GrecianPD Blue

Author's Note: This is a crossover story with NYPD Blue. Yeah, that's completely impossible, I know, but just go along with it. Trust me. I wrote this as a goof - just having fun, but I liked the way it came out. And I don't own any of the characters from Hercules or NYPD Blue, but I'm not profiting and I mean no harm. If you try and sue, I'll have Sipowicz kick your ass...

Warning: This police fanfic contains adult language. Reader discretion is advised.

“Look at this,” Sipowicz complained, getting out of the car and indicating the wet spot on his trousers.

“You hit one of those potholes, huh Andy?”

“Yeah, Medavoy,” Sipowicz answered patronizingly. “This god forsaken road, and I use the term loosely, has holes big enough to lose the whole car in. Fortunately, we just hit one big enough to jar my tailbone into my spine and make me dump my coffee in my lap.”

Simone stepped forward, having learned long ago that it was best to just let his partner rant and get it over with. He approached the uniform that was standing behind the strand of yellow police tape, trying to disperse the curious crowd of onlookers, as Medavoy and Martinez went to do the canvas.

“What’ve we got?”

“Male Caucasian,” the officer replied, lifting up the tape as Simone ducked under, followed by the still grumbling Sipowicz. He led them to the scene, filling them in along the way. “Found dead early this morning. One stab wound to the heart. Couldn’t find a wallet or ID, but he appears to have the rest of his possessions. Jewelry and such. Place seems to be intact.”

Sipowicz took a quick look around the house while Simone lifted the plastic covering the body. He stared down at the cold, still form for a moment before snapping a Polaroid.

“Guy who found him is in the next room.”

The detectives finished their assessment of the crime scene and followed the uniform into the room where a man was pacing nervously.

“This is Ximenos.” Simone and Sipowicz exchanged a look.

“You know that guy in there?” Simone asked.

“Sure,” the witness replied. “Iolaus. This is... was his house.”

“E.. what?” Sipowicz demanded.

“Iolaus.”

“Any last name?” Simone asked.

“No, just Iolaus.”

“What the hell kind of name is that?” Sipowicz muttered.

“Must be a street name.” Simone turned back to Ximenos. “So what can you tell us about what happened?”

“I was working across the street over there, and I saw Hercules, Iolaus’ partner, come in here early this morning. About an hour later, I hear this commotion going on, then Hercules comes running out of here and takes off down the road. I just wanted to make sure everything was ok, so I came over and that’s when I found Iolaus lying on the floor.”

“You ever see anything suspicious going on over here before with this Iolaus?”

“No, he’s a good guy.”

“What about with his partner?” Sipowicz arched his eyebrows. “They get into a lot of fights? Have a lover’s quarrel, maybe?”

“Hercules wasn’t his *partner* partner,” Ximenos explained.

“So, what? They were business partners?”

“Yeah, I guess you could put it like that. But I‘d never seen them get into an argument before.”

“Make sure you give your address to the uniform officer in case we need to get in touch with you again,” Simone commanded, shaking his head as he turned to leave. Behind him, he heard Sipowicz heave a heavy sigh.

“It’s going to be one of them cases.”

Lieutenant Fancy motioned for his detectives to enter as Simone rapped on his door.

“What have we got?”

“This is one messed up case, boss,” Simone began. “Witness at the scene makes our chief suspect to be the DOA’s partner, Hercules. We ran him through BCI. He was accused of murdering his wife a few years ago, but he was cleared of the charges. Has a few other homicides on his record, but he wasn’t prosecuted for any of them. His old man‘s some kind of big shot.”

“Looks like he’s one of these vigilante types,” Sipowicz said with scorn. “Thinks he’s some kind of superhero.”

“He’s actually been responsible for locking up quite a few skells. But that’s not even the weird part. This Iolaus, the DOA, is listed as having been killed on four separate occasions.”

“Is this some kind of joke?”

“I wish it was. This man has died and come back to life four times.”

“How is that possible?”

“His partner, our suspect, brought him back in one way or another.”

“Are you bringing him in?”

“We haven’t been able to locate him yet,” Sipowicz informed Fancy. “But we got an address on his stepfather. Medavoy and Martinez are bringing him in.”

“Well, keep me posted.” For once, the usually unflappable Lieutenant looked perplexed. “And I want everyone on this case until we figure this all out.”

“I don’t know why I had to come down here,” Jason protested as he was led into the interview room. “I already told you I don’t know where he is.”

“We know that you did,” Medavoy told him. “But when you’ve been in this line of work for a few years, you get a good sense of when people are holding back.”

“Look, Hercules couldn’t have done this,” Jason insisted. “Iolaus was his best friend. Hercules loved him, and he never would have hurt him.”

“Maybe not under normal circumstances...” Medavoy began, but was interrupted.

“Not under any circumstances,” Jason said indignantly. “Hercules didn’t do this. Why don’t you go and pick up his whacko relatives? I can guarantee that one of them is behind all this. They’ve done it before. Killing poor Serena and framing Hercules for it. Ares, he’s the one you should be after.”

“We’re definitely going to want to talk to him, but we still need to get Hercules in here.”

“I don’t know where he is,” Jason repeated stubbornly.

“Look,” Martinez reasoned with him. “No one is going to try and make him guilty if he’s not. But he is a suspect, and we have men out there looking for him. He stands a good chance of getting hurt. But if you tell us where he is, then we can go and pick him up and bring him in. We just want to talk to him and get his side of the story. If he gives us an alibi, or gives us something else to go on, then we‘ll be looking at this Ares harder.”

“I really don’t know where he is,” Jason finally said. “But I have an idea of where you can look.”

“The stepfather gave us some places to look for this Hercules,” Medavoy briefed Fancy. “Andy and Bobby are checking them out now.”

“He give you anything else?”

“He says that Hercules didn’t do it. He’s blaming it on one of his relatives. Apparently a bunch of them have priors. This Jason claims that the murder rap that Hercules was cleared on a few years back was really committed by his half brother.”

“You buy that?”

“He seems to be a pretty straightforward guy, Lieu,” Martinez replied. “He used to be the king of Corinth, and now he runs an academy, training new cadets. We think its definitely worth a conversation with this Ares that he claims did the other murder and framed Hercules for.”

“Have Jill and Diane pick him up,” Fancy requested. “You two reach out to some of these other relatives and see what you can find.”

“You want a soda or something?”

“No, thanks.” Hercules slid into the chair that Simone had pulled out for him. “I’d really just like to know what this is all about.”

“Where were you this morning?” Sipowicz asked, losing some of his forced congeniality.

“I was at my mother’s house for most of the morning,” Hercules told them.

“Can she confirm that?” Simone asked, sitting in the chair next to the suspect.

“Unfortunately, no. She passed away a few years ago.”

“I’m sorry.” Simone gave a nod of sympathy. “So, you were alone at your mother’s all morning?”

“No, I went out and did some errands.”

“Did you happen to stop by and see your friend, Iolaus?” Sipowicz was getting fed up with beating around the bush.

“Yes,” Hercules answered. “I went over there to ask him if he’d come by and help me with my mother’s roof later this afternoon.”

“How long were you there?”

“About an hour.” Hercules narrowed his eyes suspiciously at the detectives. “Why? What is going on?”

“Iolaus was found dead in his house this morning,” Simone told him bluntly.

“You’re lying,” Hercules finally said after a long moment of silence. Sipowicz pulled out the Polaroid that Simone had snapped at the scene and tossed it down on the table in front of the suspect. Hercules’ face went white as he stared at the picture of his friend. “Oh, gods,” he choked out, tracing a shaking finger along the image of his friend’s face.

“We have a witness that puts you at the scene right before the body was discovered.”

“What are you saying?” Hercules whispered, looking up at Sipowicz, blue eyes swimming with tears. “You think I did this?” He looked back down at the picture. “Oh, gods, Iolaus....”

“Do you have any idea who would want him dead?”

“Take your pick.” Hercules laughed humorlessly. “Half of Greece wanted him dead.”

“The thing is,” Simone explained. “The knife wound was small and clean, and there was no sign of a struggle. That indicates to us that he was taken completely by surprise, meaning the perp was probably someone he knew.”

“Or one of my relatives,” Hercules said bitterly. “They have a knack for sneaking up on you.”

“We have your brother, Ares, coming in. We’re going to talk with him, but you’ll have to stay here until we get things sorted out.” Simone stood up and opened the door to the cage. Hercules obligingly walked in, moving like a man underwater, seemingly oblivious of his surroundings. The detectives left the interview room and headed for Fancy’s office.

“Well?” the Lieutenant questioned.

“He seemed pretty torn up when we showed him the Polaroid of the DOA,” Simone informed him. “Didn’t seem like an act.”

“No way was that an act,” Sipowicz blustered. “This guy didn’t do it.”

Simone exchanged a small look with his boss. They both knew that, despite all of his flaws, no detective was better at reading people than Andy Sipowicz.

“You’ve got that half brother of his coming in?”

“Jill and Diane are bringing him in,” Simone answered.

“Bring in that witness from the scene, while you‘re at it,” Fancy requested.

“Yeah, we definitely want to reinterview him.”

“Keep me posted.”

“Bobby, I’m telling you, no way did this guy do it,” Sipowicz repeated as they left Fancy’s office. In his line of work, the crusty detective dealt with death and the grief that came with it on a regular basis. But what he had seen in that man’s eyes as he viewed the picture of his slain friend had haunted him. His soul had been shattered. At that moment, Sipowicz had made a silent promise to find out who was responsible.

John Irvin’s mouth fell open as he took in the sight of the beautiful woman who appeared before his desk. Aphrodite giggled, delighted that she could have such an effect on a man that generally didn’t give women a second glance. Sexual preferences aside, she was a vision and generally demanded, and got, the attentions of everyone in her presence.

“Can...Can I help you?” the PAA whispered, finally finding his voice.

“Well, I hope so, Sweetie. I got a message from a Detective Martinez asking me to come down, so here I am.”

“Have a seat,” John told her, waving at the bench against the wall. “I’ll go tell him you’re here.”

Martinez and Medavoy looked up as the PAA burst excitedly into the coffee room.

“There’s a woman here to see you,” he said breathlessly. “And I don’t think you want to keep her waiting.” The detectives looked at each other and shrugged as he bustled back out into the squad.

“I hope this isn’t going to take long,” Aphrodite said as John slid back into his chair. “I have a manicure scheduled for three thirty.”

“You do have beautiful hands,” John admired. “Do you use paraffin?”

“Of course,” she replied, holding her hands out before her and doing a little admiring of her own. “With aloe lotion in between.”

“You should try this,” the PAA enthused, opening his top drawer and pulling out a sleek tube. “It’s made from wheat germ. All natural, with no animal products. And the scent is just heavenly.”

Aphrodite rose gracefully and stepped up to the desk. John squeezed a dab of the lotion into the palm of her hand and she rubbed it in delicately.

“Bitchin,” she agreed, inhaling the soft fragrance. She gave the man a beautiful smile, making a mental note to see what she could arrange in the love department for him. A throat clearing behind her made her turn. She giggled again as she was greeted once more by two more mouths hanging open. Martinez was the first to recover.

“You must be Aphrodite,” he said, stepping forward to hold the gate open for her. “Thanks for coming in.”

“My pleasure,” she purred, and meant it. She was beginning to like the 15th Squad, with the abundance of cute men willing to adore her.

“Why don’t we talk in the coffee room?” Martinez suggested, pushing the awestruck Medavoy ahead of him as he led the way. “Can we get you any refreshments?”

“No, thanks,” Aphrodite demurred, easing herself into the chair that Medavoy was holding for her. He had appeared to be recovering his senses, but as she flashed him a blinding smile, the detective became speechless once more. “So, what did you want to talk to me about?”

“Do you know a man named Iolaus?”

“Sure,” she answered. “He’s best buds with my baby bro. Why? Is he in trouble?”

“He’s dead,” Martinez said softly.

“Oh, Sweet Cheeks,” Aphrodite whispered sadly. “How?”

“It appears he was murdered,” Medavoy told her. “We have a witness that saw your brother there right before he found the body.”

“You can’t seriously be accusing Hercules of this,” she demanded indignantly.

“We’re following up on some leads, but right now he is a suspect. Aphrodite,” Martinez reached across the table and took her hand. “If you can think of anything that can help us, we need to know. Maybe if you know of someone that might have wanted to hurt Iolaus, or your brother. Maybe someone close to home...”

“You think Ares did it, don’t you?”

“We can’t really say, but he’s one of the leads we’re following up,” Medavoy confirmed.

“If that son of a bitch did this to Curly I will never forgive him,” Aphrodite declared vehemently, her pretty eyes flashing angrily.

“But you don’t know anything you can tell us?”

“No,” she replied. “Our family isn’t exactly what you would call close. Ares and I don’t hang out much, you know?”

“Well, we appreciate you coming in,” Martinez told her as he rose, but Aphrodite didn’t move.

“You have Hercules here?” she asked.

“Yeah, he’s in holding until we get this sorted out,” Medavoy answered.

“Do you think I could see him?”

The detectives exchanged a what-could-it-hurt glance.

“Yeah, we’ll take you to him.”

Hercules lifted his head as the door to the cage swung open and he saw his sister standing there.

“Aphrodite,” he whispered miserably. “He’s gone.”

“I know,” she said gently, coming forward to kneel in front of her brother. He began heaving great sobs as she took him in her arms and slowly rocked him.

“I just saw him this morning,” Hercules cried. “How could this have happened?”

“It’s ok,” Aphrodite comforted, stroking his chestnut hair. “They’re going to find out who did this. Everything’s going to be fine.” But she knew her words rang hollow to the man that had just lost his best friend, the one that was the brother of his heart.

“I don’t understand why I’m here,” Ximenos whined, glancing nervously at the glowering mug of Sipowicz. “I already told you everything I know about what happened.”

“Yeah, you did,” Simone began. “But we were just wondering how much of it was true.”

“What do you mean?”

“Listen, no one here is looking to jam you up if you weren’t involved,” Simone told him. “But you’ve got to be straight with us, and you have to do it now. We’re pretty sure that Hercules isn’t the one that did the murder, and its only a matter of time before we find out who did. Now, if you don’t get in front of that and tell us what really happened, then you better believe we’re going to come down hard on you when we get the truth. So, do you want to tell us what you know and walk out of that door, or do you want to be an accessory to murder and spend the next ten years of your life in jail?”

“I won’t testify to this...” Ximenos said hesitantly.

“There’s no judge here,” Sipowicz pointed out. “So between you, me, him, and the wallpaper, what did you see this morning?”

“Nothing,” the man confessed. “I was just supposed to go over to the house, call you guys, and tell you that I saw Hercules run out of there. But I had nothing to do with Iolaus getting killed, I swear it.”

“Who told you to do this?” Simone asked.

“He’ll kill me,” Ximenos protested.

“Not if he’s locked up. But you’ll be taking his place if you don’t tell us.”

“Ares,” the man blurted out. “He told me to do it. And Ares is one guy you don’t argue with, if you know what I mean. Can I go now?”

“Yeah, you can go,” Sipowicz told him disgustedly. “Just don’t plan on taking no long trips until you hear back from us.”

“Thank you,” Aphrodite accepted the steaming cup of tea that Martinez handed her.

“I know its hard for you seeing your brother locked up like that,” the detective consoled her. “But I promise we’ll get to the bottom of this.”

“Why don’t you go on home, Aphrodite,” Medavoy suggested. “You can’t do anything else here, and we’ll call you the minute we find anything out.”

“Maybe you’re right,” she said, setting her cup on the table and rising to her feet. “I missed my manicure, but I can still make my facial.”

“I can’t believe anyone as beautiful as you needs all that work done,” Medavoy told her shyly.

“Aw, that’s sweet, Gregie.”

Martinez shot his partner a questioning look before he turned to the woman.

“Aphrodite, it was an absolute pleasure meeting you,” he said, taking her hand.

“You are just too cute,” she giggled. “But honey, what is with the outfit? Denim shirt, rainbow striped tie, and a plaid jacket. I mean, really.” Aphrodite waved her hand and Martinez suddenly found himself attired in a sleek Armani suit. “Now that’s more like it. You guys take good care of my baby brother for me, ok?” And with that, she sailed out of the coffee room, blowing a kiss to John as she left the squad.

“One question,” Martinez said slowly, looking down at his new clothing. “How in the hell am I going to explain this to Gina?”

“So, Ares,” Detective Russell began, resting her palms on the table as she leaned in to face the man seated before her. “Can you account for your whereabouts this morning?”

“I was working,” Ares replied in a bored tone, not even trying to disguise the fact that he was staring at her chest.

“Where do you work?”

“I’m the freelance type,” he told them, turning his head to size up Kirkendall.

“Specifically, you do... what?”

“Let’s just say I negotiate a few... deals, and leave it at that.”

“So you’re some kind of agent?”

“Of sorts,” Ares grinned. He was really into the brunette, yet something was drawing him to the blond. There was a fierce quality to her ice blue eyes that reminded him of Xena.

“And you were working this morning?”

“Oh, yeah,” he said, turning back to Russell. “I’ve got a monster deal in the works.”

“Do you know a man named Iolaus?” Kirkendall questioned.

“Unfortunately. He’s the little pipsqueak that sticks to my darling half brother like they were joined at the hip. Why? Did somebody whack him?”

“Yeah, somebody did,” Russell told him. “You don’t seem too upset about it.”

“Why should I be? He was a thorn in my side. Ruined more of my deals than I care to think about. But I’m sure my dear brother is properly heartbroken.”

“He’s pretty torn up about it,” Kirkendall agreed. “You wouldn’t happen to know anything about Iolaus getting stabbed, would you?”

“Nope,” Ares answered with a smug smile.

“That’s funny,” Russell continued. “Because we have a witness who claims you threatened him and made him give us a phony story about Hercules running from the house before Iolaus was found dead. Now why do you think that is?”

“Must have me confused with someone else,” Ares uttered with complete confidence. “I didn’t kill anybody.”

“Look you prick,” Kirkendall snapped, getting in the suspect’s face. “We know you were involved in this. Maybe you didn’t do the actual murder, but we’re going to pin it all on you if you don’t start talking.”

Ares gave the blond detective a lascivious grin. Oh yeah, definite shades of Xena.

“In that case,” he drawled. “You’re going to want to talk to Discord.” He took the yellow pad that the detective shoved across the table and scribbled down an address.

“What a creep,” Russell muttered as they left the interview room and headed for Fancy’s office.

“Tell me about it,” Kirkendall agreed. “That guy makes Don look like Prince Charming.”

Sipowicz and Simone were already in with Fancy, but the Lieutenant waved in Russell and Kirkendall.

“He give you anything?”

“We like him for being involved,” Russell began. “We’re not sure to what extent, but he definitely could have done it. He wasn’t too fond of the DOA.”

“He pins the actual murder on his sister and gave us an address,” Kirkendall added.

“How many kids are in this family?” Fancy asked with a confused frown. The detectives just shrugged.

“You want us to pick her up?” Russell asked.

“Yeah, and take Andy and Bobby with you.”

Simone stepped up to the temple doors, shooting a glance to his fellow detectives who were huddled out of sight of the peephole. Sipowicz gave him a slight nod, and he banged his fist against the door.

“Who’s there?” came a suspicious female voice.

“Offering for the goddess Discord,” Simone answered, displaying the ornate vase in his hands. There were sounds of a chain being unlatched and a deadbolt turning. The door swung open to reveal a dark haired girl, ruby lips twisted into a predatory smile.

“Well, tall, dark, and handsome. Just what are you offering?”

“Why don’t you let me come inside and put this down, and then you’ll find out,” Simone told her suavely.

Swinging the door wide open, Discord stepped aside to admit him. Instantly, the other detectives pushed their way in.

“What in Hades do you think you’re doing?” Discord demanded as Russell shoved her up against the wall.

“We’re placing you under arrest for the murder of Iolaus,” Russell told her, slapping a pair of cuffs around her wrist. Discord shot a pitiful glance at the handsome man who had knocked on her door. “Don’t even think about it,” Russell snapped.

“I found this one in the bathroom trying to dump about a half a kilo of ambrosia down the toilet,” Sipowicz declared, appearing with a squirming man in his grasp.

“I didn’t do anything,” he was blubbering. “The stuff was Discord’s. Just let me go and I’ll tell you everything!”

“Deimos, you idiot,” Discord hissed. “You’d better keep your mouth shut, if you know what’s good for you.”

“Why don’t you shut your own mouth,” Kirkendall advised. “At least until we get back to the station.” She began reading the Miranda Rights as the detectives led the two suspects out to their waiting cars.

“I haven’t done anything wrong,” Discord protested loudly. “I was in my temple all day today.”

“Yeah, huh?” Simone paced around the table once before pulling out the chair across from her and sliding into it. “You got anybody that can give you an alibi on that?”

“Deimos,” she answered smugly. “He was with me.”

“Well, I guess she has us there,” Sipowicz pouted. “We can’t pin anything on her, with such a reliable witness to verify her story.” The detective moved from his station against the wall and approached the girl, his manner becoming more fierce. “Except for the fact that your pal Deimos broke about two seconds after Detectives Russell and Kirkendall got him in the interview room. He couldn’t spill his guts fast enough.”

“We got enough out of him to put you away for a long time, Discord,” Simone said ominously. “That stash of ambrosia alone is enough to send you up for 20 years. But we aren’t really interested in that. We want to know about Iolaus.”

“What about him?” Discord muttered sullenly.

“We know you killed him,” Sipowicz continued. “What we want to know is how that scumbag Ares is involved.”

“What does it matter?” she burst out. “If you’re so sure I did it, then convict me.”

“Look, Discord,” Simone began. “I don’t believe you murdered this guy in cold blood. If Ares put you up to this, or threatened you, then those are mitigating circumstances. If you killed this guy because you feared for your own life, then you’re looking at a lot less time for yourself.”

“Jail would be better than what Ares would do to me if he found out I told you anything.”

“If this all played out like I think it did, Ares will be busy worrying about his own jail term. All you have to do is tell us what happened. You’ll have to do some time, but all the rest of these charges go away. You’re in a real position to help yourself, and this is your only shot. Did Ares make you do it?”

“Yes,” she confessed bitterly, staring hard at Simone. “He told me what to do. And Ares is someone you don’t go against.”

“Did he threaten you? Tell you what would happen if you didn’t do what he wanted?” Sipowicz asked.

“He didn’t have to. I’ve seen what happens to people that betray him.”

“So,” Simone prompted. “He ordered you to kill Iolaus.”

“I was supposed to wait until Hercules left, then do it,” Discord explained. “I didn’t want to. Not that I didn’t want that little twerp dead, but messing with him meant messing with Hercules, and I’ve learned from experience that there are limits to how far you can push him. Hercules isn’t someone you really want to go against either. There are lots of... repercussions. But I figured I’d be better off taking my chances with him over Ares.”

“Write it down.” Simone slid the yellow pad across the table. With a heavy sigh, Discord picked up the pen and began to write.

Sipowicz entered Interview One and saw that the form huddled in the cage hadn’t moved.

“How’s it going?”

Hercules looked up at the words, but didn’t answer.

“You want a soda or something?”

“No, thank you.”

“We’re working on getting you out of here,” the detective informed him. “Just sit tight. It shouldn’t be too much longer.”

“Did Ares do it?”

The blue eyes had a look of such lost helplessness that Sipowicz had to look away. He answered the question by way of a nod.

“We’re trying to get a confession out of him now,” he explained. Hercules once more hung his head, shoulders slumped in defeat. “You sure you don’t want anything?”

“No.”

“I’m sorry for your loss.” Sipowicz had said the words many times, but rarely with such heartfelt sympathy as this man’s naked grief brought out of him.

“He was my best friend.” The voice was muffled, but the tone was from a soul laid bare.

“Yeah.” The gruff detective nodded and let himself out of the room.

“Martinez, what the hell are you wearing?” Sipowicz had been on his way to Fancy’s office but had done a double take as he’d passed the desk of his fellow detective.

“Don’t ask,” Martinez replied.

Shaking his head, Sipowicz continued on. He rapped at the Lieutenant’s door and let himself in without waiting for an answer.

“He go for it?” Sipowicz demanded without giving anyone the chance to brief him.

“No,” Kirkendall replied. “He was too busy putting the moves on Diane and me.”

“We can’t prosecute without a confession,” ADA Costas informed them. “It’s his word against Discord’s, and she’s already admitted to doing the actual killing. I’m afraid you don’t have much of a case without his admission of guilt.”

“What about that witness that claims Ares forced him to make up the story about Hercules running from the building?” Fancy asked.

“He won’t testify,” Simone answered. “He’s probably already in the wind by now, anyway.”

“Let me know when you’re ready for me to file charges,” the ADA told them. “I’ll be upstairs.” She picked up her briefcase and left the office, giving Sipowicz a small smile as she passed.

“Andy,” the Lieutenant commanded. “Go reinterview Ares and see what you can get out of him.”

Sipowicz nodded, and as they began filing out of the office, he turned to his fellow detectives.

“How did you go at him?”

“Every way we could, short of agreeing to a threesome,” Russell explained. “But we couldn’t get him to budge an inch on his story.”

“Any chance he’ll lawyer up?”

“I don’t think you need to worry about that,” Kirkendall answered. “He’s having too good a time breaking balls to even think of it.”

Sipowicz pushed open the door to the interview room and nodded at the officer stationed inside. The man nodded and left, leaving the detective alone with the suspect.

“What happened to the chicks?” Ares asked in a bored tone.

“You’ve got me now,” Sipowicz answered.

“Lucky me.”

“Listen to me, you miserable hump,” the detective snarled. “Your sister gave you up. So did all the other people you thought you had terrified into keeping quiet. Everyone knows that you were behind that Iolaus getting killed, and we are not leaving this room until you admit to that.”

“Or what?” Ares was stunned as he received a sharp blow to the back of the head. “I don’t think you want to do that again, old man.”

“You’re threatening me? You think you scare me?” Sipowicz bent down and got right in the suspect’s face. “You intimidate the world, don’t you Ares? With your bad attitude and black leather, making you look like some kind of satanic biker. Well you don’t intimidate me. And if you don’t get your smart mouth talking about how you set this whole thing up, you’ll find out just how well an old man can clean your clock. Then we’ll see how many people are afraid of you after that.”

Ares glared hatred at the detective.

“I didn’t do anything,” he insisted sinisterly.

“Say that again,” Sipowicz cautioned. “I dare you. Tell me again about how innocent you are.”

“I didn’t do....” Ares’ words were cut off by another smack to the head. With a growl, he sprang from the chair at the detective. After a brief tussle, he soon found himself pinned up against the wall with the detective’s bulk firmly holding him in place.

“You made Discord kill that guy, didn’t you?” Sipowicz yelled. The suspect remained silent, and the detective cuffed him hard again. “Didn’t you?”

“Yes,” Ares shouted. “I did it, ok?”

Sipowicz pulled him away from the wall and shoved him back into his chair.

“Why?” he demanded.

“To punish Hercules,” Ares admitted, rubbing the arm that had been twisted painfully behind his back. “The way to get at him is through Iolaus. Everybody knows that.”

“Write it down.”

Ares cringed slightly as the detective slammed the pad on the table in front of him. But he took up the pen and began to scribble his confession.

Simone approached his partner as Sipowicz was sprinkling a little food into the fish tank.

“He go for it?”

“Yeah, he’s writing up his statement now.”

“How much of a tune up did you have to give him?”

“Not bad,” Sipowicz answered, sliding the cover back over the tank. “Couple of slaps. He went pretty quick after that.”

“Andy!” Medavoy ran up to them in a frenzy. “There’s a problem with your guy. You’d better get in there.”

The detectives went back to the interview room to find a very smug Ares sitting with the man that had been previously DOA that very morning.

“What the hell...?”

“It’s simple, Detective,” Ares explained to Sipowicz. “No body, no murder, no crime. So me, and my associates, are free to go.” He sauntered past the confused detectives into the hall, bellowing for Discord.

Iolaus hopped down off the edge of the table where he had been sitting and gave a small shrug of the shoulders.

“One of those days,” he offered with an apologetic grin.

“Hey, James,” Medavoy said breathlessly, hurrying up to his partner’s desk. “Would you mind doing the fives on this one?”

“Sure, Greg,” Martinez answered agreeably. “But where are you rushing off to?”

“I’ve got a date,” Medavoy beamed. “With that Aphrodite. I called her to let her know what happened with the case, and I don’t know. I asked her out, and she said yes.”

“Well, you’d better not keep her waiting.” Martinez grinned as his partner nervously smiled and went to get his coat, almost knocking over Simone in the process. Medavoy stopped long enough to stammer out his good fortune, then was out the door. Simone went to sit on the edge of Russell’s desk.

“Discord go home with Ares?”

“Yeah,” Russell told him. “She wasn’t too happy about it. Said she’d rather face trial for the murder. I gather he wasn’t too pleased that she ratted him out.”

“There was definitely something weird about those two,” Simone muttered. “Real couple of freaks.”

“Snazzy dressers, though. I was thinking of maybe taking a few wardrobe tips from that Discord. You know, something to wear around the bedroom. What do you think?”

“I think you might look good in leather and studs,” he told her, a definite gleam in his eye.

“Well, I’m heading home,” Russell informed him with a sly glance. “Don’t be too long, ok?”

Simone watched her leave before going to sit at his desk across from his partner.

“I still can’t believe we had to cut that asshole loose,” Sipowicz grumbled.

“Like he said, no body, no crime.” Simone stuck a sheet of paper in his typewriter and stared blankly at it for several minutes. “I have no idea how to write this one up. They’re never going to believe this one downtown.”

“I guess its just as well that he walked,” Sipowicz continued, slipping on his glasses as he examined the yellow paper before him. “This confession never would have held up. Just what the hell does this say, anyhow?”

He shoved the paper at his fellow detective and Simone looked at the foreign symbols that made up Ares’ statement.

“I don’t know, partner. It’s all Greek to me.”

“Wise ass.”

Disclaimer: No one was harmed during the writing of this story. Hercules and Iolaus had a very heartfelt and touching reunion. In fact, John Irvin is still in tears over it.

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