Final Dawn
A Jason and Robin Short Story

Jason Morgan sat back in the leather chair as he waited for
the pilot to land his private jet. His mind was racing and his heart
was pounding as he tried to control his thoughts and failed. She had
called. After seven years she had called. And after seven years he
had come when she had asked. No questions. No explanations. One
minute he is in Port Charles and the next he is on his way to Paris.
Seven long years. God they had been hard. He had hated
her at first. Hated her for exposing the truth, although deep inside
he knew that it needed exposing. But he had been hurt and betrayed
and he had lashed out. He had taken comfort in his hate, drawing it
around him like a shield when the nights got too cold and too lonely
even for him to handle. If he hated her, then he couldn’t miss her. It
had been that simple. That complicated. That screwed up.
Except that she had been right. The world had not come to
an end because the truth was known. It had tilted, it had shifted, it
had changed but it had not ended. Given the chance, AJ had
become a good father. As much as he would like to believe
otherwise, Jason couldn’t lie to himself, not about this. He didn’t
know why the fact had surprised him. No one would have predicted
that Jason would be a good father before Carly put Michael in his
hands. Maybe Michael had that effect on you. Or maybe there was
something about fatherhood that forced you to grow up. Whatever
the reason, Michael was happy with AJ. And safe. Safer than he
would have been growing up with Jason, surrounded by violence.
She had been right about that.
She had also been right about Carly. Once Carly had realized
that she couldn’t play one brother against the other to get what she
wanted, Carly had left town.
God. She had been right about so much.
And he never told her. In seven years he had never picked
up the phone and told her how sorry he was. She deserved to know
that. It was the least of what she deserved from him but he had
never been able to pick up the phone. He knew that he had killed
any love she had for him that last time he had seen her. He couldn’t
bear to look at her and see dislike or worse-nothing at all.
So he had buried himself in his work And tried to forgot
her. He sometimes fooled himself into believing that he had. That
delusion had been completely blown away by her phone call.
Three words after seven years and he came running.
He still loved her. He probably had never stopped.

The address she had given him was a large gray stone
building in a suburb of Paris. The sign on the door said AIDS
Hospice. She had done it, he smiled in pride, she had achieved her
goal of becoming a doctor and helping others.
He entered the building, pulling his coat around him to keep
the cold autumn air out. The inside was clearly a medical building,
with a large central reception area. He walked up to the front desk.
“Could you please tell me where I can find Robin Scorpio.
Dr. Robin Scorpio.”
The nurse looked down at her computer.
“Dr. Scorpio is in room 156. Down the hall to your left. It’s
a private room.”
Jason was startled. “I’m sorry. You must have
misunderstood me. Dr. Scorpio is not a patient here. She must be
on staff.”
The nurse double checked and then shook her head. “The
only Robin Scorpio we have is a patient. Admitted last month, final
stages of AIDS. Is she a friend of yours?”
Friend? Had he and Robin ever been merely friends? He
ignores the nurse’s question and makes his down the hallway.
AIDS. Full blown. Final stages. The words seemed to bang
around in his head until he couldn’t think. How come he had never
thought of this? Had never thought that her illness would progress?
Maybe because in his mind she was so full of life that he had never
thought of her as dying. Or maybe because for the last seven years
he had been trying rather desperately not to think of her at all. And
failing every step of the way.
He stopped outside her door. He couldn’t do this. He
couldn’t go in and say goodbye. Not for anything. Not and walk
away with his soul and sanity intact Yet how could he not?
He opened the door slowly.

Robin was tired. She had barely slept in the last week
except for the half sleep induced by the drugs they gave her to keep
the pain bearable. They never worked. The pain always seemed
stronger than the drugs.
She was dying. In truth she had been dying for almost the
last decade, she had just been too busy living to pay much attention.
Now the pain was so intense, the illness so bad, that she couldn’t
ignore it. Couldn’t fight it.
Please God let him come. Please God let him agree. Please
God help him to do this for me.
The door opened and she smiled.
“Jason.”

She looks like hell and heaven combined, he thinks as he
stares at her. The same spirit betrayed by the body. His eyes meet
hers and he knows that what was once between them is still
between them. That connection. That awareness.
“Robin,” He whispers the words like a priest giving
benediction as he drops to his knees besides her bed. He is at first
lost for words but then they come stumbling out in rapid fire. “I’m
sorry. God, I’m sorry. I should have called. I should have come to
see you. I should never have stayed away.”
Her eyes fill with tears. She has always forgiven him. She
always will. “It’s okay,” her whisper is barely audible. Breathing is
an effort. Talking is a pain. “It doesn’t matter. Not now.”
“Of course it matters.” He looks at her and knows that the
nurse’s words were correct. Last stages. The pain is so intense that
it threatens to overwhelm him. But he can’t give in to it now. He
won’t. He shuts it down. “I should have been here. I should have
....” His voice breaks down.
“You couldn’t have stopped this. No one can. You bought
me time. The protocol you convinced me on bought me years.
Allowed me to go to school. Become a doctor. Live a life. Jason
don’t be sorry.” The last is punctuated with a round of coughing
that racks her body and tears his soul.
He reaches for her hand and holds it, hating how cold and
frail it feels in his stronger one. “I love you Robin. You know that,
don’t you. Even when I hurt you the worst, I never stopped loving
you.”
Robin smiles again. She didn’t realize how badly she needed
to hear those words just one more time. She can feel the pain and
the drugs kick in again but she fights to keep her control. She needs
to finish this. To ask him. She meant to be more tactful. She meant
to explain it better. But she has no time.
“Jason, I need your help.”
“Anything, “ He whispers fervently. “Whatever you want.
Whatever you need.’
“I need,” she pauses and starts again. “I need the pain to
stop. I need to not hurt anymore. I need to not put my uncle Mac
or Felicia or the girls through this. I need you to help me die.” The
words hang in the air. Jason is not even sure she actually said them.
“Robin.” He begins but she puts a hand on his lips to stop
him.
“I’ve thought about this for a long time. Ever since the
doctor said my HIV had turned to AIDS. This is what I want. This
is what I need. I can’t ask Mac to help. My dying is driving him
crazy. It’s like he’s losing my father all over again. You are the only
one I trust. The only one who can help me.”
“I love you Robin. Don’t ask me to do this.”
“It’s because you love me that I’m asking.”
Jason closes his eyes. He wants to yell. To scream. To run
from this room and never come back. But he can’t. He won’t
disappoint her again. He won’t let her hurt or suffer or be in pain if
he can help it.
“When?”
“Tonight. I want to see Mac and my family one more time
this afternoon. But I’m ready.”
He nods. He needs to get out of here. “I have to go make
arrangements. I’ll be back tonight.” He turns to leave and stops.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” Her voice is the firmest its been since he walked in.
He wishes she had said no. He nods. “I love you.”
She nods and he leaves.
She closes her eyes and prays that she has done the right
thing.

He spent the day walking around Paris. It had taken just a
few phone calls before he had gotten the medication he needed. She
needed. He had made a phone call to her doctor at the clinic. The
doctor had confirmed what his gut told him and Robin already
knew. She had a few weeks. At the most. It was not going to be an
easy death. Not if he didn’t help her. Could he do this? Could he
not do this? The gray of the Paris afternoon gave him no answer.
He didn’t expect it to.

He returned to her room late in the evening. It had been a
simple matter to bribe the guard to let him in. The hallways were
dark and he moved down them silently.
He opened hers. The room was quiet except for the muffled
sound of her crying. He moved to the bed, and careful not to get in
the way of the machines she was hooked up to moved to cradle her
in his arms.
He could feel her bones.
“Robin?” He gently traced the line of her cheek, trying not
to notice how gaunt she looked.
“They just left. I love them so much. I want to see Maxie
finish college. Georgie drive a car. Mac and Felicia grow old
together. I want to be there to make sure that they are okay.”
His arms tighten around her. “They will be,” he promises.
“Your uncle is a strong man. I should know I’ve been butting my
head against his for years now. Felicia makes him stronger. The
girls are going to grow into beautiful and strong women just like
their cousin.”
Robin sighs. “If I was really strong I wouldn’t be asking you
to do this. I would be strong enough to handle dying alone.”
“You’ve done too much alone over these last few years. I
have too. Let me help you with this. Let me do this for you. As
long as you are sure?” He looks at her questioningly and she nods.
“Just hold me tonight. One last time.” Robin whispers as
Jason brings her closer into the fold of his embrace.
“I feel so peaceful when you are with me. Like nothing can
touch me. Or hurt me.” She says softly. “I am so lucky to have had
you in my life.”
Jason laughs incredously. “You can say that. After
everything.”
Robin looks at him. “Its because of everything that I can say
that. Loving you wasn’t always easy. But it was always worth it.
Always. I have no regrets.”
“I do,” Jason’s voice is shaky. “I’m sorry I hurt you. Sorry I
chose Michael over you. Sorry I let Carly get between us. Sorry
that it took me seven years to find you again. Sorry that I found
you too late.” The tears are falling unchecked and Jason doesn’t
care. He’s tired of pretending.
“Jason,” Robin searches for the right word to make him
understand. To let him know that she forgives him. To give him one
last final gift. “You did what you thought was right. I knew that.
You gave your heart to Michael. You gave him your loyalty. I
understood that. I always understood that. You didn’t stop loving
me. You just started loving Michael. He was a child. An innocent
baby that you were trying to protect.”
“He wasn’t my child. And you were right. AJ deserved to
know the truth. In the end I hurt you for nothing.”
“I forgive you. Is that what you need to hear? I forgive you
Jason Morgan. Yes you hurt me. I hurt you too. But for every hurt
you gave me such incredible joy. You made me live again after
Stone. You gave me back my dreams. I wish we would have had a
happy ever after. I really do. But I don’t regret what we had. I
wouldn’t change what we had. Not a second of it. You have to
know that. I forgive you Jason. Please forgive yourself.”
The room is silent except for Robin’s labored breathing and
Jason’s steady breathing.
“I want to die,” Robin whispers. “I want to die without pain. I
want to slip away and find peace. I’m ready to let go. Of this body.
Of regrets. Of everything. But I will never let go of your love. I
can’t do this unless I know that you will be okay. Jason” Her voice
is pleading between her tears. “Jason when this is over, promise me
that you will find someone else to love. Someone to love you.”
“Robin, I can’t imagine loving anyone but you.”
“That’s what I said when Stone died. But you taught me
that the heart heals and can love again. Somewhere out there is
someone who will teach you the same thing. Promise me that when
she finds you, you will let her.”
He doesn’t believe it. He knows it won’t happen. But he
can’t let her worry about him. So he tells her one lie. “I promise.”
“Thank you,” She whispers gratefully. Robin looks out the
window to the rising sun. The sky has already been beautifully
painted in layers of pink and orange and crimson. In a few hours the
city she has grown to love will be alive again. She won’t be. The
thought should make her said. It doesn’t. All it brings is this
incredible sense of peace. It’s been a good life. With Jason here to
hold her, it will be a good death.
Jason places two small pills in her hand and then closes his
hand over hers.
“It’s not too late to change your mind.”
She smiles. “This is what I want.”
He nods, grabs a cup of water, and helps her swallow the
pills. She almost chokes on them, but manages to keep them down.
“Hold me,” She whispers as her eyelids grow tired. “Love
me. I love you.”
“Not half as much as I love you,” Jason whispers brokenly
as he openly cries.
“It’s beautiful isn’t it,” She takes one last look out the
window. “My final dawn.”
“Beautiful,” Jason whispers looking down at her. He holds her as her form grows still.
Then he breaks down.

The end.

Author's Note:
This story was based on an incident that happened in my first fan fic
“Secrets, Lies, and Other Acts of Love.” The focus of that story
was Emily, so Jason’s final act of love for Robin was related briefly.
I’ve been thinking about it a lot and decided to explore it as a short
story.