Okay, the lyrics are *phenomenal* But damned if I had a devil of a time getting an idea out. *G* I wavered between a bunch then I rewatched Legacy and well..got an idea. *G*
I'd hardly call it rivetting reading but...it doesn't totally suck *G*

Tanks Shomeret for the excellent Lyrics!!!

disclaimer: I own Shaun but I do not own Rebecca or Amanda nor do I own Highlander or its concepts of Immortality. *G* (If I did some of the HL movies never would have seen the light of day *G*)

Anyway, on with the fic. You'll find the lyrics at the end of the story.

The Sharing of Fears
by M. Edison
------------------

Paris, France
May 10, 1994
Rebecca’s Grave

Standing over the grave, the petite Immortal felt her throat constrict with unshed tears. She hadn’t believed it when Amanda had come to her home in Dublin to tell her about Rebecca. It had seemed impossible - no way Rebecca Horne could possibly be dead. Of all of them, she’d been the one Shaun had thought to actually have a shot at winning the Game.

‘There can be only one, Shaun.’ Rebecca’s soft voice intruded into her memory and Shaun lifted her head, dark eyes shining with tears. ‘None of us can escape the fact that we must fight...it is our destiny.’

“I know.” She answered aloud. “But it wasn’t supposed to be you that lost.”

The whispery sensation of another Immortal skittered across Shaun’s awareness and she turned, looking warily for the newcomer. Yes they were on Holy Ground but nevertheless, she wanted to be careful. She knew Amanda had intended to go after Luther, it was why she was in Paris, but she didn’t know if Amanda would win. So, if Luther had won - Shaun fully intended to go after him. And, if this was him, she wanted to be ready.

Fortunately, it was Amanda who appeared at the end of the row and walked up to greet her. “Shaun...” Smiling wanly, the older Immortal moved forward to hug her student. “You came after all...”

The Irish Immortal’s smile echoed that of her teacher. “Couldn’t stay away...had to say goodbye. Even if she can’t hear me.”

Hooking an arm with Shaun’s, Amanda led them away from Rebecca’s grave. “Maybe she can.”

“I would like to think so.”

They fell silent then, both lost in their memories of the Immortal woman who’d had such a large impact on their lives.

Finally, Shaun voiced the question that had been swirling in her mind. “What about Luther?”

“He’s dead.” Amanda responded with more than a little satisfaction in her voice. “Duncan killed him three days ago.”

“MacLeod?” the younger Immortal clarified with a raised eyebrow. “As in Connor’s student?”

“Yeah, I stayed with him after I told him and he found out who’d killed Rebecca and then he went after him.” At the suspicious look from Shaun, Amanda laughed ruefully. “All right, I went after Luther first. Duncan came after us and lured Luther away. He’d guessed I’d try it and planned ahead.”

“I’m glad Luther’s dead....” Shaun smiled over at her friend. “and that you’re still in one piece. After all, if you died who’d I get to play thief with when I get the itch?”

“I still don’t know why you’re doing this Security consultant thing...” Amanda groused, grateful for the lightened conversation. “Its not nearly as much fun.”

“Oh yes it is.” her former partner-in-crime countered immediately. “and the best part is I get paid *and* the police don’t try to put me in prison.”

“Well, that is a benefit...” The professional thief allowed with a small nod. “But still, I miss our little schemes.”

“One of these days we’ll commit a nice felony just for the fun of it, how’s that?”

Looking at her student, the elder Immortal laughed and shook her head. “Can you imagine what Rebecca would say if she heard you say that?”

Shaun’s eyes crinkled in suppressed laughter. “Probably something to the effect of what she always said - Amanda, you’re supposed to teach Shaun to be clever *and* honest, like I tried to teach you.’ Which, of course, is the part you always managed to conveniently forget.”

“Well she can’t say I didn’t teach you a trade...and besides, she took care of the teaching you to be honest. Rebecca always was much better at that than I - but then, she was better at a lot of things.”

****
England
December 20, 1405
Abbey of St. Anne

Shaun O’Hara couldn’t sleep, her dreams wouldn’t let her. Instead the young Irishwoman was wandering around the Abbey, eyes wide as she looked at the possessions of Amanda’s teacher, Rebecca. She’d never seen *anything* like it in her young life.

Rebecca was a real live Lady - not just some woman dressed up pretending to be one or some woman who’d married a rich old man to gain his fortune. No, Rebecca was a Lady through and through. Shaun hadn’t seen many in her life but she knew enough to know that Rebecca was the genuine article.

That, still unfamiliar, sensation of another Immortal’s approach skittered through her mind and Shaun jumped in fright - looking around another door, trying to find a way out.

“Shaun?” Rebecca’s cultured and warm voice halted her frantic search and Shaun spun to see the older, redheaded, Immortal standing in the doorway with a candelabra in her hand. “What are you doing up?”

“I wasn’t pickin’ or anythin’,” the Irishwoman rushed to explain, worried about what she would think. Some people didn’t like having other people, much less a commoner, touching their things. “I was just lookin’ at the pictures.”

Smiling, Rebecca moved to set the candelabra on a small table and walked over to look up at the painting then down at the young Immortal. “That’s fine...I don’t mind you touching anything.” She chuckled. “Sometimes I can’t help but reach out and touch them myself, in the right light they seem like magic.”

Concern lighting her eyes, the elder Immortal rested a hand on Shaun’s shoulder. “You seem troubled Shaun...can I help?”

Sighing, the young woman turned to look out the nearest window at the night sky. “It’s nothing too important - just bad dreams.”

“Talking about them sometimes helps...” Rebecca offered, stepping closer. She knew Amanda’s student was awed by the surroundings in which she lived. Amanda herself had been intimidated by them for the first little while she’d been with Rebecca. “I promise I won’t tell anyone - not even Amanda.”

The dark-haired Immortal looked back at the older woman with a hesitant look in her eyes. Nevertheless, she began to speak.

“I’ve been dreaming about the Quickening.” She confessed quietly. “I saw Amanda take one just outside London - I’d never seen *anything* like that before...T’be honest, it scared me.”

She sighed, pacing a few steps away. “Tis always the same dream, I'm never on my own, but there's nobody in sight - noone save the body a few feet away. I can’t see who I’ve killed but the Quickening’s just beginning - trying to reach me, I want to move, to run, but I can't turn to the left or right and its steady coming toward me, creeping across the ground like phantom fingers.” Shaun shivered violently and returned to the window, looking out at the starry night.

“I'm too scared to run and I'm too weak to fight it...” She dropped her head, resting her hands on the cold stone of the windowsill. “I don't know why I'm afraid of the lightning...but I am. It terrifies me.”

The admission made, the young Immortal’s head seemed to droop a little more. It didn’t take much observation for Rebecca to realize that Shaun’s confession of her fears to an Immortal, of the status she perceived Rebecca to be, was quite a blow to her Irish pride, as it were.

“Scared me too.” The older woman confessed with a rueful smile, moving forward to rest her hands on the sill as well. “The Quickening is an intense thing to witness - I was afraid I’d lose myself in it. My teacher told me that the Quickening has some of who the other Immortal was within it. Almost a piece of his or her soul...and that terrified me. I thought that killing another of my kind meant I’d either be possessed by this dead Immortal or eventually, I wouldn’t be me anymore. I’d be made up of pieces of them.”

Surprised, Shaun looked up at her. “You too?” After the words were out of mouth, she flushed slightly and looked down before continuing. “I didn’t know how to tell Amanda...She’s the best friend I ever had but somehow, its just not something I want to tell her. “

“Understandable.” Rebecca smiled. “There are some things I’m sure she doesn’t want to tell me. Its best to have more than one friend...that way you don’t overload someone else’s shoulders.”

Shaun nodded. “And there are some things you can tell some people, that you couldn’t tell others.” She sighed and paced away a few steps again. “How did you...”

“Get past the fear of the Quickening?” Rebecca finished for her with a smile. “Well, I told my Teacher my fear, just as you’ve told me, and he told me that while the Quickening does have an element of that dead Immortal in it, its not enough to overwhelm me. That my own soul is too strong to let that happen. And that, in time, I’d learn to deal with them better. And I have.”

Resting a hand on her young friend’s, Rebecca smiled. “There can be only one Shaun, none of us can escape the fact we must fight...it is our destiny.”

Paris, France
May 10, 1994
The Graveyard

“She was right too.” Shaun smiled with a small shrug. “It did get easier.”

Amanda’s smile was sad and fond at the same time. “Rebecca always did have a talent for allaying fears. She did the same for me - when I was afraid of facing the Quickening.”

The same expression of surprise that had crossed Shaun’s face nearly six centuries before, found its way to her face again. “You never told me you were afraid of the Quickening.”

“Not just the Quickening...” Amanda corrected as they reached their cars. “I was afraid of life as an Immortal, of fighting, of dying. First time I was challenged, I ran right back to Rebecca - hoping she’d hide me.”

“What did she do?”

“What you’d expect.” The elder Immortal woman smiled again, resting a hand on her car’s hood. “Asked me would I run and hide for the rest of my Immortal life, told me to choose the ground, choose my weapon, and face what was to come.”

“Which you did.” Shaun put forward with a smile. “Obviously.”

“Yes, obviously.” Amanda laughed. “I was shaking so badly I could barely hold my sword in my hands but I did. And once we began to fight, all that Rebecca had taught me came into my mind and I found myself winning. My first Quickening...I curled up in a ball and shivered until it hit. I must have looked like a rag doll being flung about by an angry dog - but I survived it.”

“I don’t remember much about mine.” Shaun confessed with a quiet voice. “Just that there was so much light, and it felt as if someone was tearing me apart and remaking me all in the same moment. Then it was over and then you were there...Helping me up, talking to me, taking me back to the house and running a wet cloth over my face. I felt like I was a little girl again and my mother was wetting my face like when I’d catch a fever - like I was safe.”

Her dark eyes decidedly teary, Amanda moved to hug her student. “Rebecca did the same for me. She told me that taking a student was almost like having a child of my own. That for some, I’d care as much about them as I could about my own child. When I found you, I remembered all that and I was terrified.” She chuckled. “We both know I’m not exactly good with responsibility.”

Her student laughed lightly but shook her head. “When it all comes down to it, you come through.”

Brushing a hand down Shaun’s longer hair, Amanda continued. “I almost left you behind - the idea of having a student...scared me to death but,”

“Rebecca.” the shorter woman put forward with a sad smile.

“Rebecca.” Amanda agreed. “I remembered what she’d told me about having a student, that it could be one of the most rewarding things I could ever experience, that the friendships I’d make could be with me forever, and I had to say.”

“I’m glad you did.” Shaun responded quietly. “It wasn’t the most orthodox of training but it was definitely what I needed. Besides,” She bumped her hip against Amanda’s and grinned. “You definitely taught me a trade, Rebecca may not have approved but I have to admit, its kinda fun to be at thief sometimes.”

Laughing, Amanda nodded. “Rebecca taught me, and you, to be creative but she also taught us to be honest...”

“But we forget that part.” The two women chorused as one.

They might forget to be honest but neither Amanda nor Shaun would forget the woman who’d had such a profound impact on their lives.

Physically, Rebecca was gone but her memory, as long as they lived, was still very much alive.

Paris, France
May 10, 1410
Empty lot

Lowering the sword, Shaun O’Hara dropped to her knees and clutched the hilt in her shaking hands as she went limp. Her first head...

And her first Quickening. Even now the energy was snaking its way across the ground toward her.

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph...” She whispered in fear as the mist covered her knees and moved up her body. Her own words to Rebecca came back to her lips and Shaun shivered. “Too scared to run and too tired to fight...”

As the lightening overwhelmed her and the young Immortal screamed out in agonized ecstasy, Rebecca’s words came back to her, “There can be only one Shaun, none of us can escape the fact we must fight...it is our destiny.”

Those words were echoing in her mind as the world exploded into swirls of colour and sensation and Shaun O’Hara tasted the Quickening.


Finis

Psychobabble

Tell you 'bout a dream that I have every night
Tell you 'bout a dream that I have every night
It ain't kodachrome and it isn't black and white.
Take me for a fool if you feel that's right.
Well, I'm never on my own, but there's nobody in sight.
I don't know why I'm afraid of the lightning
Trying to reach me
I can't turn to the left or right
I'm too scared to run and I'm too weak to fight
But I don't care it's all psychobabble rap to me

Tell you 'bout a dream that I have every night
It's in dolby stereo, but I still can't hear it right.
Take me for a fool. Well, that's all right.
Well, I see the way, but there isn't any light
I don't know why I'm afraid of the lightning
Trying to reach me.
Help me to find out what I don't want to know.
You're taking me there, but I don't wanna go.
I don't care. It's all psychobabble rap to me.

Psychobabble. All psychobabble.
Psychobabble. All psychobabble.

You're lighting a scene that's faded to black.
I threw it away cause I don't want it back
But I don't care it's all psychobabble rap.

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