Betaed by Skippyscatt

~ * ~

Heero grumbled as he climbed into the car. "If we don't get going, we're going to be gone all day. I want to hear what Dr. Terry has to say about Duo. And . . . "

Relena waggled her cell phone at Heero. "I'll call him in an hour. He won't tell me much but he will tell me if there's anything to be concerned about. Now, lighten up and let's enjoy the day . . . please?"

Heero checked his arms again and then shrugged to settle his harness. "Ok. I'll lighten up. But you're not dragging me through every high class toggery in the mall. I have orders from Duo, exactly where to take you. So . . . and mind me. If I say no that means no. got it?"

Relena didn't even bother to pout. She was just happy to be shopping without a gaggle of uniformed and highly visible Preventers officers hounding her.

Heero looked out the window and worried at his lower lip.

"Heero. Heero?" Relena gave up. "HEEEEEERROOO!!!!" Heero jumped a foot. "Welcome back. Heero, what's got you so upset?"

Heero shrugged. "I don't like you going off without security." Heero held up a hand before Relena could fuss at him. "I know, you want to do things like a normal girl. But I can't help worrying. And what if the paparazzi get wind of this?"

"Let them. I'm tired of worrying about them. Let them make up their nasty little stories. The only people who read that tripe are uncultured asses anyway. Stop the fussing and let's have fun."

Heero shrugged. "Ok. Have fun. How do you do that?"

Relena gave Heero an open mouthed, horrified look. Heero grinned at her and snickered.

"Oh . . . you!" Relena swatted him on the leg and laughed back.

~ * ~

The car pulled into the parking garage and let them out at the basement door. Heero took a deep breath and resolved to make Duo proud of him.

He opened the door and scrambled out then turned to help Relena. He couldn't help but smile, she looked cute in Duo's jeans and t-shirt. And changing her hair had really changed her look.

"Hold my hand." Relena gave Heero a funny look but took his hand.

"Ok. Now what?"

"We go shopping."

Heero led Relena into the mall, hoping they looked like any one of the hundreds of other couples in the mall.

They walked around for a little while with Heero checking out the security and Relena widow shopping.

Relena sighed. Then she stepped behind a large planter, into the nook created by it and a wall. She snarled ‘don't look' at Heero and stuck her hand up her shirt and pulled at her bra.

Heero hadn't looked but he'd seen her in the faint reflection on the polished side of the planter.

"What's wrong?"

"This damn thing keeps riding up on me. I hate it. And I'm falling out the top too."

Heero turned around and got an eyeful. Relena was trying to pull the bra down, while keeping enough cup up to cover herself comfortably. Heero didn't see how two scraps of lace and some wire and elastic could possibly be comfortable.

"Why do you wear something like that if it's not comfortable? It doesn't make sense."

Relena sighed and explained that all her under wear came from a chain store who gave it to her for the advertising. She also admitted that she didn't like most of it. It was sexy, but uncomfortable. Every thing matched, slips, panties, bras garter belts, everything. And she disliked most of it.

Heero glanced around looking for a certain store. He saw it and hauled Relena in its general direction. Relena took one look and hurried to keep up.

Heero walked into Victoria's Secret and looked around with dilated eyes. How could women wear some of this stuff? It looked impractical, uncomfortable and to his eyes totally not sexy.

Relena pulled at his arm. "This is where most of my stuff comes from. Why are we here?"

Heero's answer was practical. "They have all your sizes. All you have to do is pick out what you want and have it delivered. Just put your foot down."

"I tried that once. They didn't listen. I picked out what I wanted from a catalogue and I got . . . got . . . butt floss. I can't even wear it."

Heero gave the approaching saleswoman a warning glare. And he was just getting warmed up.

She recognized Relena at once and started in gushing, Relena grimaced. The saleswoman led Relena into a back room with a couch and chair set on either end of a coffee table. She told Relena to wait and she would bring her a selection of the newest products. Heero raised an eye brow and Relena mouthed ‘every time' he snorted.

The woman came back with a selection of scraps of lace and elastic that made Heero blink. None of it looked practical, comfortable or even recognizable. Relena rejected it all with a short "not what I want."

The saleswoman appealed to Heero. "It's all very sexy, don't you think?"

Heero eyed a bit of black lace. "What the hell is that? I'm not sure I recognize any of this."

"They're panties. A thong. Don't you like it?" the saleswoman looked aghast. Here was a man who was obviously sex on two feet and he didn't like any of this?

"I'm queer. What do I know?"

Relena made a soft sound.

The saleswoman smiled stiffly. "Well, so you're a little eccentric. That doesn't mean you don't like sexy things, does it?"

Heero gave the woman a look that plainly said ‘don't mess with me'. "I'm not eccentric, I'm crazy. At lest my shrink says I'm functional now. And I'm gay, homosexual. Not interested in women? And Relena is my friend. I wouldn't like for her to be uncomfortable anymore."

Heero pinned the poor woman with a glare that could strip paint off a shuttle at forty yards. She paled and gulped.

"I see. Well . . . um . . . what do you think she would like?"

"Cotton. White, beige, black. Not pink, or baby blue, or that stupid green that babies wear. Full cut. No butt floss. And the bra needs to be."

Heero flicked a bit of something or other with one finger.

"I'm sorry? Needs to be what?" Heero glared again. "Sir?"

"It needs to be. In that it should be visible, cover more than an inch of her breast, and not cut her into bits. Look here."

Heero reached out and pulled the neck of Relena's t-shirt aside, showing the sales woman where the spaghetti strap had cut into her shoulder. Relena smacked his hand causing him to laugh at her.

The woman gave up.

"Well, since you have such definite ideas of what Lady Relena should wear, why don't you come out into the store proper and show me."

So Heero did. He walked up and down the isles picking out what he thought looked comfortable and practical. He ignored garter belts and chose elastic topped stockings instead. Everything was made of cotton and plain as he could find. When he was done, the saleswoman had an arm full of bras, panties and slips.

Relena eyed the pile of things with a thoroughly jaundiced eye. She was already tired of the whole thing. She should like shopping; other girls her age loved it, but she always found it a trial of her patience as people told her what she should like and shouldn't. It was a waste of her time.

Heero took the first set from the waiting saleswoman and showed it to Relena. She blinked, this was more like it. It looked comfortable.

Heero handed her the plain white bra and pantie set and stuffed her in the changing room. "Try that on. I've got the same set in black, that pasty color . . . sort of brown. And a couple of other colors. And there's some sports bras. And a slip. . . why do you wear something like that."

"The color is beige. I wear a slip to keep from showing a silhouette in the sun and it keeps static electricity from making your . . . My dress . . . stick to me." Relena's voice was somewhat muffled by the t-shirt she was pulling off.

Heero listened to further rustling noises and some muttering. Then Relena came out fully clothed with a handful of scraps of lace. She handed these to the saleswoman.

"Pitch these. And if you ever send me any more of that crap I'll find someone else to do business with. If I need special foundations for a piece of clothing, I'll let you know. My everyday things had better be comfortable or I'll send them back. Got me?"

The sales woman sputtered for a moment then managed to voice her objections. "But my lady. It's unsuitable. A woman of your stature should wear only the finest of merchandise. What will people think if they find out that you're wearing . . . cotton?"

Relena raised an eye brow. "That I'm comfortable? That I have more sense than to be influenced by fad? That I have a brain of my own. Which I'm finally using, thanks to Heero." She tossed through the arm full of garments the woman still held. "No . . . no . . . ugh . . . sucky . . . yes . . . oooo cute . . . not a chance in hell . . . this is good . . . and this . . . and these." Relena dropped the rejects one by one on the table, the things she found acceptable she handed to Heero. He just took them with a rather smug look on his face. "Ring me up. Oh, here's the tags from what I'm wearing."

The woman gave Heero a nasty look. "And what do you know about women's underwear that you could pick her so many things she liked?"

Heero shrugged. "Beats me. I just picked stuff I'd wear if I was a girl. I . . . " Heero gave the woman a considering look.

Relena snickered. "Well, that does beat all as nanny would say. You never even wore underwear for years. That goes to prove that you . . ." Relena snickered. ". . . Are the perfect soldier. You know stuff you don't even know you know."

Heero snickered at Relena, then they both cracked up completely. The look on the woman's face was priceless.

After ringing up and making arrangements to have the purchases delivered to the Residence they headed back into the mall.

~ * ~

Relena stopped walking, glanced at her watch and pulled out her phone.

"Wait a sec. I'm going to call Dr. Terry."

Heero waited while Relena talked to the doctor.

"Well, Duo's upset because someone ruffied me. Seems he's added me to his gang and any threat to his gang makes him go all . . . pissy. The doctor says he'll be ok, he just has to recognize that he can't do anything about this. My security is really good, there was just a . . . hiccup. Dr. Terry says that he'll be fine in a little while, now that he knows why he's upset. Duo that is not Dr. Terry. Oh hell. Well, you know what I mean."

Heero frowned for a second until he got Relena's rather convoluted sentence unraveled. He understood at last. He remembered the other times Duo had gone Shinigami. Both times someone had hurt one of ‘his' people.

"He's getting better. If I remember correctly, the last time he got this upset, he. . . .um . . . stepped on someone. In Deathsythe. Caused a real mess."

Relena wrinkled her nose. "Ugh. That's a mental picture I could have lived without . . . but he's no worse than Milli . . . Zechs . . . or you. You're both just . . . quieter about it." She stuffed her phone into the pocket she'd pulled it out of. "Come on. Let's finish up, maybe we can get some snacks later. Ok?"

Heero just nodded. He liked snacks more than he'd thought he would. Duo had taught him a great deal in the few months between the end of the war and the beginning of his incarceration. Mostly fun things like, how to eat a cream egg, which movies were guaranteed to be boring; things he'd never experienced before.

Heero kept scanning the mall, flinching slightly at loud noises and people popping out of stores.

"Heero, calm down. What's got you so rattled."

"I'm not sure. One, you should have more security. And two, I'm not supposed to be here without a WEI uniform and Duo. I'm in his custody until further notice. Or my sentence runs out."

Relena snickered. "Well, you're in my custody. But I've seen you out in civvies."

Heero shrugged. "I was with Duo at your party on private property, the club is private property and the warehouse is WEI property. This is public as hell. So I'm jumpy."

Relena smiled gently. "I see. Well then, a disguise is in order. Come on."

Heero followed willingly enough and when he saw where they were going he snickered a little. "You know, Duo got banned from the whole chain of ‘Odds and Ends'. They say he stole every bit of everything he used during the war from them."

Relena snorted. "Duo has much better taste than to even steal from them. But they're cheap and nearly every kid our age has something of theirs. So" Relena picked a hat off a rack and plopped it on Heero's head. But instead of pulling it down over his eyes, she set it on the back of his head. "There. Now you need . . ." Relena reached out and pulled Heero's t-shirt out of his jeans. "Ok. And . . . oh, I want that necklace and the bracelet that matches." She tugged the tags off and donned the jewelry. Heero took the tags to the register and paid for them.

The checker had been eyeing them askance but when Heero handed her the tags she smiled at him.

"Heero Winner-Yuy? You any relation to Quatre Winner?"

Heero shrugged. "Shirt tail cousin of some sort or other. Mother's sister's husband's aunt's something or other. You know how it is."

The clerk handed Heero back his credit card and grinned. "Sure do, sugar. I'm from Georgia and I got cousins from here to hells half acre and back." She started to hand Heero the tags then grinned and tossed them in the trash. "Have a nice day, Mr. Yuy."

Heero blinked once then grinned. "I plan to. Thank you." He glanced at Relena, who was fiddling with her scrunchie. "What do you think?"

"Sugar, I think you look like a couple of high school kids out playing hooky. You'll do fine."

Heero nodded once then rejoined Relena.

"The lady recognized me. But she said we look like high school kids. What do you think?" Heero shook his head. "I'm not sure why she recognized me. Do you know?"

Relena snickered. "You stand like you're being put on report or something. Slouch a little." Heero let his shoulders slump slightly. "Yeah. That's much better."

They left the store and wandered around a while. Heero watched couples closely for a while.

"You should put your hand in my pocket."

Relena yelped, "What!? Heero, what . . . you're . . . we're . . . Duo will . . . no!!!"

Heero shrugged. "We're under cover. Duo won't mind. He'll understand completely."

"Heero Yuy. I'll do no such thing. It's undignified and . . . and . . . Duo will go all Shinigami on me. You just wait and see. Or don't. Cause I'm not doin' it."

Heero just put her where he wanted her, put his arm around her and stuck his hand in her back pocket. Relena jumped a foot. Heero pointed to another couple a little older than they. They were walking along with a hand in each other's back pockets. No one was paying any attention.

"We look like that. Or we stick out. Which will it be?"

Relena decided that she was going to take the chance to do something she'd always wanted to do without getting into a mess. So she stuck her hand into Heero's back pocket. The only thing she could think was, ‘Oh, my god, he really does have buns of steel. Duo is so going to be pissed.'

Heero wondered if Relena was very out of shape, her buttock was very soft. Too soft if you asked him.

They continued to walk around the mall, Relena window shopping and Heero trying to relax. He was feeling better when there was a loud bang. Heero's reflexes identified ‘.22 long rifle' and took over. He pushed Relena behind him and started to draw his pistol. Relena grabbed his arm and dragged on it.

"No. Heero. Stop!" Heero was bracing against Relena trying to push her into the wall without hurting her. "It's the construction. Look." Heero looked where Relena was pointing. He saw a man fiddling with a piece of equipment. Then he tapped one part of it against the floor and there was another explosion.

Heero didn't even flinch this time. "What the hell is that?"

Relena shook her head. "I don't have a clue. Why don't we go over and ask someone?"

Heero thought about that then smiled a little "Sure, why not. Let's go."

So they went over and stopped one of the men who was carrying lumber to the site and Heero asked about the equipment. The man explained that the thing was a stud setter which used a blank .22 cartridge to nail floor studs to concrete. Heero blinked, he'd never heard of such a thing.

"If you're from the colonies, they don't use them. Too much pollution. The gunpowder mucks up the scrubbers . . . you kids better go on along. The boss is coming and I better get back to work."

Heero thanked the man and led Relena away. "Well, that went well."

Heero gave Relena a sharp look. "I nearly drew down on a construction worker."

"But you didn't. The minute you realized there was no threat you backed off. Before you'd have shot the man before I could have stopped you. I think you're doing quite well."

Heero gave her a doubtful look but she nodded encouragingly and poked him in the stomach. "Come on. I want that pair of boots Duo told me about."

~ * ~

Heero shuddered, Relena in combat boots wasn't something he was sure about. But Relena chattered about how she wanted boots; so boots she would get. He'd just have to make sure that they were practical, not stylish. He couldn't understand how something as practical as boots could be such a matter of contention.

Relena poked Heero in the side and pointed. "Is that the store that Duo was telling us about?"

Heero looked. "Yeah. Come on. I want to get you out of those sneaks before they blister your feet."

Relena grimaced. Duos' old sneakers hadn't fit her that well, and padding them with an extra pair of socks hadn't helped. "I think we're too late."

Heero grumbled, "I told you both that that trick didn't work. But neither of you will listen. So . . . let's go in and see if they've got a blister kit."

They entered the store and Heero quickly led Relena to the seating area and knelt to pull off her shoes. A clerk walked over to help and smiled at the picture of a concerned boy friend kneeling at his girlfriend's feet.

"Hi. Um . . . I'll do that. It's my job after all."

Heero didn't look up from examining Relena's foot. "She's getting a blister. Do you have a blister kit?"

"Sure thing. I'll go get one. My name's Joe, by the way."

Heero only grunted, making Relena roll her eyes at Joe. He just snickered a little and went to get the kit.

Heero poked and prodded at Relena's foot and decided that it was just a hot spot. He took the kit from Joe, opened the little packet of cream and rubbed some on the spot. Then he took out a piece of mole skin and stuck it on.

Relena wrinkled her nose. "What's that? It feels funny."

"Mole skin."

Relena yelped and jerked her foot out of Heero's grasp. "Mole skin. Ugh! Take it off."

Heero gave Relena a look that could only be described as ‘deer in the headlights' then he laughed softly. "It's not really mole's skin. That's just what they call it. It'll keep anything from rubbing on your foot and making that hot spot worse."

"Oh, well . . . ok then. But . . . what should I do?"

Heero stood up and moved to the display of hiking boots. "Buy something that fits." He started picking up different styles, but he put them all back down again. He turned to Relena. "Would you please come here and look. I don't have a clue what you might like."

Relena flushed. "I'm barefooted."

Heero gave her a blank look. "So? The floor's carpeted. It's not like you've never gone . . . you never have, have you?"

"No. Not even from the bathroom to the bedroom. I always had slippers on." Relena walked over to Heero and took the boot from him. She examined it, but shook her head. "I'd rather have a low top I think."

Relena started picking over the boots herself. Heero realized that Relena was like her mother, a serious shopper. She was going to go over every boot that looked like it fit her requirements with a fine tooth comb. He settled himself down to wait. Joe came over and started doing his job.

"Here's a nice pair. They have a rolled stone collar. It's nice if you hike in the mountains. But if you want them more for street wear, try these. Relena Peacecraft has two pairs."

Relena goggled at the man. She didn't remember even owning more than one pair of any kind of hiking boot and she was sure they weren't pink and grey.

She blinked for a second then gave an exaggerated little squeak. Heero gave her a sharp look but, as she didn't seem to be in any danger, let her handle things on her own.

"Oh, sugar. I forgot. Excuse me. I have to make a quick call. I'll be right back."

Relena stepped far enough away that Joe couldn't hear, then called Dorothy.

"Doro. Do I own any boots made by . . . " Relena told Dorothy the name of the boot maker.

Dorothy replied almost at once. "Yes. But the boots they sent were the wrong size and shoddy. So they're in the back of your closet. Why?"

Relena told her. "Dorothy, no more of that. If I don't actually use the product, do not let them use my name. Do I make myself clear?"

Dorothy smiled. "Yes, ma'am. And I don't do it. Your dresser does. You want me to have a little talk with her?"

"Sorry, Doro. I should have known better. And no, I don't want you to have a little talk with her. Have a big one. Include the word termination in there somewhere . . . thanks. Bye."

Relena snapped her phone shut and went back to Joe.

"I have it on good authority that she has them but never wears them as the construction is shoddy and they don't fit. So . . . and I really hate pink."

Joe shook his head. "You seem like a smart lady. You wouldn't believe how many girls are wearing those damn boots just because Peacecraft has them."

Relena wrinkled her nose. "Yes I would. But there are some changes being made . . . I like these." Relena picked up a boot. It was dark brown with black nylon gussets, of medium height with a stone collar. "I don't quite know my size. These boots seem to be different from shoes."

"That why your sneaks don't fit?"

Relena shook her head. "Those aren't mine. I wound up at their house without casual shoes. They belong to a friend of mine. Please be sure that you get them boxed up. I'll try these."

Relena returned to Heero and sat down beside him. "I want you to be sure that my boots fit right. Please?"

Heero just nodded. "Be sure there's no wrinkles in your socks. You'll get a blister if you don't."

~ * ~

Relena decided that she liked the boots and, after Heero made sure they fit correctly, she bought them. Joe packed the sneakers in the boot box and agreed to have them delivered. When she gave the address, he stared at her for a second then shrugged.

Heero led Relena back into the mall and toward the other sporting goods store. The one that sold the clothing Duo told Heero to help her find. This was going to be interesting.

Relena stopped to look in the window of a toy store. Heero stood behind her and eyed the large hoop in the display.

"What the hell is that?"

"It's a hula hoop. You . . . um . . ." Relena sighed. "I never got to have one. Nanny said it would wrinkle my dress too much. I'm not sure exactly what you do with it."

Heero looked in the window again. "Let's go in."

Relena shrugged and followed him through the door.

They walked down the wide aisles and found a display of the hoops. Heero took one out and examined it.

Relena wrinkled her nose in thought. "I think you put it around you and whirl it around your waist."

Heero flipped the hoop over his head and settled it around himself, he twirled it around his waist but inertia took its toll and it made a few circles then slowed and started dropping toward the floor.

"Doesn't seem like much fun to me. You have to keep picking it up and starting it again." Heero looked a Relena who shrugged.

"Don't look at me. I haven't a clue."

A rather shrill voice from more or less waist level announced. "You guys don't know anything, do you. You don't throw it around like that. You . . . um . . . sorta . . ."

Heero and Relena looked down at a small girl about eight years old. She was standing with her hands on her hips looking up at them with all the contempt that a child her age could muster.
Heero squatted to bring himself to her level "Well, why don't you show us. I never got to learn."

"You shoulda asked your dad for one."

Heero managed a small sad sigh, which was easier than he'd thought it would be. "I don't have a dad. Well, I did, but I never knew him. I'm an orphan."

"Oh. . . well, that splains it. Sucks. What about you?" she turned accusing eyes to Relena.

"I'm rich. Nanny was afraid she'd get in trouble if I wrinkled my dress. That sucks major too. Show us? Please?"

"Sure. Here . . . I don't want that one. It's pink. Pink is for sissies. I'm a tomboy."

The child picked out a green and white hoop and showed them how to make it work. Heero got the hang of it at once and merrily swiveled his hips, keeping the hoop going. He realized that it was just like the silver hoops he'd seen Trowa use in his act. Only he'd never seen Trowa do this. He only jumped through them.

Relena had a little more trouble but the girl, with surprising patience, kept showing her until she got it too.

"Marjorie, what are you doing young lady. You know you're not supposed to talk to strangers. Come here."

The little girl sighed, "Well shoot. Mom's gonna have a tizzy. I'm not supposed to get away from her in stores. She'll rag on me forever."

Heero quickly gathered up the hoops and put them away. "I'm sorry, ma'am. But she was just showing us how to . . . hulas? Neither of us got to learn. Please don't be mad at her."

The woman sighed and took Marjorie's hand. "I'm not mad, exactly. I was scared when I turned around and she was gone. Your parents would have been the same. I'm . . ." Marjorie tugged at her mother's hand. "Maggie, I'm talking to the man. What do you want?"

"I need to whisper." Marjorie turned to Heero and Relena. "‘Scuse us please." When her mother bent down, she whispered in a youthful and carrying voice. "He's a orphan. He don't know. You shouldn't make him feel sad like that."

"Oh, dear. I'm sorry. I . . ."

Heero smiled. "It's ok. How are you supposed to know?"

"Well . . . all right. But you don't understand the dangers. If you'd been a bad person . . . or . . . I'm sorry . . . a pervert of some kind, it could have turned out very bad. You understand?"

Heero blinked slowly. "I do. And I'm not about to argue with you. But if you notice . . ." Heero pointed to the ceiling. "The security is manned. No one is getting out of the store with a child they didn't come in with. Alarms will go off and that man standing near the door? He'll have hold of whoever it is in a second. Just ask the clerk . . . but I'm glad to see you so concerned."

Relena smiled and held out her hand. "I'm happy to meet you. Please, thank you for allowing your daughter to teach us to . . . er . . . Hoop?"

Heero met Relena's eyes, it didn't take long for mother and daughter to join them in merry laughter.

They bid the two good-bye and left the store, under the watchful eye of the security man.

~ * ~

Relena leaned into Heero as they walked to the next store.

"That was fun. I'm going to have several of those delivered to the Residence. I can play with it in the small ball room. There's plenty of space."

Heero nodded. "I want one too. Get me one please. Or several. I want to see Zechs and Chang try one." They both snickered over the idea as they entered the store.

Relena looked around and smiled, the clothing looked so comfortable.

Heero gave the place a quick shake down and decided that it was safe. He started browsing the racks himself. He really needed a new pair of black BDU's, but he knew the things here wouldn't meet his specifications. He was looking for black jeans instead.

Heero shuffled things around on the racks but didn't find anything he liked. He decided to requisition something from WEI then went in search of Relena.

He found her in the back of the store. She was holding a yellow canvas shirt with a doubtful look on her face.

"It's really the newest style. You'll look stunning in it." The sales lady was really pouring it on. The shirt was a disgusting mustard yellow. Heero saw at once that Relena should burn it instead of wearing it.

"You'll look washed out in that. You can't wear yellow . . . or pink . . . or beige. Jewel tones. I remember."

Relena held the shirt up to her chest and glanced in the mirror, she looked horrible. "I don't like it. And I don't think I like you much either. You lied to me to make a sale. Could you please get someone else to wait on me? Thank you." Relena waved the woman a way without thinking. She wandered off without even noticing the woman's hard expression. Heero gave her a glare and followed Relena.

Relena went to the rack of shirts and picked out a red one, then she found a bright blue one, and a green one. Heero wondered if she'd buy one of every color that she liked.

"I don't think I'll buy more that these three. I saw some really nice flannel in plaids. But these are a little too light weight. I'd like something heavier. You think?"

Heero fingered the material, it was a light weight canvas. "I think you'd be better off to layer. That way you can take off stuff if you get too warm and add another layer without getting bound up in the armpits." Relena snickered. "What? It's true. And I . . . Relena!"

But Relena was off in another snicker fit, Heero gave her a disgusted look and went to find some thermal Henleys for her to try.

After giggling some more, Relena tried the shirt on over what she had on now. It fit fairly well, but seemed a little too large. Heero returned to her with some knitted shirts and told her to go into the fitting room and try on a pair of jeans, one of the undershirts, and an over shirt.

She obeyed and found that she liked the dark grey cargo pants, lighter grey Henley and ruby red shirt. They were comfortable without being baggy or binding. She settled on wearing them out of the store before she even left the fitting room.

Heero eyed Relena when she came out of the fitting room, then he nodded his head and grunted. "Umph, Duo was right. Here, see what you think."

Heero had lain out several flannel shirts in various weights. Relena picked a Black Watch plaid, and several other plaid and solid shirts, then she picked jeans and cargoes. All together she picked out ten pairs of pants and as many shirts. She paid for them and again arranged to have things delivered to the Residence.

"Well, that takes care of that. What do you want to do now?"

Heero shrugged. "How about just walking around for a little while. We might find something one of us wants."

Relena shrugged "Ok, I never get to just walk around somewhere. I always have some sort of agenda or other. It will be nice."

Relena tugged at Heero, he let her lead him, enjoying the lack of anything important to do.

~ * ~

A sudden boinging noise made Relena jump, Heero just turned his head. The arcade was just around the corner. He decided to take Relena in, she might like some of the games.

"It's an arcade. Duo loves them. We used to sneak in one once in a while. If we weren't dodging Oz bullets . . . or you."

Relena sighed. "I said I was sorry."

Heero pinched her gently in the side. "Truth, not blame. We all did what we did."

Relena looked around. It was dim but not dark. There were no over head lights, all the light came from the games and a few can lights dropped down from the ceiling. There weren't many people in the arcade at this time of day, so there were plenty of games open.

Relena stopped by a game and eyed it. "What does that do? All it has is a . . . what is that?"

Heero glanced at it. "It's a grip tester. You squeeze that handle and it tells you how good your grip is. Want to try it?"

Heero produced a debit card and swiped it through the token machine. The unit obligingly gave an electronic cough and dispensed tokens. Heero gathered them up and handed some to Relena.

"Put a coin in the machine, take hold of the grip and squeeze. It'll tell you how hard you can grip."

Relena plugged in some tokens and took hold of the grip. The machine bonged and she squeezed. She giggled as the screen displayed, "Not so good. Hope you're a girl."

"That's sexist." Relena made a mocking face and tried again. She got a little better results this time, but she was still on the bottom of average. Heero had to snicker at her disappointed expression.

"Ok, mister. You're so smug, let's see what you can do."

Heero shrugged, stuffed tokens in the slot and waited for the signal. When he squeezed the handle the machine blanked out, but not before it registered over two hundred and fifty ppsi. As high as it would register.

Relena blinked. "Heero, I think you broke it."

"Yeah. J had to have a special one made for me. It went up to a thousand pounds." Relena gave Heero an astonished look. "I never actually got that high, but I got close."

"Oh . . . um . . . wow." Relena smiled. "Well, um."

Heero went to report the broken machine to the manager. He returned to Relena and started to lead her back out the door. But Relena saw a sign on the back wall that showed Wing Zero.

"Is this where the Gundam game is? I want to try it." Relena looked eager. Heero pointed.

"Through there. It's in a stadium now. Lot's of people like to watch, even if they don't play."

"Well, come on. I want to see it at least. Maybe if there's no line, you could . . . give me a demonstration? Or something."

Heero led the way through the room and into the stadium. They were stopped at the door.

"Watching or playing."

Heero glanced into the room and saw that the last player was just now falling out of the game, sweating and groaning.

"I'm playing. She might, if you can set it for a raw recruit."

"Sure thing . . . um . . . you're 05, right?"

Heero shook his head. "No, that's Chang. I'm 01. Why?"

"Just wondered. I'll set you up in just a sec. Go ahead and get the girlie . . ."

Heero pinned the man with a glare that made him make a noise suspiciously like ‘ulp'.

"She's . . . no female should be disrespected that way. You may call her Miss."

Heero led Relena away to get her seated in the waiting section. He decided that she could at least try the game.

It didn't take long for the game to be set up, Heero settled in the pilot's seat and the entire audience seemed to be on their feet. Heero put on his usual show of skill and dexterity.

Relena gasped and moaned and cheered along with all the other spectators.

Heero stepped out of the machine, wiped his hands on his pants and looked at his score. It read, "Congratulations you are a Gundam pilot." He smirked.

Relena was up next. There seemed to be a dearth of willing combatants, Heero thought he knew why. It was a lot harder to actually fight a Gundam than it would seem. He helped Relena strap in and checked to make sure that the game was on its lightest setting. Then he closed the door and went to sit in the first row.

It didn't take long for Relena to get into trouble. She didn't seem to know left from right. And she certainly didn't know up from down. She used up all three lives in less than five minutes. When she emerged from the game, she was sweating and gasping.

"Oh, my god. That was horrible, they were everywhere. Like . . . cockroaches on L2, as Duo would say. I don't know how you did it."

Heero handed her a bottle of water and helped her sit down. "We did what we had to do. It's the price we paid for peace. Take another drink, then I want something to eat. If you're done shopping, we could go to the food court. Ok?"

Relena shivered. "Ohhh. Goose walked on my grave. I'll be ok in a sec. Then I want food too. But what should we have?"

Heero thought for a moment. "Why don't we call Duo and ask him what we should have? I'm sure he warned me about some of the stuff we would find. A long time ago. And I don't remember exactly what he said we shouldn't eat. Come on. That . . . guy is going to come over and ask a bunch of questions that I'm sure I don't want to have to try to answer."

"Why not?" Relena gave Heero a puzzled look.

"Most people want to ask about my training, or just generally ask some stupid question that the answer to is either classified or nasty. You know. Did you ever get caught? Do you regret your actions? Did you kill my son/daughter/husband? . . . And the answers never satisfy them. I avoid that kind of stuff if it's at all possible."

Heero had been hustling Relena as gently as possible toward the exit as he spoke. Relena had started to resist but when she understood his answer, she cooperated. They made it out the exit without incident. They didn't see the doorman make a call on his phone.

~ * ~

Relena called Duo, who apologized for being what he called a royal butt. When Relena told him what she wanted he snickered. His advice was simple. "If it smells greasy, it is really going to be. Don't eat anything you can't pronounce properly. Don't eat any meat salad made with mayo, ya never know how fresh it is. And don't let Heero eat too much. He's miserable if his belly is too full and it makes him cranky. A cranky Heero is a trigger-happy Heero. Have fun and don't worry about anything. I'm ok, I got a handle on it now. Good thing I didn't go with. I'd have probably shot someone. Dr. Terry says I'm really territorial with my friends. Give Heero a kiss for me. Bye.

Duo rang off and Relena took a deep breath. She sometimes felt that a call with Duo was as exhausting as a day in negotiations. He was a bit of a ‘steamroller'. She wondered how he could talk like that. He had to breathe she was sure, she just wasn't sure when or how he did it.

Heero took in her slightly stunned expression with amusement. "I swear he breathes through his ears when he gets started. How is he? He didn't ask to speak to me?"

Relena shook her head. "No. He seems fine. I need to think about some of what he said. If I can translate Duo into English. He didn't ask to talk to you, but he did give me instructions. Let's go eat. I'm starving."

Heero was about to feel hurt that Duo didn't want to talk to him when his phone rang. "Hey, ‘Ro. Love ya. Sorry I was a butt earlier. Relena tell you about it?" Heero grunted. "Good, good. And thanks for not making a fuss about going to the mall. I'd have done it . . ."

"You had no business here in that mood. Never mind. Love you. Dr. Terry makes sense, doesn't he?"

Duo laughed softly. "Seems I'm a territorial bastard. So . . . take care of the lady and have fun. See you soon . . . bye."

Heero folded his phone and pocketed it. "Let's go."

They headed for the food court and lunch.

~ * ~

Heero grinned at Relena. "It's a hot dog. And those are chili cheese fries. This is . . ."

Relena blew through her straw to shoot the paper cover at Heero. "I know what a soda is. I just never saw anything like this before."

Heero laughed. "All the food groups. Fat, salt and starch. Greasy meat covered in mustard and pickle relish. And fried potatoes with bean filled chili and melted cheese. We'll be queasy for hours. Fun."

Relena snorted. "Yeah. Real fun. If you get sick, I'm not rubbing your stomach. Hand me the ketchup."

Heero looked blank. "Not . . . ok . . . I guess?"

Relena snickered. "You mean to tell me no one ever rubbed your stomach when it was upset."

Heero shook his head. "No. In fact, the last time I had an upset stomach, J. punished me for eating what had upset it."

Relena made a face. "Nasty man. Here try this." She stuck a chili cheese fry dripping catsup at Heero. He obediently opened his mouth and tried it.

"Mmmm. Goo', ‘s ‘ot."

Relena snickered at Heero's attempt to talk with a mouth full of hot, cheesy French fry. "Don't talk with your mouth full. You'll choke."

Heero grinned and stuffed another fry into his mouth. Relena helped herself to another and dipped it into the chili. As they ate, they both looked around, enjoying the opportunity to just be themselves.

After wiping the last of the chili cheese off the cardboard ‘basket' they tossed the messy papers into the trash and finished their soda standing by the trash can.

~ * ~

Relena looked over Heero's shoulder and groaned. "Oh hell. Look who's here. The Rodent himself. Hide me."

Heero turned around to see a skinny, sandy haired boy/man coming toward them at a fast walk. He was already whining.

"Miss Relena, you shouldn't be here. This mall is so common. I'm only here because Mother's upstairs maid saw you and recognized you."

"Robert." Relena's flat voice and one word salutation surprised Heero. It was as near to rude as he'd ever seen Relena.

"Come along with me. Mummie told me to bring you home at once." Robert reached out to take hold of Relena. She dodged his hand with obvious distaste.

"I will not. I'm with an escort of unimpeachable qualifications. Don't touch me." Relena backed up, putting her hands behind her back. She really didn't want Robert touching her. His hands were so clammy as to qualify as wet.

Robert finally grabbed Relena by the wrist, she pulled back, but Robert was just strong enough that she couldn't get away. She made a soft whimpering sound that went straight to Heero's nervous system.

Heero reached out and caught Robert by the offending wrist. He found the bundle of nerves there without even thinking about it. He pressed it and Robert had no choice but to let go of Relena. He jerked on his now throbbing arm, but Heero held on with no effort at all. Robert jerked again and yelped as his own movements put more pressure on the nerves. Heero gave him a bland look.

"You want to stop that any time soon? . . . I can hold on all day." Robert's continued struggles didn't even move Heero, it was like struggling against a stone statue.

"Who are you? Let go of me? Miss Relena doesn't have proper security, she should be with at least four security men, or at home, as is proper."

Relena snorted. "I'll have you know that Heero is better security than a dozen other men. And I refuse to stay home." Relena turned to Heero. "And don't you dare turn loose of him. He'll grab me again and his hands are all sweaty. Yuck!"

Heero just nodded. "I'll hold him until you tell me to let go. What do you plan to do about him?"

Relena smiled slyly. "I'm calling mall security on my cell. I'm tired of putting up with him. I wonder how hard it would be to get a restraining order. I really do feel like he's stalking me."

Robert made an indignant noise but Heero's glare had shut up braver men than he. He sputtered for a second, then gave up the struggle to get free of Heero's iron grip and just stood still and silent.

Relena made her call and security turned up almost immediately, Heero was impressed. Someone had recognized Relena or him and followed them, possibly with the mall's security camera system.

The security men listened to Relena as she explained that Robert was following them, trying to touch her and generally making a nuisance of himself. They took him away to where Heero neither knew nor cared.

"Who is that? He's . . . clammy. I think I need to wash my hands." Heero eyed his open hand with a slightly disgusted expression.

Relena produced a small bottle of anti-bacterial gel and squeezed some into her palm then passed it to Heero who followed suit. They both rubbed the stuff in and Heero handed Relena his handkerchief. She wiped her hands on it then handed it back to Heero who used it as well.

Relena plopped back down on her chair and grumbled. "The congress has been trying to get me to marry. I don't want to get married just yet. You realize that I'm not even eighteen yet? And they want me to produce an heir as soon as possible. Well, if that's the . . ." Heero interrupted her.

"Do not tell me they want you to marry that . . . sweaty, skinny, abomination. That's . . . ridiculous. He's not fit to . . ." Heero trailed off as Relena nodded her head.

"Yup. They want me to marry that greasy little weasel or someone else just as bad. Excuse me. I am going to call a judge and get a restraining order against him. I refuse to put up with him . . . mauling me. Some of the others are just as bad. . . . wonder if . . . well . . . never mind."

Heero made a face. "No wonder you're so ‘boy shy'. Who the hell had that idiotic idea?"

Relena shrugged. "Not a clue. But members of the congress have been after me for . . . well . . . not exactly years but quite a while . . . since the end of the war, to get married, have children. Create a new generation of Peacecrafts. Yada, yada, yada." Relena addressed someone on her phone, nodded with satisfaction and hung up. "Well, that takes care of that. I've got a permanent order against him, his mother and his aunt. They're all nuances"

Heero nibbled at his lower lip for a moment. "Perhaps it's not the men so much as it is the wives. Some of those women seem to abhor unattached young women of any rank. And having you as a distraction to their son's can't be easy for those who want to marry off their kids. You distract the boys and show up the girls."

Relena made a rude noise, but Heero just nodded firmly and pulled her out of her chair. He pointed her in the general direction of a door. All he wanted to do was get her out of the mall before something else happened.