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Flavour of the Week

Week of August 11^th

For those of you who haven't been included in the Flavour of the Week Mailing, this is especially for you, dammit and you will like it. So spoke the Great Celestrial WeeSaul.

Yes, I know that this here Flave is somewhat larger than others, but I do have a very good reason, K? I did ask for a topic to be discussed and only received one, so y'all are just going to have to live with the fact that you didn't send me a topic of discussion for me to discuss in the discussion portion of this here thingie...

The Question of the Week goes to a gentleman whom we shall just refer to as Mr. EvilePants and is as follows:

"I would like to hear you thoughts on the the Origins of the Thirty Years War -- Political or Religious?"

The 30 Years War in a Nutshell...

The 30 Years War lasted, um, 30 years which was convenient since is was named thusly. The war was ran officially from 1618 to 1648, but the roots of the war can be traced back to the Peace of Augsburg in 1555 when Lutheranism (those naughty followers of Martin Luther) was official recognized by the Holy Roman Empire and the Lutherns were allowed to keep certain lands that had been previously held by the Catholic Church. The peace itself was a big mistake, giving no framework for the future. So time rolled along and many Germanic rulers became Calvinists (them radically naughty followers of John Calvin) which the Peace didn't cover at all. So all these Protestants kept taking Catholic lands which was a good thingie from a Protestant viewpoint. The two sides felt the need to form teams of armed combatants; the Catholic League and the Protestant Union. Meanwhile in Bohemia, there was much drinking of coffee, reading of poetry, daddy-o, dancing merrily in the streets and some other revolting developments. The Bohemian's revolters suffered a crushing defeat at the hands of the Catholic League. Score this 1-nil in favour of the Catholics. The Protestant Union struck back with some new players on offense but were utterly defeated again by the Catholic League. Score this 2-nil in favour of the Catholics. The French, English and Dutch decided to form their own team to take on these upstarts and with Christian IV of Demark as their captain where thoroughly and utter defeated by the Catholic League. Score this 3-nil in favour of the Catholics. With this third (three is the magic number, ya know) victory, the Peace of Augsburg was declared to be null and void which didn't make the Protestants who had the land which was at one time Catholic none too happy. Another round of recruiting for the Protestant Union with the Swedes coming on board and Gustavus Adolphus as the captain. The Catholic League picked Albrecht von Wallenstein as their captain. The game was fought to a draw but Gustavus received a red card and ejected from the game while Albrecht was removed from the team by management because they feared that he would soon want to be a manager. In over-time the Catholic League put the Spaniards in who being fresh off the bench and kicked butt. Score this 4-nil in favour of the Catholic League. After this stunning defeat in over-time, most of the Protestant Union quit the game and in a deal with the managers of the Catholic League, received most of the land they had taken but was taken from them. But like they always say, "It ain't over 'til the fat lady sings." The French (who may or may not have been singing fat ladies) didn't want any part of this, so they called the Spanish out. The Swedes weren't too happy 'bout things either so both proceeded to kick Imperial butt all over Central Europe. Score this Protestant Union 5-4 in sudden-death. The Swedes received a big cash grand prize and some land. The French received options on a chunk of realestate. The Catholic League no longer had recruiting rites in Germany and left German politics for the most part. Lands that the Protestants had in 1624, the Protestants were awarded. A second place award of allowing Bohemia and Austria to re-impose Catholicism was given to the Catholic League. And dat's the fact, Jack, or it's as good as my feeble brain will allow me to remember the subject...

Next question, please...

BTW I do so enjoy my PDA that I use as a portable typewriter that I use to type lots and LOTS o' stuff...

ORGANIZATIONAL BEHAVIORIST OF THE WEEK:

Hey, hey, hey, just wait a second, pardner...
Me organized?
Must be some kinda joke...

CD OF THE WEEK:

"Follow the Leader" by Korn
I just like saying Korn...
Korn, Korn, Korn...
KKKKKKKKoooooooooorrrrrrrrnnnnnnn...
So much so that I'll do it again...
KKKKKKKKoooooooooorrrrrrrrnnnnnnn...