Ravaged by Mad Cowboy Disease, Texans have spawned American preemptive attacks on suspected villains.
Dubya, who served as the Lone Star State’s governor before becoming President, went on to launch Uncle Sam’s first preemptive strike—against Iraq, suspected of having a threatening arsenal of weapons of mass destruction.
Now Texas law-enforcement officers are making preemptive arrests of public bar patrons—suspected of having inebriated intentions to harm themselves or others.
Texas coppers aren’t waiting for drunks to stagger onto the sidewalk or climb into their vehicles. Even tipsy hotel guests are handcuffed before they can return to their rooms.
A spokeswoman for the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission said the crackdown was necessary to keep intoxicated persons from doing something “stupid.”
Yeah, like being in Texas in the first place. (23 APRIL 2006)
