Please excuse the world for laughing out loud.

National Guard members in combat fatigues are being deployed in the United States to provide both unarmed and "armed" security at some of America's airports.

The "armed" soldiers usually carry only 9mm automatic pistols, woefully inadequate against submachine guns.

If uniforms alone could deter terrorists armed with assault weapons and grenades, it would be cheaper to use Boy and Girl Scouts. At least the Scouts would receive only merit badges, not scarce tax dollars.

Guard members are trained extensively in the use of issued automatic pistols and rifles as effective equalizers in armed combat. And they know how to be alert sentries.

Not only should all of them carry all of their weapons during airport duty, but the weapons should be loaded with full clips and rounds in their chambers.

Armed terrorists bent on breaching airport security checkpoints won't be deterred by combat fatigues, crewcuts and popguns alone. Unarmed and underarmed soldiers will provide only helpless targets.

At least allow the National Guard's unarmed airport personnel to carry knives, nail files or knitting needles confiscated from travelers. (7 OCTOBER 2001)

E-mail: higgens@aol.com