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The Strike Anywhere Story

Chapters:

Jason being kicked out of his house for importing illegal mexicans into glenside was walking down the street in the worst part of Ambler, ohh scary, that is where on the corner of the street he met Seth, Seth is most likely a man but was selling himself using drum sticks as fake nipples, he saw the drum sticks and asked if Seth could play, Seth replied "what"? and Pete who was Seth's pimp started yellin hey it will cost you extra Seth is one of my best umm.. girls, and so Jason let the pimp in too there was this kid John on the other side of the street but, he has nothing to do with with Strike Anwhere so nevermind, Josh on the other hand was killing a little rabit and over heard them. He killed them all. And started a band with another Pete Jason and Seth and formed the Strike Anywhere. So the Strike Anywhere then played a show and never practiced again. Until one day josh quit cause dan beat him up and stuff. Then John the kid who had absolutely no relevence stole the Strike Anywhere's funds and financial resources. The Skaffers were forced to lynch him on a sunny day in January... Anyway Strike Anywhere became a traveling circus and played door to door on an endless (and pointless) tour of the nation. Seth hurt his toe and died. Pete is currently a French goatee model and living quite comfortably. John is still dead. Josh is still eating ruffage and fluffy animals. Jason disappeared in the Western Antilles and was never seen again though rumors are circulating that he is the admirable, i mean abomminable snowman. Danny starred in a feature role in Honey I turned the kids into Sub-Atomic Particles IV (trademark). And Jared... Well let's leave that story until another time children. His life is too painful to share about without some Haggan Dazz and a box of tissues.

In the making of this story many small and fluffy animals gave their lives to serve Josh's seven stomachs. John really is dead because he did not pay Jason the $60 that was owed to him. And Jared...Man that's rough it just ain't right... THE END

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