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Cram Them Where Sun Doesn't Shine

Lawyers may be the most despised opportunists, but paid petitioners rank right up there.

You know the breed: They accost shoppers entering and leaving a shopping center, inquire about their voter-registration status and then ask them to sign petitions to place initiative measures or propositions before the voters.

In the good old days, petitioners were volunteers seeking redresses of political grievances. They were unpaid and committed to causes. Their efforts reinforced democracy.

Most of today's petitioners, however, are paid finder fees for valid signatures of registered voters. They are mercenaries loyal only to paychecks, not to causes or to the exercise of constitutional rights. Their efforts simply reinforce financial influences on government.

Many ballots today are crammed with measures and propositions sponsored by special interests with bank accounts large enough to also flood broadcasting and publishing venues with self-serving messages prior to elections.

The next time a petitioner pushes a clipboard in your face, demand to see his pay stubs. Then tell him to cram them where the sun doesn't shine. (17 OCTOBER 99)


E-mail: higgens@aol.com