Hip Hip Horay
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Mitch Benn's Crimes Against Music
Topic: Stephen Says
Elisabeth has once again reminded me why I love & married her and sorted out those theiving turd-monkeys over at Dell. It looks like, at long last, they're going to give us back our 381.88 pounds. I'm aware that we probably haven't really blogged about the whole Dell stupidity but it's been so infuriating and soul destroying that, up until this minute I haven't been able to deal with the issue in public without spazzing out. Big time.

I doubt I'll be at the bookstore much longer either; I've received my background check that has confirmed that I have no prior of pending criminal convictions and that I am not a threat to at-risk adults. So the good news is that I'll be starting my 'real' job soon. The bad news is that my street cred is ruined.

So with that in mind, I'll tell a story or three:

"I'm looking for a book. I don't know it's title or it's author but it's about bees."
"Is it a children's book?"
"No."
"Is it fiction? Natural history?"
"I don't know. Look, it's been featured on the television. It's been written about in the papers!"
"If you can tell me which papers or channels, I can look it up."
"Well how should I know which one's!"

Or how about this one?

"I'm looking for a map and I won't order one. I need to see it before I buy it. It's a map of Egypt. More specifically, Alexandria. ... Well?"

Or how about this one? (Granted, it's a blast from the past but I must obey The Rule of Three.)

"You HAVE to sell posters of horse anatomy! You sell books about horses, after all!"