Weltsville (AP)- Chapelsnap millionaire sod farmer, real estate mogul and filmmaker Martin Iambic was attacked by a group of dispondent residents of the Weltsville suburb of Joyville, claiming Iambic's strip mining of their front yards makes the neighborhood less attractive. Tensions came to ahead earlier today when ten tottlers stepped off of the Weltsville elementary school bus and fell 800 feet to their death. Iambic, scouting locations for his new project "PANTSQUAKE", the unofficial sequel to the acclaimed film/play "Sex With Horses", is reported to have suffered severe injuries to his foot.Always the joker, Iambic shouted to the press while be carried away on a strecher, "Now it can truly be said that there's no mud in Joyville"
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