The universe is always nudging us with gentle signals. When we ignore the signals, it nudges us with a sledge hammer. Growth is most painful when we resist it.
Life goes like this. He get hit by little pebbles - as a kind of warning. When we ignore the pebbles, we get his by a brick. Ignore the brick and we get wiped out by a boulder.
Your life is a perfect reflection of your beliefs. When you change your deepest beliefs about the world, your life changes accordingly.
When people argue for their limitations they often say: "I can't do 'X' because it's lust the way I AM." More likely the truth is: "It's just the way I THINK I AM."
I'ts possible to put lots of energy into something, yet it seems like nothing is happening. Actually, your energy is producing change from the start, but you just can't see it. It's like heating ice to boiling water.
All of the above from "Follow Your Heart" by Andrew Matthews.
This is your awakening.
You realise that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change or for
happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to
terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that
in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter)
and that any guarantee "happily ever after" must begin with you and in the process a
sense of serenity is born of acceptance.
You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always
love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are...and that's OKAY. (They are
entitled to their own views and (opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving
and championing yourself and in the process a sense of new-found confidence is born
of self-approval.
You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or
didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the
unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what
they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always
about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the
process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.
You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and
to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process a sense of
peace and contentment is born of forgiveness. You realise that much of the way you
view yourself, and the world around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions
that have been ingratiated into your psyche. And you begin to sift through all the crap
you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look and how much
you should weigh, what you should wear and where you should shop and what you
should drive, how and where you should live and what you should do for a living, and
who you should sleep with, who you should marry and what you should expect of a
marriage, the importance of having and raising children or what you owe your
parents. You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you
begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for. You
learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the
doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with
and in the process you learn to go with your instincts.
You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and glory
in creating and contributing and you stop manoeuvring through life merely as
"consumer" looking for your next fix. You learn that principles such as honesty and
integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by gone era but the mortar that holds
together the foundation upon which you must build a life.
You learn that you don't know everything; it's not your job to save the world and that
you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility
and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say “NO”. You learn that
the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the
stake.
Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to love, how much
to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. You learn not to project
your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more
beautiful, more intelligent, more loveable or important because of the man on your
arm or the child that bears your name. You learn to look at relationships as they really
are and not as you would have them to be. You stop trying to control people,
situations and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with
love...you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms...just to
make you happy.
And, you learn that alone doesn't mean lonely. And you look in the mirror and come
to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop
trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonising over how you "stack
up". You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things
over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly
okay...and that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things you want. You
learn that sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You come to the realisation
that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you
won't settle for less. And, you only allow the one who cherishes you to glorify you
with his touch...and in the process you internalise the meaning of self-respect.
And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and
treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and
taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can
create doubt and fear. So you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body,
laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play. You learn, that
for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve and that much of life
truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth
working for and that wishing for something to happen is different from working
toward making it happen.
More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction,
discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and it's
okay to ask for help. You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great
robber baron of all time...FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your
fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it, and to give into fear
is to give away the right to live on your terms. And you learn to fight for your life
and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.
You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve
and that some times bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these
occasions you learn not to personalise things. You learn that God isn't punishing you
or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. And you learn to deal with
evil in its most primal stage - the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger,
envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life
out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you
are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take
comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of
people upon earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a
soft warm bed...a long hot shower.
Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make
yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your
heart's desire. And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to
the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open
to every wonderful possibility. Finally, with courage in your heart you take a stand,
you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best you
can. This is where the peace you have been looking for suddenly begins to appear and
your life DOES change!
They agreed that it was.
So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the
jar, shaking it lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas
between the rocks. He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was. The students laughed.
The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of
course, the sand filled up everything else. "Now," said the professor, "I
want you to recognise that this is your life. The rocks are the important things -
your family, your partner, your health, your children - things that if
everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be
full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your
car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff. If you put the sand into
the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes
for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you
will never have room for the things that are truly important to you."
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with
your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out
dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a
dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first - the things
that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."
I quite like Nem's jar idea. The trick is sorting the rocks from the sand and visa versa. I know many people that seem to fret about everything, rocks, pebbles and sand. As a result they live a life constantly in fear and walking the knife edge of existance.
I don't live that way. I like to think I'm very stable. I used to be a junkie to many things that I've slowly been letting go of. In particular one notable person. Coffee. Ciggarettes. Regret.
I want to live my life _so_ much. It's an adventure. It has its ups and its downs. Tradgedy, comedy, love, hate, enritching and degrading.
The trick is to look at the rocks. Rocks are strong. They last.
Even though a geologist would say otherwise that is also something to think about.
Things change. Change is good. If there wasn't change the land most of us are standing on would still be under the ocean being nibbled on by fishes.
There is nothing to fear because no matter what one thing still remains.
You.
All the above quotes are copyrite by their individual authors. Any duplication or copying of the above text without expressed permission is a criminal act.
By all means read and learn but stars save you if you copy it.
