- Name: Michael R. Tchou
- Parts Played: Photographer, the Man In Black (stationed at PDX)
- Nicknames: Charlie Tuna, Fred the Merciless, Corrupter of the Innocent, t-unit 109 (T109)
- Birthday: That Information is TOP SECRET
- Sign: Aquarius
- Hometown: Williamson, West Virginia
- Favorite Color: Black, Shades of grey
- Dream Car: Black volvo hearse
- Favorite A-Team Character: The what team?
- (Belly button) Innie / Outie / Other: Innie
- Favorite Deodorant: Chlorene from the hot tub
- Favorite Place to Eat Lunch: Particular bedroom I know about
- Theme Song: Last plane out
- Quote to Live By: Savor the moment
- Goals and Aspirations: Corrupt more people, live forever
- How You Got Into the Cabaret: Autumn Leslie re-wrote the by-laws to get me in
- Mentor: Rod Strange
- Favorite Hair-do: French braid
- Fondest Cabaret Moment: Whenever attractive (female) groupies hunt me down and molest me
- What do you do Outside of Rocky: Signal integrity work on digital logic
- Sanity Rating: Insane 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Completely sane: Clinical manic-depressive with sociopathic tendencies
- Names of Voices in your head: They say that I cannot tell you
