Journal
10/01/02 –
Had my first doctor’s appointment today. Was really nervous beforehand, but it went OK. We talked about my symptoms and stuff. I’ve been prescribed with Paroxetine tablets, which are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). These work by bringing serotonin levels back to normal. I have to start taking them tomorrow morning.
So how am I feeling now that I’ve taken that first step…? I don’t know; I feel better that it’s out in the open, and that I’m getting help. I’ve told a couple of my friends and my parents. That was difficult. But I’m glad I did it. Everyone’s been really great – “I’m here for you if you need me” seems to be a recurring phrase…
I’ve been given a doctor’s note to get the week off university, so I’ll have some time to sort my head out…. I haven’t spoken to any of my lecturers yet (sent a couple of emails, but no response yet), so I don’t know what they’ll have to say. I don’t want to drop out, but I don’t think I’ll get any decent marks his year, if I pass anything at all...
I managed to eat a sandwich at lunchtime, and had some pasta tonight, although my stomach is in the old proverbial knots. My head is pretty sore, but I think that’s from lack of sleep, and my eyes are sore too. And I’ve got the shakes. So really, I’m not doing too good, but I’m more positive than I was before. A lot more.
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