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You better not heat
You better not react
I'm telling you now
The Chemistry Teacher's coming to town.
He's checking it twice
He's gonna find out
The heat of melting ice
The Chemistry Teacher's coming to town.
He sees you when you're decanting
He knows when you titrate
He knows when you are safe or not
So wear goggles for goodness sake.
And drink your filtrate
You better not be careless and spill your precipitate.
The Chemistry Teacher's coming to town.
2. I'm Dreaming of a White Precipitate
Where the colors are vivid and the chemist is livid to see impurities in the snow.
May your equations be balanced and right and may all your reactions be bright.
3. Silent Labs
All with math, all with graphs
Observations of colors and smells
Calculations and graph curves like bells
Memories of tests that have passed
All with math, all with graphs
Lots of equations that need balancing
Gas pressure problems that make my head ring
Santa Chlorine's on his way
Oh--Please Santa bring me an 'A'.
4. Deck the Labs
Use your funnel and your filter Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Don we now our goggles and aprons Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Before we go to our lab stations Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Mix solutions for reactions Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Watch we now for observations Fa la la la la, la la la la.
So we can collect our data Fa la la la la, la la la la.
5. Test Tubes Bubbling
(to the tune of Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire)
Strong smells nipping at your nose.
Tiny molecules with their atoms all aglow
Will find it hard to be inert tonight.
He's loaded lots of little electrons on his sleigh
And every student's slide rule is on the sly
To see if the teacher really can multiply.
To chemistry students in this room
Although it's been said many times, many ways
Merry molecules to you.
6. Chemistry Wonderland
In your test tube, silver glistens
A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight Walking in a chemistry wonderland.
Here to stay, is the density
A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight Walking in a chemistry wonderland.
In the beaker we will make lead carbonate
and decide if what's left is nitrate
My partner asks "Do we measure it in moles or grams?"
and I'll say, "Does it matter in the end?"
Later on, as we calculate
the amount, of our nitrate
We'll face unafraid, the precipitates that we made walking in a chemistry wonderland.
7. We Three Students of Chemistry Are
taking tests that we think are hard
Stoichiometry, volumes and densities
worrying all the time.
room of fright
Room of thermites
blinding light:
With your energies
please don't burn us
Help us get our labs all right.
8. Iron the Red Atom Molecule
(to the tune of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer)
But do you recall the most famous element of all?
And if you ever saw him You'd enjoy his magnetic glow
All of the other molecules used to laugh and call him Ferrum
They never let poor Iron join in any reaction games.
Iron with your orbital so bright won't you catalyze the reaction tonight?
Iron the red atom molecule you'll go down in Chemistry!
9. Lab Reports
(to the tune of Jingle Bells)
Taking all those tests and laughing at them all
Bells for fire drills ring making spirits bright
What fun it is to laugh and sing a chemistry song tonight.
Oh what fun it is to study for a chemistry test today, Hey!
Oh what fun it is to take a chemistry test and pass.
10. The Twelve Days of Chemistry
On the first day of chemistry, my teacher gave to me,
A candle from chem study.
(second day) Two ceramic pads
(third day) Three little beakers
(fourth day) Four work sheets
(fifth day) Five golden moles
(sixth day) Six flaming tests tubes
(seventh day) Seven unknown samples
(eighth day) Eight homework problems
(ninth day) Nine grams of salt
(tenth day) A ten page test
(eleventh day) Eleven molecules
(twelfth day) A twelve point quiz
11. We Wish You a Happy Halogen
We wish you a happy halogen,
We wish you a happy halogen,
We wish you a happy halogen,
To react with a metal.
Good acid we bring, to you and your base.
We wish you a merry molecule and a happy halogen.
12. Oh Come All Ye Gases
Oh, come all ye gases; Diatomic wonders
Oh, come ye, oh come ye; Calls Avogadro
Oh, come ye in moles; 6 x 10 to the 23rd
Oh, molar mass and molecules,
Oh, volume, pressure, and temperature,
Oh, molar volume of gases at STP.
