DISCLAIMER: The Young Riders is the creation of Ed Spielman, and the property of Ogiens/Kane productions in association with MGM/UA television. This Story is created for entertainment purposes only, no infringement intended. Not to be copied without permission from the author.
Lou didn’t quite know where to start, she had promised Buck that she would try to discourage Bernie’s feelings, but something told her that would not be an easy task. Truth be told, Lou wasn’t sure that she wanted to discourage her feelings. Knowing her own turbulent emotions, she knew what she felt for Kid and Jimmy, and at times those feelings confused her, but not for a moment would she ever think of Kid as anything other than her soul mate. Just seeing the look of longing on Bernie’s face she had a hunch that her feelings were just as deep as her own.
Watching as Bernie moved to sit on the edge of her bed, she followed her over and sat beside her waiting patiently for her to break the awkward silence that enshrouded them.
“I miss my mama” Bernie spoke softly her slight shoulders trembling as powerful racking sobs shook her tiny frame. Lou watched for a few moments unsure of what to do, then enfolded her in her arms, gently stroking her hair, feeling so much older than the distressed young girl, but knowing the sense of desolation and solitude she was currently feeling, she wanted to help her any way she could.
“I miss my mama too Bernie” she spoke gently to her waiting for her sobs to subside, listening to the huge gulping breaths Bernie was taking she couldn’t help but feel her pain.
“No you don’t understand, I miss her terribly but I’m so confused, I’ve never had these feelings before and I know my mama would help me to understand” she spoke her emerald eyes full brimming with unshed tears.
“Bernie, I know you don’t know me very well but I want you to know that if I can help you in any way at all, I will” Lou spoke feeling a kinship with Bernie, that she hadn’t felt with any girl her own age in a long time. Sure she and Emma had spent many hours just talking girl talk and Rachel was now the closest thing she had to a girlfriend in town, but Emma had always been like a mother to her and Rachel was, well, Rachel was the older sister she had never had. But now she and Bernie had forged the beginnings of a friendship that both girls hoped would last a long, long time.
“Can I ask you a question?’ Bernie pulled out of Lou’s embrace and moved so she was leaning against the end of the bed, her arms wrapped around her knees
“Sure” Lou answered, moving to sit cross-legged in front of Bernie, her elbows on her knees her chin on her hands.
“How do you know when you’re in love?” she asked, her voice almost too soft for Lou to hear.
Lou sat for a few moments, trying to put into words her own feelings. “I think it’s different for everybody Bernie, I can only tell you how I knew’ she looked into the hopeful eyes of her new friend, who nodded her head quietly.
“It seems like I have always loved Kid, when I look at him my heart fills with so much love I’m sure it will burst, sometimes he makes me so mad I could just scream, but I couldn’t imagine a life without him in it, when he rides out its all I can do not to beg him to stay here safe, but when he does the same thing to me it infuriates me but makes me feel special and cared for all at the same time. When he’s late back from a run, my mouth goes dry with fear for him until I see him and Katy ride back in, I see in my mind the things that could happen to him and the thought of having to spend one day without him terrifies me.’ Tears welled in her eyes as she tentatively voiced her own feelings to Bernie. “But I know that if I show the boys how much I worry about him, they will tease me the way they do Kid and I can’t let that happen. So in front of the boys I try not to show just how much I do love him.” She paused not sure how much more she should share with Bernie. They sat there in silence for a few minutes Bernie thinking carefully about what Lou had said to her.
“How do you know if you are ready to” she paused blushing furiously “well you know?” she finished softly embarrassed by her own question
“Jimmy calls it ‘Dancing’” Lou giggled at Jimmy’s description watching Bernie’s beet red cheeks “I don’t know Bernie, only you can know for sure yourself” she answered truthfully
“How did you know?” Bernie asked
“I knew a long time before we ‘danced’ that Kid and I were destined to be together’ Lou stopped her voice catching as she tried to explain to Bernie.
“When I was younger a man hurt me badly, but Kid has helped me get over that, sometimes without even knowing it. He is the only man I could imagine ‘dancing’ with, he is so tender, and loving and giving. His eyes truly are the windows to his soul, sometimes, what I see in them scares me, I can see how much he loves me and I’m frightened I’m going to hurt him, but when I’m in his arms I forget everything, he fills my entire world, all I can think of is giving him all that he gives me.’ Lou answered truthfully, when she looked up at Bernie her face shining with her love for the man she spoke about.
“When Buck kissed me, I felt like I had died and gone to heaven, I didn’t want his kiss to ever end. My legs were like jelly, my insides were all warm and liquid, I felt connected to him in a way that I have never felt to any person before. It is wrong to feel this way I know, because I miss my mama terribly, but even before he kissed me I knew couldn’t bear not to have him in my life and losing him would hurt me far more than losing Mama did. ’
Back to the last chapter
Back to Ridingtall
Back to Tall Tales
On to the next chapter
