Nick stares at Brian with wide eyes and sighs, “I…I…didn’t mean it to come off like that. I really didn’t.”

“Well that’s how it came off,” AJ snaps.

“Listen guys I understand where you are coming from, but…”

“But you didn’t want to hurt us,” Brian says, “You told us that time after time, but were we that easy to just forget about?”

“I didn’t forget about you guys…”

“You just left us for better or for worse…” AJ says.

“SHUTUP AJ,” Nick yells.

AJ stares at him with wide eyes and folds his arms over his chest.

“YOU HAVE NO DAMNED IDEA WHAT I WAS GOING THROUGH, SO DON’T YOU FUCKING TRY TO PUT THAT ON ME!”

“Stop it!” Brian yells, “I’m sorry it was a stupid question.”

“No no it was a very good question,” AJ says.

“AJ…” Nick starts.

“What…what are you gonna hit me?” AJ asks standing up.

“Don’t make me do anything I’ll regret AJ,” Nick says standing up.

“What and you didn’t already do that?”

“AJ don’t start.”

“Start what? Start to ask questions? Isn’t that why you brought me here? Isn’t it!”

There is a large boom and the sound of break glass as AJ and Nick turn to stare at Brian who is standing up breathing heavily staring at the two of them. They both turn to look at a shattered vase on the ground by the opposite wall that was sitting on the table by Brian.

“SIT DOWN,” Brian yells, “NOW.”

Nick and AJ look at each other and then go back to their seats.

“I refuse to let you two fight like this,” Brian says, “I refuse to! I won’t have this moment go to waste. I want to know what was going on and why you left really? I know it wasn’t just all of the things in the journal Nick…now what was it?” he asks staring at Nick.

Nick sighs and closes his eyes for a second, “Let me start in the beginning then…”

“It was right after the Millennium tour ended that it all started. I don’t really know why, but one night I wanted to go out to one of those hard rock clubs that they have all over the place then. So anyway I went with AJ and AJ got really really drunk. I don’t think he remembers anything that happened that night. But anyway AJ was off doing his own thing and I was doing mine. So I was walking around the club just trying not to be recognized and I bumped into this guy on accident. He was my height, more built then me, tan, blue eyes, with spiked blond hair with blue on the tips. He said his name was Snap and of course I didn’t believe him. No one names their child Snap, but it was his name. He lived in Orlando with his older brother Vaughn as a roommate, so because he lived so close me and him started talking about stuff…boats, skiing shit like that. He was a cool guy. Didn’t seem to give two shits less who I was. Anyway that’s how I met Snap just to start you off with that.”

“What’s that have to do with anything?” AJ asks.

“Snap has everything to do with it,” Nick says staring at him, “Snap reminded me of Tyler Durden in Fight Club…hell in the end I actually thought I did make him up like in that book. He never listened to anyone and did whatever the hell he felt like.”

“So what did he want with you?” Brian asks sitting back down on the floor.

“I’m not really sure,” Nick says, “Money…mind games…I really don’t know. Anyway Snap was AJ’s age and he grew up in what he said was basically the ghetto.”

“What does this have to do with anything?” AJ asks.

“I’m getting there,” Nick snaps, “I would meet up with him when we would go home or through Orlando and we would just go out to clubs and shit. Snap always looked to far into things and when Fight Club came out he thought it was some kind of Bible or something. Snap also had a temper a very bad temper. He would snap at anyone and just let fists fly everywhere. So it first started when we were out one night just walking down the street from a club. Snap had had a little too much to drink and was out of it. Snap had ran with a bad crowd a few years prior to that and he had left kind of suddenly and not on good terms. So when we were walking down the street almost out of nowhere we got pulled down an alley way by these guys. They didn’t want me though they had issues to talk about with Snap.

So I was held up against a wall by this guy who must have weighed around 245 while about three other guys surrounded Snap. Then the gun was pulled out somehow. I didn’t know whose it was or who fired it, but all I knew was the bullet hit Snap straight in the neck. He must have died over the course of a few minutes in the alleyway while the others stared at him. Then they all focused their attention on me. They didn’t know what to do with me. I was a witness, but I had more value to them if I was alive. This is where it all started. To see someone murdered in front of your own eyes is bad enough, but they had this plan. See Snap owed them money lots of it. He ran off with it all one night and moved down here to Florida. They figured I had money and decided that I would carry the burden that Snap had made. I figured fine I’ll pay them off and they’ll leave. I had enough money…”

“They stuck around didn’t they?” AJ asks.

Nick nods, “Who wouldn’t. They took the money and stuck around for a little. The thing is they knew I was seeing everything happen again time after time again when I went to sleep. The shot, the blood, Snap falling over not able to speak, but trying to hold the blood in his neck with his hands. It replayed time after time after time again and again and again in my head,” Nick says closing his eyes and rubbing them, “Always the same too. I wasn’t strong mentally enough because I had been pampered for so many years in this group. So they left eventually and every once and awhile they would call up and ask for money. I gave it to them.”

“How much did it add up to?” Kevin asks.

Nick shrugs.

“So this is what got you worked up in the first?” AJ asks.

“No,” Nick says plainly, “I was basically haunted by the scene, but that all went away.”

“Then what was it?” AJ asks.

Nick looks at his hands and rubs them together, “Snap wasn’t dead.”

“What are you talking about? We can’t just let this opportunity pass,” a young man says to another.

“Well how the hell will we work this out,” the smaller of the two asks.

“We could blackmail him,” the taller of the two says.

“No, too sloppy.”

“Sloppy? What’s your idea then?”

“Well he’s already a wreck after everything that happened right?”

“Yeah, so?”

“Well let’s see exactly how far we can push him.”

“What good will that do?”

“Just think about it. He’s already doing everything we ask now, but if he was just a little more gone God only knows what we could get.”

“Snap do you realize how dangerous that is? This guy is known around the world even if we could do that someone is gonna notice.”

“No no Vaughn listen. They won’t know. He won’t let them know. He’s paranoid about failure and this to him is failure.”

“How will we make it work?”

“Leave it to me. Just leave it to me.”

“What do you mean he wasn’t dead?” AJ asks.

“Snap never died,” Nick says leaning back in his chair, “Never shot either. Just one big elaborate trap set up for me. They knew how to get me there and I fell for it. It was actually my own fault if you think about it.”

AJ stares into the flames of the fire and then shakes his head turning back toward Nick.

“One big plan,” Nick says to himself sighing.

Brian stares up at him and frowns, “You ok Nick?”

“Yeah yeah,” Nick says, “Anyway I found out because at one point I just blew. I refused to deal with it anymore and lunged at one of the guys when he came to meet me for the money one time. The others there jumped on me trying to pull me off and then these two guys came running from a car near by. They looked almost exactly alike except for one was taller then the others. I just stared at them as they ran up one was Snap and one was his older brother Vaughn. I just stared at them dumbstruck and then I got pistol wiped outside of the head by someone. I woke up about an hour later lying on the ground with no one around me. They called me up later and explained everything.

You know it’s bad enough to see your friend killed, but then finding out that he wasn’t really killed and he wasn’t really your friend, he had planned the whole thing out himself was even worse. It makes you feel worthless.

I was going through all this shit and then when I come back to you guys. I had to make sure everything was back to normal. Put on a happy face and sing. God that was hell in itself. I hated masking everything in the beginning. I got good at it in the end though.”

“Why didn’t you just tell us?” Brian asks.

“Because I didn’t want to drag you guys into it. You and Kevin were getting married soon and Howie was starting his business up. AJ was being well AJ. It was my problem not yours.”

“You still should have told us,” Brian says.

“It’s not worth arguing about it now,” Nick says, “But they did stick a round a little pushing me toward the breaking point mentally until finally they just left me alone. I think I became too much work for them except for Snap…” Nick says trailing off.

Justin looks up at him and then down at his watch, “It’s late Nick.”

Nick looks over at him almost as if he was suddenly snapped back into reality and then nods at him getting up quietly from his seat and walking out of the room in a daze.

“Is he ok?” Brian asks Justin.

Justin looks at him and shrugs, “He’s never really talked about this to anyone in a while, so I guess its kind of getting to him now. I mean he knows what’s gonna happen when he tells us we don’t.”

“What was Snap’s last name?” AJ asks.

Justin shrugs, “I dunno. He never said. Well at least Nick said he didn’t.”

AJ nods and stands up then walks out of the room.

“Where are you going?” Brian asks.

“I’ll be back,” AJ yells after himself.

Brian looks over at Kevin who only shrugs in reply.

Justin sighs and stands up as well, “I’m gonna head to bed if that’s ok with you guys?”

“Sure,” Kevin says waving it off while staring at the fire.

Brian nods in agreement.

“Thanks…uh goodnight,” Justin says before walking out of the room quickly.

Brian looks up at Kevin and sighs, “We really don’t know Nick do we?”

Kevin nods, “There’s fucking oceans between us and I don’t mean literally.”

“I…I just wanted it to go back to normal,” Brian says.

Kevin stares at him and frowns. “I should have known it would never happen again.”

“We all hoped it Brian I think even Nick did,” Kevin says, “but we always don’t get what we want,” Kevin says standing up, “I’m gonna go to bed ok?”

“Ok,” Brian says turning back toward the flames.

“Night Bri,” Kevin says and walks out of the room.

Brian watches him leave and then turns toward the flames again. He did the only thing he could think to do then…he put his hands to his face and cried.

Nick stares at himself in the mirror and splashes his face with water. God what was happening to him? His whole body was trembling. If only…he turns his head and stares at his razor sitting on the counter. It would only be a small cut no one would ever know about it. It would be harmless.

He reaches across the sink and grabs his razor fumbling with it with his shaking hands as he pops the blade out.

“Damnit,” he mutters as it falls to the floor with a small clink and he bends down to pick it up off the floor.

“Don’t make me strap you down Carter,” a voice says from behind him and Nick’s breath catches in his throat as he turns around and stares at Justin.

“Oh it’s only you,” he sighs.

Justin shakes his head, “What do I have to keep all the sharp objects away from you now? Tell Kevin no more knives.”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“No but you were about to. Unless you are planning to shave at midnight.”

“Shutup Justin.”

“I just don’t understand why though.”

“What do you mean? I’ve done this many the times before this.”

“Yeah, but you have no reason to now. You’re safe…and sane.”

“Am I?”

Justin stares at him, “Shutup Nick. You know as well as me that you’re fine now. Don’t get yourself so worked up about this.”

“Yeah, but I don’t think they’ll understand.”

“Then make them.”

“How?”

“I dunno.”

“You’re useless Justin.”

“Never said I wasn’t.”

Nick shakes his head.

“Tomorrow we go out and buy an electric razor for you.”

Nick stares down at his hand that is holding the blade.

“Throw it out Nick,” he says.

Nick sighs and throws it into the garbage.

Justin walks by him and picks it out then throws it into the toilet flushing it, “You could always pick it out, but not now.”

Nick stares at him and then back down at the now empty razor, “Will you ever trust me?”

“Not on this land,” Justin says, “Hell Ness doesn’t trust me either. God forbid I’m in the bathroom too long. I’m automatically cutting myself or doing some sort of drug.”

“You’re lucky to have someone that loves you that much.”

“You got three guys in this house that love you like a brother if you only gave them a chance to get close to you again. Take the walls down Nick. C’mon lets go play pool or something,” Justin says, “Kevin has a pool table right?”

“Yeah downstairs,” Nick says, “If it’s still the same.”

“Ok c’mon lets go,” Justin says walking out of the bathroom and through Nick’s room out to the hallway, “ I got this African chick with Eddie Murphy on her skull. She like, “Jigga man why you treat me like animal”. I’m like excuse me Ms. Phoophoo but when I met your ass you was dead broke and naked and now you want half. I got this ho that after twelve million sold mommy’s a narcoleptic always sleeping on hold. Gotta tie the back of her head like Duce Bigalo. I’ve got so many girls across the globe,” he sings walking down the hall as Nick follows after him, “Oh c’mon Nick you know the song. I still don’t get sick of it.”

“And that is a sad sad thing,” Nick says.

Justin makes a face at him and continues walking, “I love girls girls girls girls. Girls I do adoreeee. You put your number on this paper cause I would love to date ya. Hollar at ya when I come off tall.” Nick stares at his back as he walks down the hall, “I think you got the wrong word

s. I also agree with the many people that think you want to be black.”

Justin turns around and stares at him and shrugs, “What can ya do?”

Brian sticks his head out of his door and stares at them walking down the hall. Nick turns around and stares at him.

“Hey,” Nick says.

“Hey.”

“We’re gonna go um play pool. You wanna come?”

“Yeah sure sure,” Brian says walking out of the room and shutting the door behind himself.

“He’s just a little…” Nick says looking at Justin who is singing his part in “What’s Going On”, “Odd is the word I’m looking for. Justin Brian is gonna play with us ok?” Nick says to him.

Justin turns around and nods as he continues to sing, “Barricades can’t block our way. Don’t punish me with brutality. Baby talk to me so you can see what’s going on. What’s going on? What’s going on? What’s going…”

“So how are you Frick?” Nick asks Brian.

“Nothin much Frack,” Brian smiles.

“And so begins the reunion of Frick and Frack,” Justin says as Nick and Brian smile.