Common sense returned to baby names in 2011.
According to the Social Security Administration, the most-traditional monicker of William is now the third most-popular boys' name in America.
And Jacob (No. 1), Michael (No. 6), Alexander (No. 8) and Daniel (No. 10) are holding their own against mindless hippy-dippy creations popular since the 1960s.
Imagine having to go through life as a Rocket, Phallus, Clap or Banjo. Yes, they do exist in remote communes everywhere.
Sadly, James hasn't hit the Given Name Hit Parade No. 1 spot since 1952.
And don't even ask about other long-time favorites such as Thomas, Anton, Benjamin, Carl, Charles, Nicholas, Ralph, Kenneth, Gary, Damon and John.
They're mostly still attached to old farts collecting or about to collect retirement benefits and urinating ten or more times a day.
And girls' names? Sophia is now No. 1. Remember Sophia Loren? Just ask any geezer. (20 MAY 2012)
