~Suicidal Mind~

I've lost all faith that I've ever had.
I lost control and lost my mind.
I'm broken into thousands of peices,
And I wish that I would die...
My heart is sinking deep in my chest.
My face floods with my tears,
And a question wonders through my head,
How did I make it all these years?
There is always too much fighting.
There is never enough silence to think
The cold words of everyone else,
Put me near the edge.
My body tenses at every moment.
My breath comes out in dying sobs,
And I wish for nothing more than to be alone.
Every murmur, every sound.
I feel like I'm going insane.
My eyes close and I scream out.
Nothing will ever be the same.
I'm taunted by every touch.
Every carress from my silver blade.
My body hurts and is discolored,
From the bruises that I have made.
I hate all that I've created.
I hate all else in this world.
These people cause me heartache,
All I wish is nevermore...
Never more let me think-
Never more let me feel pain-
Never more let me cut-
Never more fuck with my brain.
The pills in the cabinet grow tempting.
The knives in the drawer seem so sweet.
The gun is deadly, though still not my friend,
But it feels wrong to admit defeat.
After I'm finished and gone,
Weeks, months, years will go by,
And perhaps after the sencond day,
There will be no more tears to cry.
Nobody will miss me.
Nobody will care when I am gone.
Maybe one or two, no one real,
So it doesn't feel so wrong.
There will be much that I'll miss,
Or at least in my mind.
I never would've found love anyway.
I'd never locate what I want to find.
I'll close my eyes and take a breath.
There's nothing left for me to do.
I've nothing left to live for,
And no luck in finding truth.
Abuse, and use.
The pain and the ache,
I know nobody will care,
So this pitiful life I'll take...