“Hey,” Brian says looking at JC the next morning as he walks in for breakfast, “Is he ok?”
“Which one?” JC says.
“How about both?”
JC sighs, “I dunno…they’ve been through a lot though. Nick seems ok. Justin though, I’m worried about him.”
Brian nods, “This is gonna sound like a really stupid question, but do you think he will be ok?”
JC nods calmly, “I think so, but I think I am basing that on more from the part of my brain that knows Justin Timberlake. I don’t think I’m basing that on logic.”
“I understand,” Brian says, “They leaving then?”
JC stares at Brian and blinks for a second.
“I figured they would be tonight. I guess Nick isn’t telling us again huh?” Brian says pouring himself a cup of coffee carefully, “I figured he wouldn’t. Classic Nick if you ask me just run away from the problem. We were all discussing this last night when you were up with him and Justin.”
JC stares at Brian for a second and takes a step backwards bumping into the counter. Was that a bit of hostility he heard in his voice?
“He did it before he’ll do it again,” Brian says before taking another sip of his coffee.
“Brian…I…I want you guys to know I’m not trying to push you all away from Nick honestly. He just asked me to stay there because I knew Justin well enough too I guess.”
Brian waves off the comment calmly, “No…No we don’t think that…I just, we just didn’t exactly like it you know. We want Nick to be able to trust us and…”
“Maybe you guys should just…kind of back off though,” JC says, “I am trying to say that in the nicest way possible too.”
Brian stares at him coffee mug half raised to his mouth, “Come again?”
“I think…I think a lot of Nick’s pressure comes from the feeling of worry he has for you guys. That was one thing he kept saying to me. He didn’t like you guys to do that…or delay his thoughts or ideas. He wants to do what he wants to do without you guys worrying over every little thing. I think him running away the first time was out of necessity and out of a sheer power drive. I think you guys just need to let him go this time…”
“Just let him go? We just let him go the first time!” Brian yells, “I won’t let that happen again…do you know what that feels like no knowing if he’s dead or alive for tat period of time.”
“But you know now,” JC says calmly, “Brian…you need to all let him go. He’ll make it. He may be a little off and in need of some therapy, but he’ll make it regardless…Fuck, Brian, he’s already stronger then Justin…”
“No, no, no, no…”
“Maybe you should stop being selfish,” a soft voice comes from the hallway as a lanky figure walks into the kitchen and over to the fridge opening it up and pulling out a small bottle of juice, “Maybe you should think about what he wants first and not you all,” Justin says staring at Brian softly, “If Nick wants to go…he’ll go. If I wanna go…I’ll go. No one is our keeper. Stop treating us like burdens and children you need to watch over all of the sudden,” he says staring at Brian, “just because you didn’t do it when we needed it,” Justin says calmly before turning and walking back out of the kitchen and down the hall again.
JC looks back at Brian and sighs, “I think…”
“He’s right huh?” Brian says calmly.
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, I got that feeling too.”
JC sighs again and shakes his head, “You learn something new from one of them everyday now,” he says before turning and walking out of the kitchen.
Brian stares at his back as he walks down the hallway towards the backyard before looking down at his half full glass of black coffee. Huh, he had never really had a liking for black coffee before this either. Go figure.
“When I counted up my demons. Saw there was one for every day…”
Nick looks over at Justin from the back seat of the Navigator and as Justin stares out the tinted window at the already shadowed night sky. Alex’s small curly haired head rested on his father’s lap fast asleep. One of Justin’s hands mindlessly twirled one of the small curls between his fingers as the other props up his chin, so he can look out at the passing scenery. JC was in the drivers seat sitting comfortably with one hand on the steering wheel guiding the large SUV along the asphalt towards the airport. It was the middle of the night and in a few hours the sun would begin to break into the darkness flooding it with streaks of orange and gold. Nick really missed watching the sun rise or set from his home.
“With the good ones on my shoulders. I drove the other ones away…”
Nick looks up as JC looks in the rearview mirror and smiles at him softly.
“You guys sure about this?” JC asks them both.
“Yeah,” Nick says calmly.
Justin shrugs in reply before half mumbling, “I guess.”
Nick looks over at him and frowns, “C’mon, Just…”
“No…not now, Nick,” Justin says still staring out the window.
“So if you ever feel neglected. And if you think that all is lost…”
“JC,” Justin speaks up.
“Yeah?” JC says looking up in the rearview mirror for second.
“Can you promise me something, C?”
“Yeah, Just, sure.”
“Promise me you’ll get her ashes and put them in an urn or something and send them to me…I…I just…”
“Don’t worry about it, Just, you’ll get them,” JC says calmly, “I promise you.”
Justin forces a soft smile and nods, “Thanks, C.”
“I'll be counting up my demons, yeah. Hoping everything's not lost…”
Nick looks at JC in the terminal and sighs, “Thanks a lot man. I mean it. For everything you know.”
“Don’t worry about it, Nick,” JC smiles softly, “Anytime.”
Justin looks at him softly as both his hands are held down by a finger each that are gripped in the small hands of a toddler.
“You guys take care of yourselves ok…I mean you have my number and address if you need me right?” JC stares at them both.
“Yeah, yeah,” Nick says nodding at him, “Don’t worry about us ok.”
Justin nods silently in agreement before looking down at his son again.
“You think the guys are gonna hate me?” Nick asks JC calmly, “Again.”
“Nah,” JC says, “I think Brian understands and he’ll try to explain it to them…I’ll help him out.”
Nick nods again slowly before looking down at his wristwatch, “I think we better get to our gate now, Just,” he says before turning to look at Justin.
“Alright,” Justin says softly bending over to pick up his son and holding onto him as he latches his arms around his father’s neck, “See ya around, C,” he smiles softly at JC before turning around and walking down the large hallway.
“I’ll keep you posted on how he does,” Nick says to JC calmly patting him on the shoulder softly, “Take care ok and make sure the guys know everything is ok…I think they’ll figure it out on their own though…”
JC nods calmly as Nick sighs deeply.
“The world just isn’t the right place for Justin and I I guess…who knows,” he smiles softly patting JC on the shoulder again before brushing past him to follow Justin, “See ya, C,” he yells back over his shoulder.
JC raises his right hand half way and waves softly at the backs of the two retreating men. It was the small hand of a toddler that waved in return to him though.
*Coldplay – “Everything’s Not Lost”