, but Lance will do just fine.
1980 - Lance's first cuss word, resulting in his first spanking.
1981 - In a Memphis, TN hospital, a baby boy with lots of curls is born. Justin Randall spends his first night sucking on a platinum plated pacifier.
Christmas of 1982 - Justin receives his first car, a toy Mercedes Benz with working horn.
1984 - Lance calls his kindergarten teacher a wench.
1987 - Christopher gets his driver's license. He buys his first car with the money he made shoveling sheep dung in the hot sun.
1988 - Justin's mother, Lynn, realizes her son could make the family a lot of money. Justin is enrolled in voice lessons.
1989 - Christopher prepares to work his way through college, with dreams of becoming a psychologist and working a 9-5 job.
1990 - JC leaves normalcy behind for a new show called the "Mickey Mouse Club." He acts on the show and wears ridiculous outfits without protest.
1991 - Lance gets shoved into yet another locker at school.
1992 - Justin makes his debut on "Star Search." He loses to a girl. Mom is mad.
1993 - Justin makes up for his sorry loss by landing a role in the "Mickey Mouse Club" cast. He cannot act for crap, but his young Michael Jackson like voice makes the young ladies swoon.
1994 - JC and Justin are fired from the show.
1995 - Joey graduates from high school, a miraculous event in the Fatone family's eyes. (Yeah, it's mean, but laugh)
Later in 1995 - A college student, Chris, decides he wants to become rich. He contacts a friend a decade younger than himself and says, "Dude, let's form a band and get chicks." The dude, Justin, agrees.
October 22, 1995 - 'N Sync's first show at Pleasure Island a big success.
1996 - 'N Sync takes on Europe.
1997 - 'N Sync still in Europe. They wonder whether or not America will accept them. They change their looks in order to become more "American" looking.
1998 - 'N Sync comes out in America. They're cute, and the fact that they wrote "Giddy Up" does not matter to millions of adoring girls.
1999 - A busy year. 'N Sync enjoys a huge following, and they're on top of the world.
2000 - 'N Sync who? With the arrival of a new boy band, the Go Go Boys, 'N Sync is facing some mighty stiff competition.
2001 - 'N Sync's fourth album, "Y2K Was Cool," sells a mere 500 copies nationwide.
2002 - 'N Sync breaks up after a whole seven years.
2003 - Justin files for bankruptcy after his investments in Nike and Tommy Hilfiger are lost. He moves in with his mother, who invested all of her money in Innosense, and therefore is also broke.
2004 - Chris, now 33, is working the national scene as a stand-up comedian. He especially likes to make fun of his old clothing line, FuManSkeeto, which sold a mere 200 items in it's one year existance.
2005 - JC is the proud owner of a blues club. He gets married to Sheeba, an exotic dancer with "a great personality."
2006 - Justin is allowed to leave rehab. He's been clean for months.
2007 - Lance has disappeared off the scene. He has found God in the rolling hills of Montana, where he lives with his Mormon wife, Gladys, and their daughter, Periwinkle, born in 2005. They have a horse named Toby II.
2008 - Joey, who gained 150 lbs. following 'N Sync, then lost it, is now pedaling a new miracle weight loss product. His young daughter, Sync, is in the gifted program at school.
2009 - Chris marries in Las Vegas; divorce filed a week later.
2010 - Justin releases a solo album titled "Myself, Me, and I." Critics bash it, but old 'N Sync fans buy it up. He is scheduled to open for a new boy band called the Gaybo Boys.
2011 - Justin's album has sold 2 million copies worldwide. He celebrates by marrying a model.
2012 - Both JC and Justin file for divorce.
2013 - Lance becomes a minister.
2015 - Chris announces he will run for President.
2016 - Christopher Alan Kirkpatrick becomes President of the United States of America just months after his 45th birthday.
2017 - Things in country slowly going to hell.
2018 - Chris impeached and voted out of office.
2019 - Justin marries yet again, producing a son named Michael Jordan Hardaway. Marriage fails.
2020- 'N Sync reunites for a tour. Lance finds the group "sinful and unholy" and doesn't want to join. After being clubbed on the head and forced into a jet, he reluctantly agrees.
2021- The tour earns the group millions. The headlines read: "They may be old, bald, fat and wrinkled, but to their fans, they're still in sync."
2041- Chris dies after trying to juggle a piano and a Volkswagon. He is 70.
2046- After eating an Italian sausage and going to bed, Joey passes away at his lucky number, 69.
2052- Lance also passes in his sleep at 73 at his cult's compound.
2066- Justin dies during a routine face lift and hair buffing. He is 85.
2097- JC manages to hang on until his 120th birthday, for which he is inducted into the Oldest Boy Band Dude Hall of Fame. His last words are: "Well, at least all five of us will be 'N Sync again in that great music box in the sky. Well, maybe not Joey. Lord knows where he ended up!"