The Pentanath: Adventures in the Avathar
Book 1: Chapter 4 - Sweet Sorrow
by Sienna Dawn
NC-17

Disclaimer: All familiar characters of this story belong to the awesome world and works of JRR Tolkien, who is an unparalleled genius of this genre. All unfamiliar and original characters, animals and places are of my own invention. I do not derive any monies from this work and created this story solely out of the love and respect that I hold for all of the works related to this canon.

Book 1: Chapter 4 - Sweet Sorrow

Several months passed since Min had spotted Haldir. She still waited by the edge of the marshlands, far away so as not to be noticed, but close enough to spot him. Yet, she had not seen the familiar figure.

Perplexed, she had decided to come out to the shore one day and see for herself. Perhaps he no longer trapped there and had instead moved his work further north. She hoped that was not the case.

And so it came to happen that one bright morning, Min left the edge of the grove and stepped onto the marshland, covering the distance in less than an hour and stopping at the edge of the cliffs. Here, the wind was much stronger and it buffeted her from all sides, her hair plastered to her head. Green eyes surveyed the beach.

Nothing.

She gazed at the water and saw his red markers.

Min let out a breath. So he was still trapping here. Her dark brown eyebrows furrowed in thought. Then that meant he had found an alternate route. A route that did not take him past the House.

Suddenly angry, she righted herself. So, she thought, he was going to play it this way. Well, she decided, she can be complex too. But then the anger just as suddenly left her and she slumped her shoulders.

Why was she wasting her time? Walking slowly away, her eyes misted with unshed tears.

The wind seemed to pick up on her misery and a low keening began. But Min was not aware of it as she made her way home. That night, for the first time, she admitted defeat and cried bitterly in the solitude of her room.

~*~*~*~*~

As summer turned to fall, Haldir continued to use the alternate route to his traps, avoiding the House of the Elms. Yet, his heart did not give him peace and nightly be fought himself against his desire for Min. He knew Min had watched him every month and had seen her walk out to the cliff's edge early on that long ago spring morning.

His heart ached for her company, but he knew that the situation was hopeless. Min was not for him and that much had been made clear to him by her father. And then the summons to the House of Manwe had done it. He was forbidden to as much as touch her.

Why, he did not know and was not about to defy the powers of the world. He knew Min had also been summoned and it was on that day that he admitted his greatest failure. For his heart had failed him, failed to defend his love for her, failed to protect her from the grief thrust upon her.

Many times he had wondered why this should be. Never were his questions answered. They had not been answered on that fateful day when the Doom had been passed nor now, centuries later.

And what had come of it, he asked himself? Two hearts broken. Why?

Sighing, he ran his hand through his hair and relaxed in the wide flet he had made for himself deep in the elm groves outside of Kortirion, the ancient tower city which was the center of Tol Eressea.

Haldir recalled the presence of Manwe, bright, glittering light from the throne upon which he sat. Accustomed to the light of Galadrield, he had stood proudly before the Vala and waited. Haldir had known before hand that the summons involved his courtship of Min but was not certain as to why the Valar had become involved.

He had listened to the Doom of Manwe, forbidding his marriage to Min, forbidding all contact with the maiden, and it was on that day that his heart had failed him. He had wanted to say so many things, but when he was given the opportunity, all he could do was kneel and simply state that all would be done as was commanded. So easily he had slipped into the role of warrior following orders.

Only, it came to him later, he was not a warrior anymore. But the Valar had commanded this and so he must obey.

Slowly he had left the great hall on that mournful day, to be met by an anxious Min, whose eyes teared at the sight of his face.

Haldir recalled now how Min had come to him one night, in defiance of the Doom, in great secret. Softly, she had tread into his grove, a journey, Haldir knew, that took two days' march. He had been amazed at her boldness, and even more so by her words. Long had they argued, until at last Min voiced what was foremost in her mind.

"We do not need to remain on Tol Eressea, Haldir." Her eyes had beseeched him. "We can make for the inland of Aman, and there plight our troth and live out our lives." She had looked upon him longingly.

But Haldir's face had shown great doubt and sorrow at her words, "Do you forget the Doom of the Noldor, Min? Do you not remember what happens when one defies the Lords of the West?" His voice had been serene, but in his mind there was turmoil. Would Min so easily condemn them both?

But Min had argued that perhaps they could both approach Varda and make their case known to her. It was then that Haldir's patience had run out. "I will not defy Manwe, Min! It is folly for us to even be meeting and you should not have come here."

But Min had given Haldir a long look and the words that slowly and deliberately came from her shocked and saddened Haldir, "I have hope for both of us!" She had exclaimed, her green eyes flashing into his deep silver gaze, "But it seems you do not! My father was right. You are different from us." Haldir had winced at the words for he knew now that it was Eadendir who spoke and not Min. Yet, he had let her continue.

"The Eldar of Middle Earth carry too many scars," she had wept, "perhaps you cannot love." She threw the words at him carelessly, openly weeping and Haldir had forgiven her for he knew she did not know the true import of what she said. "Very well, then Haldir," Min had finally said and dried her tears, "It shall be as you want. I shall go and leave you." And she had turned to go.

But not before Haldir had stood in her way and brought her chin up so that their eyes could meet. When he spoke, his voice was heavy and thick with emotion, "Min, many of the things you say are but your father's words, and now you use them against me unjustly. I do not understand why your father has seen fit to obtain a Doom, but obtained it he has, and as much as our hearts cry out against it, we must have faith that there is a higher wisdom in this. One we do not yet know."

But Min had broken away from Haldir and had glared bitterly at him, "You call this wisdom?"

"Aye," Haldir countered, "the Valar do not lightly meddle in the affairs of the elves. There is a greater reason for what has happened and mayhap one day we shall see what it is and be grateful to the Valar for their intercession."

Min had given Haldir an incredulous look and turned from him, "I do not understand this, Haldir. I do not understand you!" Her green eyes had shone with doubt. "I believed you cared for me." Her voice held a note of defiance that Haldir had not noted before.

"As I still do," he had replied heavily, "You cannot know how difficult it is for me to stand between you and your father." He took her by the shoulders and leaned down closer to her.

"You said we could abandon Tol Eressea and go inland." His eyes had searched Min's face and he had seen that she did not understand. "Where in all of Aman could we go, Min? To defy a Doom and a Vala is an ultimate act of betrayal. You know what will happen. Where could we go then?" Min's eyes had narrowed, but he had cut her off, "Varda will not act against Manwe, this you know, and your very presence here is a defiance of Manwe. How can we ask for more when we cannot simply abide by their will?" His silver eyes had descended swiftly over Min's slender form.

Turning to leave, Min had freed herself from his hands and answered sadly, "I am stunned that you can do so, so easily, without thought of the consequences."

Haldir had not stopped her then and she had descended the strong ladder away from his talan. Quickly, she had walked into the dark groves and in moments was gone.

Long had Haldir pondered upon their words and Min's logic and knew that she was, in some ways, right. All of what had happened had no reason to it. At least none that he understood then. Yet, his instincts told him that there would be more to this drama and that it would be played out sooner than he expected.

Presently Haldir let his eyes wander about the woods below his flet. That incident between Min and himself had taken place centuries before, he reflected. Never again had they had contact. Sighing deeply, he left his flet and dropped to the dark wood below him and walked to the Gliding River. The sounds of its waterfall was clearly distinguishable.

Disrobing quietly, Haldir walked to the river's edge and dove in, hoping the cool waters would soothe his aching heart.

~*~*~*~*~

Far from where Haldir swam and sought relief from loneliness, despair and doubt, the House of the Elms was suddenly roused from its usually quiet slumber.

A slender maiden wearing a black riding outfit burst into the personal living quarters she shared with the rest of her family. She had news to tell and her bright eyes flashed with excitement!

Quickly, she ran to the dinning room and saw it was empty. Dropping the dark-green velvet riding cap onto the dinning table, she exited the empty chamber and came to a long and narrow hallway. In one direction lay the stairs to the kitchens and she could hear the cheerful banter of the staff and Cook. In the other lay the upstairs rooms. Gambling that her sister was again hiding somewhere with her nose in a book, she chose the upper chambers and ran down the long hallway, climbing the steps two at a time.

"Min!" called Avraniel, as she reached the top of the stairs and stepped into yet another long hallway. It was quiet, cool and tranquil here. The walls were fashioned of a dark wood, and gay and ancient tapestries decorated the walls. Delicately wrought wooden and iron tables with a vase or two full of fresh flowers were placed at specific locations. The lingering scent of vanilla and cinnamon wafted from the kitchens and permeated the silent corridor.

"Min!" Avraniel, Min's youngest sister, walked from room to room, "Min!" her voice called more loudly.

No answer.

Just as she was about to run to the lower level of the lodge, Min's voice called back, "Here, Niel...I am in the study hall."

Avraniel halted at the sound of Min's voice and quickly came to a door. She turned the latch and stepped into large and bright room filled with bookcases. Chairs, divans and benches littered the room, as this was the common reading area for guests and used by the family as well. Tapestries hung on the walls, and everywhere there were vases filled with colorful flowers. The room offered three windows facing the vast ocean behind the house. The heavy silk drapes that normally hung closed had been pulled aside and the windows thrown wide open. The soft swells of the sea and the cries of the gulls echoed eeriely in the still chamber.

"Min!" Avraniel called and sat down on the wide couch next to her sister. Turning the book toward her she grimaced, "Oh...not another history book!" Niel's bright blue gaze sparkled. " 'Tis so boring, history." She sat back and propped her feet on the low table before them.

Smiling, Min reached over and gently pushed her sister's feet to the floor.

"Is there something amiss?" Min's soft low voice questioned patiently.

Avraniel shook her head, but her eyes were large and luminous."Nay...nothing of real import."

Min frowned and closed the book. "What is it, Niel?"

Niel turned wide eyes on Min's face. "Only that Odomil has called upon Father again." Her eyes twinkled but with worry and not mirth. "That makes twice this month, Min." Niel's voice held a tinge of warning.

Min nodded. "Aye" she whispered, worry creasing her fair features.

But it was Niel who voiced what Min could not bring herself to say, "You do not think that he is..." she did not finished the sentence.

Min sat back and closed her eyes. Dear Valar! "I hope not, Niel" she finished for her sister. "I hope not."

~*~*~*~*~

But indeed, Min's worst fears came to pass several months later as her wedding bans to Odomil Thinguve was announced in all of Tol Eressea. As the last of his house, Odomil had amassed huge tracts of land and a large towered keep was built for himself and his new bride. Min's father, Eadendir, approved the match wholeheartedly, glad that his daughter would be cared and provided for, but also mindful of the vast estates his daughter would now share with her new husband. Eadendir was not an elf to miss opportunity when it appeared on his doorstep and he considered the pairing of Min and Odomil to be most auspicious indeed.

Throughout the planning, Min had remained stiff and aloof, her heart closed to the reality of her situation. Each night she called to Haldir and in her dreams he came to her and there in his arms she wept and told him of the marriage. Never did she recall what his words were in her dreams and all she remembered were his sweet whispered endearments.

Inexplicably to those who knew her best, Min did not contest the match. Elven customs frowned upon arranged marriages and rarely did parents seek to match their offspring. Those interested in marriage came to it willingly and freely, and no one understood why Min did not use this weapon to end the farce begun by her father. Some said her heart had died the day Haldir and she were separated and others maliciously gossiped that she had probably sought relief from her loneliness with Odomil and thus had sealed her fate. But no matter the talk, Min did not protest the arrangements and all went ahead as planned.

As the day of the wedding approached, Min resolved to be as good a wife as she could, and never to show weakness or despair. For although Odomil was kind and considerate, Min knew the marriage was irrevocable even if they were never to truly bond. In her heart she could not understand this marriage and had tried to explain it gently to Odomil. But he had smiled in his kind and gentle way and had told her he would wait as long as it took to gain her love.

Min knew then her fate was sealed. Yet, her dreams of Haldir gave her hope. That, she thought, the Valar had not forbidden. Their dreams belonged to them and she wondered if he too dreamed of her, longed for her, desired her. No, her mind once told her. He had not fought for you.

Sad, Min waited as the day of her wedding came.

She said all the right things, performed all the right moves, smiled when she was expected to and allowed her husband to take her body as was his right. And though the joining was pleasurable to Odomil, Min had remained still and placid, forging in her mind a wall of stone and steel that no one could scale.

It was in this manner that she lived out her life within the tall tower that Odomil called Guve Hall.

And so the years passed and one day Min discovered she was going to have a child. She had wanted a child. She had asked for the child. And in joy Odomil had given her the child that both fused into life.

It was an uneventful pregnancy, her body swelling, her breasts engorged with milk for her babe. Her pains came upon her one winter evening and she labored for hours, the babe unwilling to leave the safe coccoon of its mother's womb. Long hours of labor had weakened Min and she barely had the strength to push the babe. Frightened, Odomil sent for the Healers.

But too late they arrived. Min passed from the world, leaving in her place a chubby babe of pale gold hair and deep set blue eyes.

In his grief, Odomil called the babe Lisse Nyere, which meant Sweet Sorrow.

And so, to the Halls of Mandos was Min's soul taken and there she dwelled in peaceful rest. Her body was given to the sea, which had been her great comfort during the lonely years of her marriage.

Odomil, in his sorrow, lost his mind and shunned the babe. On the same night his child was born, he disappeared. And so Lisse Nyere was brought from Guve Hall to dwell within the House of the Elms. There, she was loved and doted upon as if she were a delicate treasure. Never was she called by her full name, always answering to Lisse.

The years passed slowly....

The child, Lisse, grew within the shadow of her father's Hall, where she rarely set foot. She was neither an overly beautiful nor comely child, and she neither possessed her mother's melancholic tendencies or her father's fits of darkness. She was instead a typical, curious child, who ran free and barefoot among the elms and marshes of the lands her grandfather owned. Her contact with the outside was limited only to the fisher folk who visited the House, and from them Lisse learned the tales, legends and news of the interior and the rest of the island. Yet, happy she was and never did she display a desire to leave her home behind and explore the wilds of Tol Eressea. And as she grew and ripened, so did Guve Hall fade and yield to the vines and creeping grasses.

In time, the great tower keep built by Odomil was swallowed by branches and groves, and only those who knew where to look could find it. It became a wild place, and soon whispers turned to legend. In the course of time, some said that Guve Hall was cursed and haunted. But none dared prove or disprove old tales.

Of Odomil's fate nothing was ever known. Some said that in his madness, he had leapt into the deep waters of the Shadowy Sea and there met his death. Some said that he and a large steed he rode roamed the salt marshes at night. Others said he had been taken by the Valar. No one knew for certain what had been the fate of Odomil Thinguve.

~*~*~*~*~

Key:

Tol Eressea - The Lonely Isle. The island in the Bay of Eldamar before reaching the continent of Aman.

Noldor and Teleri - two of the three kindreds of the elves.

Feanor - Considered one of the greatest of the Eldar, the maker of the silmarils, the perfector of Tengwar (The Alphabet of Feanor).

The Doom of the Noldor - When Melkor, with the help of Ungoliant, destroyed the Two Trees of Valinor, the Valar came to Feanor and asked him if he would give up the silmarils, for the light inside the jewels could restore the trees. But Feanor refused the Valar's request. However, Melkor stole the silmarils and the Noldor gave him chase until they reached Alqualonde and asked the Teleri for their ships to sail to Middle Earth. The Teleri refused and the Noldor rose up and killed the Teleri. This is called the "Kinslaying", and is considered one of the vilest acts of the Noldor. It is said that when they sailed away from Aman, a great shadow rose up behind them blocking their return to the Blessed Realms. It is believed that it was Ulmos who uttered the Doom of the Noldor or also called The Prophecy of the North, when the Noldor reached Middle Earth, and goes like this:

"Tears unnumbered ye shall shed; and the Valar will fence Valinor against you, and shut you out, so that not even the echo of your lamentation shall pass over the mountains. On the House of Feanor, the wrath of the Valar lieth from the West unto the uttermost East, and upon all that will follow them it shall be laid also."

The Doom of the Noldor/The Prophecy of the North, by JRR Tolkien - Quenta Silmarillion

The Lords of the West - The Valar

Varda - Manwe's wife, she is one of the Valie

Manwe - Lord of the Valar, King of Arda and of the Air. He is closest to Illuvatar.

Melkor - one of the Valar, brother of Manwe, who rose up against the Valar, Illuvatar and all the races of Arda.

Ungoliant - an evil creature who came from the Avathar and whose venom sucked the life and light from the Two Trees of Valinor.

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Disclaimer: All familiar characters are owned by JRR Tolkien and are used without permission. No monies are being made from this work.
Painting is taken from John William Waterhouse's "Miranda", 1875.

Graphics copyrighted Cari Buziak