Platoon of Recruits and Gunnery Sergeant (Drill Sergeant) Hartman: (singing) Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Jesus, happy birthday to you.
Drill Sergeant: Today is Christmas. There will be a magic show at zero nine thirty. Chaplain Charlie will tell you about how the free world will conquer Communism with the aid of God and a few Marines. God has a hard-on for Marines, because we kill everything we see. He plays his games, we play ours. To show our appreciation for so much power we keep heaven packed with fresh souls. God was here before the Marine Corp, so you can give your heart to Jesus, but your ass belongs to the Corp! Do you ladies understand?
Platoon: Sir, yes, sir.
Sergeant: I can't hear you!
Platoon: Sir, yes, sir!
Helicopter Door Gunner: Anyone who runs is a VC. Anyone who stands still is a well disciplined VC. (laughs) You guys oughta do a story about me some time.
Sergeant Joker, reporter for "Stars And Stripes": Why should we do a story about you?
Gunner: 'Cause I'm so fuckin' good! That ain't no shit neither. I've done got me one hundred and fifty-seven dead gooks killed and fifty water buffaloes too. They were all certified.
Joker: Any women or children?
Gunner: Sometimes
Joker: How can you shoot women and children?
Gunner: Easy. Ya just don't lead 'em so much. (laughs) Ain't war hell?
"The dead know only one thing: it is better to be alive." -Mathew Modine as Sergeant Joker
Colonel: Marine, what is that button on your body armor?
Sergeant Joker: A peace symbol, sir.
Colonel: Where'd you get it?
Joker: I don't remember, sir.
Colonel: What is that you've got written on your helmet?
Joker: 'Born To Kill,' sir.
Colonel: You write 'Born To Kill' on your helmet and you wear a peace button. What's that supposed to be, some kind of sick joke?
Joker: No, sir.
Colonel: What is it supposed to mean?
Joker: I don't know, sir.
Colonel: You don't know very much, do ya?
Joker: No, sir.
Colonel: You better get your head and your ass wired together or I will take a giant shit on you.
Joker: Yes, sir.
Colonel: Now answer my question or you'll be standing tall before the man.
Joker: I think I was trying to suggest something about the duality of man, sir.
Colonel: The what?
Joker: The duality of man. The Jungian thing, sir.
Colonel: Who's side are you on, son?
Joker: Our side, sir.
Colonel: Don't you love your country?
Joker: Yes, sir.
Colonel: So how about getting with the program? Why don't you jump on the team and come on in for the big win?
Joker: Yes, sir.
Colonel: Son, all I've ever asked of my Marines is for them to obey my orders as they would the word of God. We are here to help the Vietnamese because inside of every gook there is an American trying to get out. It's a hardball world, son. We've got to try to keep our heads until this peace craze blows over. (salutes)
Joker: (salutes) Aye aye, sir.
"I wanted to see exotic Viet Nam, the jewel of southeast Asia. I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting people of an ancient culture and kill them. I wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill." -Joker
"I am in a world of shit, yes, but I am alive and I am not afraid." -Joker
