If Men Got Pregnant...


     Maternity leave would last for two years...with full pay. 

     There'd be a cure for stretch marks 

     Natural childbirth would become obsolete 

     Morning sickness would rank as the nation's number one health 
       problem 

     All methods of birth control would be improved 100 percent 
       effectiveness 

     Children would be kept in the hospital until they were toilet 
       trained 

     Men would be EAGER to talk about commitment 

     They wouldn't think twins were quite so cute 

     Fathers would demand thaqt their SONS be home from dates by 
       10:00pm 

     Men could use THEIR briefcases as diaper bags 

     They'd have to stop saying,"I'm afraid I'll drop him." 

     Paternity suits would be a line of clothes 

     They'd stay in bed for the entire nine months 

     Menus at most restaurants would list ice cream and pickles as an 
       entree