Emily sits on the edge of the pier, dangling her now bare feet over the lake below. She smiles when she hears the soft sounds of music coming from nearby and closes her eyes when she hears footsteps from behind her.

He’s alive, she thinks to herself, he’s alive and the night is beautiful and suddenly it seems like anything is possible.

He slips in beside her and for a moment the silence between them speaks volumes.

Lucky looks up at the stars that shine like crystal in the dark as ink sky. “I’d almost forgotten what a night like tonight looks like. What the soft summer breeze feels like. For so long I dreamed of nothing but coming home and now ...........” He looks at Emily with his soul in his eyes. “Now I don’t know where home is.”

Emily gently reaches out to touch his cheek. “You’ll find it again. If there’s one thing I’ve learned is that having a home isn’t about a place, its about having people in your life who care about you. I thought I lost that when I lost you and then Jason and then...” Her voice lowers and she doesn’t finish her train of thought, but she doesn’t have too. They both know who she leaves unsaid. “But somehow along the way these last two years I created another life for myself to replace the one I lost. A life that at least gave me a direction to move in. I was doing okay, but I am so much better than that now that I know you are alive.”

Lucky smiles at her, enjoying for the moment the shining happiness in her large brown eyes. He has a feeling that the rest of them will not be as happy to see him tomorrow. They had all moved on with their lives. He should be happy for them. If he had really died, the last thing he would have wanted was for Liz to mourn him forever. Liz deserved happiness. She had found it with Nikolas. He sighs, maybe its for the best this way. Nikolas could give Liz the world in a way that he never could have even before the fire and the kidnapping. Nikolas would make Liz happy. After all that he had been through, Lucky didn’t even know how to be happy. Maybe it was time to let go of his first love. First loves weren’t always last loves, were they?.

Emily watches the play of emotions flickering across his face in silence. She aches for the pain he feels, but knows there is nothing she can do other than support him.

After a moment, Lucky reaches over and puts an arm around her shoulder.

“You have no idea how much I missed you Em.”

“Probably as much as I missed you Spencer.”

: “You still stunning the fashion world?”

Emily grins. “Nope. In fact I bet you will never guess where I spend my free time these days.”

“Candystriping at GH?”

“Oh, please. I leave that to the Sarah Webbers of this world.” Emily shakes her head and her long brown hair frames her face. Lucky finds himself gently caressing a strand of it with his fingers. “The Emily Quartermaines of this world spend their free time working at ELQ of course.”

Lucky whistles. “No way. You and ELQ? Next you’ll be telling me that you and Edward have become best buddies.”

Emily smiles and Lucky’s eyes widen. “Oh my God. Emily Quartermaine, businesswoman.”

“I had to grow up sometime.”

“Yeah but I wasn’t expecting that kind of change.”

“Why not? Things change all the time. This is Port Charles. You never know what’s going to happen next.”

Their eyes meet and hold and Lucky loses himself in the depth of hers. That same feeling of awareness of her that he felt at the gatehouse comes back in full force. He can name it now. Desire. Pure and simple.

Whatever spell he’s caught up in, she seems to be too. His voice is husky as he reaches over to caress her cheek and leans closer. “You never know...” he echoes her earlier words as he gently and unresistingly places his lips on hers and kisses her. After a moment she returns the kiss.

Something happens. There is no other word for it . Something. Something magical. Something promising. Something unexpected. Something that scares her. She gently pushes him away, smiling shakily as she avoids his eyes.

Making no mention of the kiss, she stands up and feels the unexpected heat of the summer night. She looks at the sparkling water in front of her and at the young man next to her, a dazed look still on his face. They need a distraction. Suddenly she smiles.

“Close your eyes,” she tells him.

“Why?” he asks even as he obliges her. She doesn’t reply and he hears instead the shuffling of clothing and a minute later a splash. He opens his eyes in shock to see a Emily in the lake laughing. “That water has to be freezing.”

“It’s summer. Of course its not freezing. Just very very cold.”

“There are fish in there.”

“Of course, but they are Quartermaine fish. They are very well trained.” She giggles. “But if you are too afraid of a little cold water.......”

“No suit.” Lucky says smugly. Lucky looks at the pile of clothing next to him and realizes for the first time that Emily is nearly naked in the water. The thought takes his breath away even as he wills it not to.

“I think you should come out.” He tells her.

“Then help me out.” She swims over to the dock and holds out her hand.

Lucky reaches out to pull her up when Emily surprises him by pulling him down into the water.

He surfaces with a sputter.

“Emily Quartermaine you will .....”

“Will what? You can’t make me pay if you can’t catch me.”

A glint enters Lucky’s eyes. He grins. “Never dare a Spencer.”

Twenty minutes later, Lucky helps a laughing Emily to the shore. He holds her hand to help steady her as she finds her land legs, when she trips, he reaches to catch her and his hands hold her waist. He is instantly aware of her nearly naked state. The bra and underwear she is wearing cling to her skin, revealing and concealing in a way that makes his own feelings race madly. His hands curve around her slender waist and it is all he can do to resist the temptation to pull her close. He notices the shivers racing through her.

“You’re cold,” Lucky says softly.

She wants to deny it. She wants to tell him the truth, that with his hands on her what she is feeling is as far from cold as she can get and the shivers running down her spine have nothing to do with the weather. Instead she nods, not trusting her voice.

“I’d offer you my shirt,” he teases. “but its wet. Let’s see if there aren’t some blankets we can use in the boathouse for towels.”

He grabs her clothes and together they head to the boathouse.

They are both wrapped in their own individual blanket and sitting on some old cushions about fifteen minutes later, their clothes laid out to dry. Even though they are in separate blankets, Lucky can feel the heat from Emily’s body as they sit next to each other. She has somehow found her way into the curve of his body and his hands haven’t stopped caressing her hair, her neck, the gentle slope of his shoulders.

Emily closes her eyes. She’s had these kinds of dreams so often, but in her dreams it’s always Nikolas who’s touching her, Nikolas who’s arms she is wrapped up in. Not Lucky. Not ever Lucky. But this feels.....it feels so right. So incredibly right. She’s walking on thin ice and she knows it. He’s had a major shock tonight. So has she. Tomorrow he has to go face the rest of the world. And she has no idea what her place in his world will be. Is he her friend? Is he just her friend? Is this feeling between them just born of this night and all that has happened? Or could it have been there all along only they weren’t paying attention? If she gives in to what she’s feeling what will happen next.

Lucky isn’t thinking at all. He’s just feeling. The texture of her hair. The softness of her skin. The desire that is consuming him. Every time he touches her the thoughts that have plagued him all evening get pushed further and further away. There is no Nikolas. No Elizabeth. No Stefan. No Laura. No prison. No memories. Nothing. Just this moment. Just this woman. Just this touch. Just this.

He leans over and nibbles her ear and groans when she gives a slight moan. He turns her over and leans her back against the cushions and shifts himself so that he is leaning over her. He searches her face for something- fear? condemnation? some kind of sign that he should stop? He finds nothing but desire, a desire that kindles his own even further.

He leans forward and kisses her, this kiss a deeper and more punishing kiss that forces her to open her mouth and gasp as their tongues meet. It is the first part of their bodies to ever explore each other like that and the sensations it causes in both of them are overwhelming.

Lucky pulls back, his heart beating erratically, his breathing rapid and shallow. “Is this what you want?” He whispers, half hoping she will say no, half praying that she will say yes. He waits for her reply in frozen silence.

“Yes,” Comes the reply a few seconds later. “Yes.” She confirms again.

Their eyes meet and hold a minute, before Lucky lowers himself to her and proceeds to give her what they know their bodies crave but what neither suspects their souls need.

The cool air on her naked skin wakes Emily a few hours later. She opens her eyes cautiously, sure for a moment that the previous night was a dream and that she was back in her bed at the gatehouse waiting for the alarm to go off a second or a third time.

When she opens her eyes and sees the morning light breaking through the boards of the boathouse, she knows that last night was all too real.

She sits up gingerly and looks around her. No evidence of Lucky being anywhere in the vicinity.

The only real evidence that he had been there at all was the small tell tale stain of blood on the sheets.

Oh God, she had let Lucky Spencer take her virginity last night. How could she have been so stupid? Lucky didn’t love her. He loved Liz. He had always loved Liz. So what if Liz had broken his heart last night? So what if Liz had found love with Nikolas? Lucky Spencer would always love Liz. Even if he didn’t, there was no way that he could ever care about her like that. All last night had proven was that he desired her. Living with Alan and Monica as parents had taught her that there was a vast gulf between love and desire.

Besides, she didn’t love Lucky. She didn’t. Last night had been about a million other things but it hadn’t been about love. Lust. Desire. Revenge. Loneliness. Need. But not love. Never love.

Emily closed her eyes as images of the night before replayed in her head. It had been like being caught up in a tornado, fast and hard and ferocious. There had been nothing gentle about his loving. If she was honest she would admit to herself that she hadn’t wanted there to be. She had wanted to lose herself in him as badly as he had wanted to lose herself in her.

It had hurt. She could remember crying out at his penetration. She could remember the pain that drove all thoughts of pleasure away. He had said nothing, just stilled in her and waited for the pain to evaporate. There was nothing to say. Nothing at all.

She shivered in the morning chill. She had probably disappointed him. It was probably why he taken off without waiting for her to wake up. She shouldn’t be surprised. She shouldn’t be hurt. But she was.

Last night she had been ecstatic to find her best friend was alive. How could that feeling evaporate so fast? What was it she was feeling this morning?

She dressed quickly. She has to find Lucky. Whether he wants to or not, they have to talk.

He is a complete and utter coward, Lucky thinks to himself as he waits in the woods outside of Nikalos’s cottage.

He should never have left her like that. Without a word. Without a note. But he couldn’t stay and face her. He couldn’t handle looking into her face and realizing what he had done. What he had taken from her?

He had used his best friend for sex. Not because he was in love with her. Not because he was likely to fall in love with her. But because he had needed her in order to forget for a little while the fact that the person he did love was in love with someone else.

He had used Emily. If he closed his eyes he could still hear her cries, feel her pain, see the blood. He could live with that. The problem was that if he closed her eyes he could see other things too, the lines of her body, the warmth of her touch, the incredible feel of his naked skin next to hers.

It may have been just sex but it had set him on fire. Even now when he was getting ready to confront Elizabeth and make himself known to the girl he considered his soulmate, he couldn’t get his mind off Emily. Off last night. He didn’t love her. He could never love her. Lucky had spent the last three years believing that he would love only one person his whole life. Elizabeth Webber. He still believed that. In a strange way, he needed to believe that. Needed to know that he was capable of loving someone like that. The fact that Liz may no longer love him back, didn’t alter what he felt. Couldn’t be allowed to alter what he felt.

He sees Nikolas leave but he still can’t work up the nerve to knock on the door. After a moment he realizes he doesn’t have too as Liz comes out with a canvas and easel and paints and begins to set up in the yard. He realizes as his eyes devour her that his instincts last night were right. She is happy. It radiates from her. He closes his mind to the hurt and steps forward.

“Elizabeth.” He says the words softly, not wanting to scare her. She looks up and a look of pure shock enters her brilliant eyes.

“Lucky?”

“Yeah. It’s me.”

“Oh my God. Lucky you’re alive!” She flies into his arms and for a long moment he lets himself hold her and luxuriate in the feeling of having her in his arms against. After a while, she pulls away and looks up at him.

“I can’t believe this. Where? How?”

He smiles. “The details don’t matter. I’m back. That’s all that matters.”

“Of course,” she nods. “Have you seen your mother? Or Lulu? Or Nikolas? They must be thrilled.”

“I wanted to see you first.” He says softly. “I’ve been dreaming about this moment for two years. Seeing you again. Holding you again. You are all that kept me sane.”

Liz lowers her eyes, suddenly painfully aware of the situation she is in. “Lucky, there’s something I need to tell you.”

“You mean about the fact that you are engaged to my brother?” God, he didn’t mean to sound so bitter. He really didn’t.

She gasps. “How did you know?”

“I went to Luke’s last night.”

“You ...you should have let us know you were there.”

“I would have but it looked like a family celebration. One tight knit cozy Cassadine family dinner.”

“Lucky I....”

“No forget it. I didn’t come here to start a fight. I came to be with the girl I promised to spend my life with. I came to find you so that we could start our life together. Two years later than we planned, but I don’t care. I still love you Liz. I will always love you.”

If it was possible, Liz grew paler. “It’s been two years Lucky. I thought you were dead. We all thought you were dead. I almost went crazy with the pain of losing you.”

“But now I’m back. Now we can be together .”

“It isn’t that simple. I’m not the same person I was two years ago. I can’t pretend that everything that happened to me didn’t happen.”

“You mean Nikolas.”

“Yes Nikolas. He saved me Lucky. I thought I would die without you, but Nikolas showed me that I was stronger than I thought I was. He became my best friend. Then he became someone I loved. And before I knew what had happened, I was in love with him.”

“I was that easy to replace?” This time he doesn’t bother to keep the bitterness from his tone.

“No dammit you weren’t. I didn’t replace you with Nikolas. The two of you are so different I don’t see how I could if I had wanted to. There’s a part of me that will always love you. Always. When we were together my love for you filled my life. But I lost you and the only way I could live with that loss was to put my love for you into a small corner of my heart and let the rest of my heart learn to love again. I love Nikolas. I can’t pretend that I don’t. I promised to marry him last night.”

“And what about us? What about our pledge to each other? What about the vows we said in that church? Did you ever mean a word of it?”

“I meant every word of it. Every word. But things change. People move on. I don’t mean to hurt you. I never meant to hurt you. But if I just pretend that everything between us can go back to being the same, than I will hurt all three of us very badly.”

“I want you back. I know that I can make you love me again.”

“You don’t have to make me. I told you a part of me will always be in love with you. Maybe if there had never been a Nikolas, we could pick up where we left off. But there is a Nikolas. And as much as I may love you, I love him too. I won’t hurt him.”

“But hurting me is okay?”

“Don’t. This is isn’t my fault or your fault or Nikolas’s fault. Blaming someone is not going to make it better. I know it hurts, but someday you’ll realize that I’m right. What we felt was so intense and so much a part of our youth that it was bound to change and alter. If I had never had to go through losing you, I think we would have grown and changed together. But it didn’t happen. I found a love with Nikolas that fits me, who I am today, and makes me happy. Someday you’ll find the same thing. Someday you’ll find someone who makes you happy.’

Lucky shook his head. “Never. I will never love anyone else but you. Every other girl will just be a substitute for you.”

“I hope you’re wrong.”

“I know I’m not. I will only love one person in my life. You..” Lucky says bleakly. “How could I love anyone else after having loved you?”

There is a complete and utter silence between the two.

“What will you do now?” Liz asks.

“Go see my mother. And Lu. After that, who the hell knows and who the hell cares.” Lucky says defiantly. He turns to go and then stops.

“If he hurts you...”

“He won’t. He loves me.”

Lucky closes his eyes for a moment, nods, then turns and walks away.

Emily stands unnoticed by either Liz or Lucky, her head pounding and her heart aching. His words echo in her head like the rattling of machine gun fire after a cease fire is called.

“I will never love anyone else but you.”

“Every other girl is just substitute for you”

“How could I love anyone else after loving you?”

Why is the death of a dream that never got a chance to be born so damned painful? She wipes furiously away at the tears she tries to hold in.

She came looking for answers. Now she had them. Now there was really only one thing left for her to do. One place where she could turn to.

Lucky doesn’t go to Wyndemere that day. Or at least he thinks he doesn’t. The entire day is lost in a chaotic fog that he barely remembers. He thinks he walked along the docks. He can remember sitting in Kelly’s. He even has a vague impression of walking the halls of the high school. Anyplace where he can find something that proves that he and Liz were together once.

That evening he finds himself knocking on Emily’s door at the Gatehouse. He needs to talk to her. He needs to explain about last night. To apologize for hurting her. He needs to tell her that she will always be his best friend.

And if he is honest with himself he will admit that he also needs to see her again. To see if those same feelings that were so strong last night can still be found in the light of the day. Not that he has a clue what he will do if they are.

He knocks on the Gatehouse door impatiently and smiles when it begins to open. The smile falls when it is Reginald who stands before him.

“Lucky? Lucky Spencer?”

“Yeah, it’s me. I know- the whole back from the dead thing. I’d love to explain it to you but I really need to see Emily.”

“She isn’t here.”

“No problem. I can wait.” “No, I mean she really isn’t here. She flew out this morning to London to assist Edward with some business in Europe.”

“Oh....how long will she be gone?” Lucky is disappointed to think that he will have to wait, but a day or two or even three isn’t that long.

“She’s not coming back. Edward offered her a permanent position with ELQ Europe and she took it. As of noon today, Emily Quartermaine is no longer a resident of Port Charles.”

A stunned, silent, shocked, and suddenly lost Lucky Spencer makes his way quietly off the Quartermaine Estate.
London

A tired and exhausted Emily places her bags on the hotel room bed. She’s put an ocean between herself and Lucky Spencer with her grandfather’s help. It was hard to convince him without telling him the whole truth. She had promised him that she would come back to Port Charles someday.

She had lied. As long as Lucky was in Port Charles, Emily had no intention of ever setting foot in the city again. If Lucky left, maybe she would go home. If her grandfather needed her.

If she had her way, then she and Lucky would never cross paths again. Not for any reason. It was the way things had to be. The only way they could be.

She had no idea that she and Lucky would meet again and under circumstances that neither could imagine on that summer night.