Dictionary of Dating
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 ATTRACTION    : the act of associating horniness with a particular
   person.

 LOVE AT FIRST 
 SIGHT       : what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely
   choosy people meet.

 DATING       : the process of spending enormous amounts of money,
   time and energy to get better acquainted with a person
   whom you don't especially like in the present and will
   learn to like a lot less in the future.

 BIRTH CONTROL : avoiding pregnancy through such tactics as swallowing
   special pills, inserting a diaphragm, using a condom,
   and dating repulsive men.

 EASY       : a term used to describe a woman who had the sexual morals
   of a man.

 EYE CONTACT   : a method utilized by one person to indicate that they
   are interested in another.  Despite being advised to do
   so, many men have difficulty looking a woman directly in
   the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness, but usually due
   to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her
   chest.

 FRIEND       : a person in your acquaintance who has some flaw which
   makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.

 INDIFFERENCE  : a woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by
   the man to be "playing hard to get".

 INTERESTING   : a word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do
   all the talking.

 IRRITATING
 HABIT       : what the endearing little qualities that initially
   attract two people to each other turn into after a few
   months together.

 LAW OF
 RELATIVITY    : how attractive a given person appears to be is directly
   proportionate to how unattractive your date is.

 NYMPHOMANIAC  : a man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more
   often than he does.

 SOBER       : condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in
   love.