Betaed by Skippyscatt

~ * ~

Duo sighed in relief, they'd just changed from one control tower to another. The change over hadn't been as bad as he'd expected it to be. Evidently someone had done some research. The new traffic controller was unabashedly glad to speak to Duo. Or Heero. He'd even settle for Wufei, if you could call it that.

All he wanted to know were the symptoms the crew displayed. Heero as copilot turned him over to acting First Officer Wufei. Wufei detailed the symptoms and waited to see if there were any more questions. He was told to wait and they would get back to him with a recommended course of treatment. Wufei sighed with relief. He had been worried about taking care of the crew until they reached their destination.

~ * ~

Zechs told the man to sit down for approximately the fifth time. His questions were becoming insistent and frankly quite bothersome. Other passengers were beginning to wonder the same things.

He decided to find out what was going on. Most of the questions were actually quite intelligent, if not couched in the most intelligent of ways. The one thing they couldn't afford on a plane this size was a panic. The plane was a wide body hemi. Business class alone held sixty people. The entire plane from first class, through business, economy and tourist held over four hundred souls.

Zechs tapped on the cockpit door, when Wufei answered the first thing he did was kiss him breathless. "I know you're busy. But . . . Wufei. Mmmm."

Wufei kissed back then gently put Zechs off him. "What's up? You didn't come up here just to play tonsil hockey with me."

"Questions. I need answers, the natives are getting restless and I really don't blame them."

Wufei nodded. "Coffee. Questions. Come in and sit."

Wufei handed Zechs a thermal cup of coffee and waited while he had a moment. Then Zechs asked his questions. Wufei answered them easily and smiled as Zechs took his time finishing his coffee.

"How's it going?"
"Not too bad." Zechs handed Wufei his cup. "Could be worse, I guess. Most of the people in economy were satisfied with ‘we have experienced people from first class in charge.' The business class is giving me fits. They're all upper middle management and think they're someone. First class can see what's going on and they're staying out of the way." Zechs rubbed his face and asked plaintively. "Can I please shoot someone?"

"No, love, won't do any good. It'll just scare everyone and probably puncture the skin. Duo won't like it."

Zechs sighed, heaved himself to his feet and grumbled. "Didn't think so. But a man has to have dreams."

Wufei sympathized and remarked that if they got too out of hand they could always send Heero back to keep order and let Zechs take copilot.

"Can't, I'm not qualified. I'm mobile suit only."

Wufei made a rueful face. "Sorry."

Zechs squared his shoulders, put on a mournful face. "Into the fray the four hundred."

Wufei laughed, shoved him out the door and shut it, saying, "Overly dramatic, I think. Go on."

Zechs was pounced on the minute he entered the class.

"Silence! Now!" Zechs glared at the men until they all sat down again.

"I'll only say this once. And I won't tolerate interruptions. If you have questions, hold them until after my announcement." He waited for a moment until everyone settled down to listen. "The people in charge are Gundam Pilots. They're all qualified to handle this plane. And don't give me grief about that. You want to pilot, prove you're qualified. I'll find a ‘chute and see you on the ground. As to why we don't land sooner. Simple . . . no airport large enough to handle this plane safely is closer than our original destination. So . . . we keep flying.

"As to whether the crew is contagious. We don't think so. We're keeping them semi-quarantined in first class just to be sure. The consensus is that they have food poisoning. Now any questions?"

There didn't seem to be so Zechs returned to the crew's tiny ready room and settled in to wait for the next crisis.

~ * ~

The stewards and stewardesses served the meal, handed out pillows and drinks. They did their best to give the illusion that the flight was normal. Most people settled in and did their best to believe them.
A few just couldn't stand the tension. The first one to break was a woman in economy. She got the screaming heeby-jeebies.

"Noooo! Nononono. Let me out. I have to get out of here. Open the door and let me out."

She jumped up and headed for the nearby door, the man seated behind her managed to tackle her and hold her until Zechs and the steward could make their way to them. The other passengers stayed in their seats, staring wide eyed. Zechs pried the woman out of the man's arms and held her until the steward could give her a shot. The air injection system hissed and she screamed and cried until the sedative took effect. Then she collapsed. Zechs turned her over to the steward, who carried her into the back of the plane and settled her in the stewardess' chair which doubled as a restraint chair. Zechs thanked the man for his help, shaking his calloused hand and slapping him on the back.

"Not a problem. I really don't want to be sucked out the door." He turned pleading eyes to Zechs. "We going to land ok, my lord?"

Zechs nodded, patting the man gently on the shoulder. "Yes, we are. They may be young but they're good. Maxwell wouldn't claim to be able to do something if he couldn't. It will be fine. I swear."

The man nodded, satisfied, and sat back in his seat.

The next bout of hysteria was even uglier. One of the business men decided that his small engine certification entitled him to barge into the cockpit and demand to take over.

Heero greeted him at the door with a glare and a gun.

"What do you want?"

"Let me in. I have a certification. I'll fly this plane. You're just a bunch of kids. This isn't the same as a simulation video game."

Heero lifted the muzzle of his side arm just enough to get the man's attention on it.

"I'm sure. And it's not a small, single engine either. You need to know how to handle six throttles at once. Go sit back in your seat."

A bum's rush hadn't worked on Heero when he was seven, much less seventeen. So, when the man tried it, Heero twisted his arm behind him, shoved him into the wall and hissed in his ear. "I don't like you. People I don't like usually get hurt. This time I'm only telling you . . . you don't want to mess with me. Sit in your seat like a good boy and nothing bad will happen. Cause any more trouble and I'll set the air marshal on you."

The man sat back in his seat, grumbling about his bruised arm and dignity. Heero looked around for the air marshal and couldn't see him. He hadn't thought much about the man, being too busy flying the plane. Now he wondered where he was. He looked up Zechs and asked him, Zechs didn't have a clue.

"Find him. I want to talk to him."

Zechs just nodded and started looking. He finally found the man in the bathroom at the back of the plane. He was passed out cold with the same symptoms the crew had. He'd evidently been the recipient of some of the cheese puffs. Zechs got a man from the economy class to help get Chester to the pod with the flight crew.

~ * ~

Heero opened the door, the light tap signaling that Zechs wanted in.

"Found the air marshal. He's sick too."

Heero nodded. "I was afraid of that. Where did you find him?"

"The loo at the back of economy. He's out cold. Probably went in there to vomit and passed out. Had a hell of a time getting the door open. He was wedged against it."

Heero rubbed his face. "Have Wufei take a look at him. ‘Fei's in the crew room."

Zechs nodded and stepped back so Heero could close the door. He tapped at the ready room door.

"‘Fei. I found the air marshal, he's sick too."

Wufei stood up and sighed. "I wasn't aware he was missing. I assumed he was taking care of business. Very remiss. Damn."

Wufei gave the poor man a once over and opined that he was as well as could be expected. "At least he's not as badly dehydrated as the others. Miss. . . ." Wufei got a look at Doris's name tag. "Doris. Please see if you can't get some liquids into them. And, thank you for helping take care of them."

Doris flushed with pleasure. "I don't mind. I want to be a nurse, but I can't afford the schooling yet. I've been studying on my own. And . . . well, I consider it an honor to help you."

Wufei smiled rather uncomfortably. "Thank you. If you notice any change in their condition. Call me at once. Use the intercom. Excuse me."

Wufei returned to the cockpit for the course correction.

~ * ~

Duo contacted the tower and settled in for another round of ‘you're too young' instead he got an ex-OZie.

"Which one are you?"

"Gundam 02. That a problem?"

"Nope, reassuring actually. I know you guys are excellent pilots. Got course corrections to do. Wind drift is . . ." the rest of the conversation was interesting to Heero and Wufei but anyone else would have been blind sided by strings of numbers and mumbo-jumbo. Duo made adjustments to the instruments, Wufei consulted charts and fiddled with calipers and a calculator.

"We're going to come in short of fuel. Not way short but we better watch it. This head wind is a killer."

Duo eyed the fuel gauges. "I don't like it. They always run themselves short. Lighten the load blah blah blah. You'd think they didn't grow corn anymore. Well, we have what we have."

Heero checked Wufei's calculations and came to the same conclusion he had. "I don't like this at all. We are going to be short of fuel, if we make one mistake, we're going to be flying on vapors. Why do they do that?"

Wufei made an irritable sound in his throat. "Economy. The less fuel in the tanks the less weight. You know the drill after that. It makes sense to bean counters."

They all sighed and settled in for a wait. Wufei and Duo went to sleep. There was no reason for them to stay awake, the auto pilot was engaged and it would only take a second to wake them if there was a need. Heero stood first watch.

Zechs, meanwhile, was ensconced in the forward lounge. They'd made an announcement that both the forward and first class lounges were closed. They didn't need someone taking on enough Dutch courage to do something stupid. The bar tender offered Zechs coffee, which he accepted.

"We going to make it? Really, man, I need to know."

Zechs shrugged. "I don't see why not. This boat flies like a shuttle. And Maxwell is an expert pilot. I fought him in the war. Frankly, he could fly anything and land it anywhere. The other two are no slouches either."

"I saw them when they went forward. Those kids are really the Gundam pilots?"

"Yes, they're really three of the five Gundam pilots."

The bar tender looked skeptical. "And you're sure because?"

"I'm the sixth."

"Oh . . . um, here's your coffee."

Zechs nodded at the man, who went back to whatever it was he'd been doing before.

He sipped at the coffee and realized he hadn't felt like this in a long time, half tired, half exhilarated, not since the war ended. He wondered for a moment if he was crazy, then decided that it didn't make any difference. He had a job to do, a job he was good at and it felt right.

~ * ~

Heero poked Duo with his foot. He wasn't getting his head anywhere near Duo until he was awake. Duo snorted, exploded from his seat, knife in hand; then he blinked, grumbled, and settled back down.

"What?"

"Auto pilot."

" ‘scuse me?"

"Time for another course correction. You need to turn off the auto pilot."

Duo scrubbed his face vigorously with both hands. "Ok."

Duo flicked the shut off switches then flicked them again, nothing happened. He fiddled with things for a moment then swore.

"Wufei, get on the hooter and tell them the auto pilot is fubar."

Wufei snorted once as he woke up. He put on his head set and contacted the tower. After some back and forth he turned to Duo.

"They say . . . flick the switches into on then back to off, one at a time. If that doesn't work, they'll send in a technician when we land . . . ancestors protect us all."

Duo made a rude noise but did as they'd said. It didn't work. No one was surprised but they'd done what they were told to do.

"Call ‘um up an' tell ‘um."

Wufei said something rude in Mandarin and did so. They said not to worry about it, the tech would fix it when they landed. Duo got on the radio, sounding cold, efficient and clinical he demanded, "And how the hell do you expect me to land this bucket if I can't turn off the auto pilot to make a course correction? Or work the controls to land?"

"The controls override the auto pilot."

Duo pinched the bridge of his nose. "This is Flight 204heavy. We're a wide body. The auto pilot overrides the controls. Get your shit together."

There was a short silence, partially filled by radio noise then the air traffic controller came back on with the ‘good' news that they had to turn off the auto pilot and they could do it any way they could.

"Well, thanks for that news flash. We'll be out of contact until we figure out something." Duo tossed his head set and sighed. "Heero, hack that monster, will you? I'll keep on the stick until we see if that's going to work. If it does, I'll have the yoke in hand. If we don't get that auto pilot off, this plane is going to turn into a Ralph Rocket about three minutes after we run out of gas."

Wufei settled into the copilot's seat giving up navigation to Heero as having a more direct connection to the onboard computer and the auto pilot programs. Heero grunted and started hacking.

It didn't take long to realize that the problem wasn't in the program but physical. Heero over rode the auto pilot through the computer then took over the yoke as Duo yanked the cover on the auto pilot and started tracing wires. If they didn't fix the auto pilot, someone was going to have to fly the plane for the next four hours. This wasn't that difficult but why wear themselves out if they didn't have to.

Duo made a face. "Aww, man. That's just nasty."

Wufei leaned in to peek over Duo's shoulder. "Ugh. It is."

"What, all ready?"

"Roaches. The computer is full of them. They ate right through the insulation. I need a piece of wire to splice this."

Duo fished in his braid and pulled out an appropriate piece, he spliced and fiddled a bit. "There . . . that ought to do it. Heero, hit the switches will you?"

Heero did and the auto pilot obligingly turned off. Duo settled into the pilot's seat and told Wufei to redo the corrections, they were now almost fifteen minutes past corrections. Wufei did as he was asked and gave Duo the numbers. Duo made them, reset the auto pilot and grumbled. "Fuel, fuel, we gonna be so short. Fuckfuckfuck."

Heero redid Duo's calculations in his head and agreed. None of them were happy.

~ * ~

Zechs was doing a walk through, show the colors and all that. He'd already checked with the steward in first class. Everything there was going as well as could be expected. Business class was just behind first class and the stewardess in charge there was happy to report that everyone there was calm, in their seats and cooperative. Zechs patted her on the shoulder thanking her for her calm. Economy was behind business with a galley between the two classes. The passengers there were just finishing up their meal and they all seemed to be resigned to their fate. *thank god*

Zechs realized that he hadn't gotten into tourist yet. Tourist was on the second level of the plane, accessed by a stair case opposite the galley between first and business. He gritted his teeth at this perceived dereliction of his duties and hurried down the steps.

He was greeted by half a dozen people. They'd obviously been waiting at the bottom of the stairs for sometime. They were rumpled and a little grumpy.

"Excuse me. I've been elected to speak for all of us. We're not very happy about being kept in the dark for so long. Who are you and what is going on?"

The whole group pinned him with unhappy looks.

"I'm so sorry. Frankly, I've been a little preoccupied. But that's no excuse. To put it simply. The entire flight crew and the air marshal are ill. There's no need to be concerned for the safety of your . . . er. . . who are you, please?"

The spokes man answered. "We're all tour groups headed to, well everywhere. We" he indicated the small group. "Are tour guides. One from each of the different companies. There are more groups, twenty in all, encompassing about two hundred people. But we elected representatives to cut down on confusion. Most of our charges aren't even aware that anything is wrong. So . . . who's minding the store."

"I am, along with three very competent pilots. We've taken over control of the plane with the approval of ESUN Aviation Administration. We're going to have to continue to our original destination. We can't land anywhere else."

"I see. And who, might I ask are the new crew?"

"I am Zechs Merquise acting first officer. The pilot is Duo Maxwell, copilot Heero Yuy, navigator is Chang Wufei. They're all qualified. Any other questions?"

"Not about that. But you said the crew is sick? Did you think to see if there's a physician on board? Maybe he could help."

Zechs blinked, one of those slow ‘why didn't I think of that' blinks. "I'll see to it at once. Thank you. Tell your people whatever you think is appropriate. And . . . thank you very much for keeping everyone so calm. Where's the steward staff?"

"Tourist doesn't have one. We do all the refreshments ourselves. It's an arrangement with the airline that keeps the cost down. We'll see that the meal is served. People are getting a little restless, but we didn't want to serve until we were sure what was going on. Thank you for coming down."

Zechs climbed the stairs and got on the PA system. His plea for a physician was answered by a stern looking older woman who snapped, "Well, is there an explanation or do I work in the dark.

Zechs told her the whole story, she informed him that he was lucky more people didn't know exactly what was going on. "I'd be handing out Prozac like M & M's'

After a quick check over, Dr. Marie Sanderson announced that the crew and the air marshal had food poisoning. She smelled the remains of the cheese puffs and sighed.

"Cream cheese. When will people learn? You have to keep it below 42 degrees." She wiped her hands with a disinfectant towelette and led Zechs to the forward lounge.

"They're not contagious. I'd move them in here and put them on the floor. You can pad it with blankets and get them more comfortable. I'll stay with them. There's not much to be done for them except nurse them through the symptoms. They're not dead, so they won't die. If we could have gotten them to a facility an hour ago we could have pumped their stomachs and helped them some. I'll just keep an eye on them. You go on about what ever it is you need to do. Shoo." She flapped her hand at him and settled into a chair. Zechs told the bar tender to do whatever she asked and left. The bar tender got the steward to help him move the men and get them resettled.

Zechs reported to Wufei and asked him if he thought they should make an announcement of some kind.

"I don't think so. The passengers are calm, so let's not rock the boat, so to speak. The less they know about us the better. We've already had one man try to take over because he saw us."

Zechs shrugged. "Ok. You want anything? Anyone?" Zechs included Duo and Heero in his question.

Duo asked for coffee, Heero for tea and Wufei denied needing anything. Zechs collected the drinks from the first class steward, checking on the Doctor and her patients on the way.

"Everything is good to go. Coffee, tea. I'm staying here for a while. I like a locked door between me and them. I'm exhausted."

~ * ~

The last contact with the tower was to confirm the landing instructions. The entire airport was turned upside down. All other traffic was diverted or in holding patterns. Crash crews were mobilized and medical help standing by.

Duo turned off the now functioning auto pilot and prepared for landing. The tower gave him final instructions and he asked for a gate number. He was given one but told that he didn't have to worry about it. He just snorted and signed off.

The landing was almost anticlimactic. Duo landed, taxied to the designated gate and shut down the engines. He checked the fuel gauges and growled. "Two more minutes and we'd have flamed out. Damn it. Who do I talk to?"

Duo keyed the mic and announced to the tower that they were all clear. The tower sputtered something about landing protocols, but Duo cut them off.

"Look all we want is to get off this disaster and get where we're supposed to be. So, get us a ride. We'll deplane a-sap. And if we see one reporter, I for one, am gonna go spastic. Do you copy?"

The tower did and assured Duo that they would be met.

They waited until all the passengers were off the plane, the explanation from the head steward being that they had things to do.

It took a while as the well passengers from First class and Business had to wait while the EMT's took the crew off first. Economy and Tourist both had their own doors so they began deplaning at once.

Then it was their turn, they got their baggage then headed for the tunnel from the plane to the concourse. Heero took point, with Duo and Wufei following, as far apart as they could get in the tunnel. Zechs took rear. He was tall enough to see over the other three. They all knew there was no threat from behind. None of them drew a weapon but they were all very wary. Each one of them had converted their carry ons into backpacks so they wouldn't be in the way.

They were met by a very apologetic air line official and a sheriff's deputy.

"I'm sorry. There's a conflict of interests here. We need to speak to you about the flight crew and the deputy is here to take you to your final destination."

The deputy was eyeing them with some disfavor. Duo bristled a little but Heero patted his arm and whispered. ‘Let Zechs deal with it. Just stand here and look pissed.'

So they did. Heero put on his stone face, Duo glared like it was all the deputy's fault and Wufei looked down his nose at them as only the son of a thousand generations of Chinese nobility could. And Zechs wasn't much better, he put on the arrogance of five hundred years of ruling a kingdom and demanded.

And got.

They were all escorted to a vehicle. One glance told them that they were up there in the local food chain. Their ride was a Hummer, huge, polished, very military; with the WEI logo on the door. The driver just stood up from his lean on the hood and waited with a small smile on his face.

The airline official was nearly dancing with upset.

"You can't leave yet the EAA needs to see you. And the debriefing for our people . . . and . . . wait!"

Zechs turned and shrugged. "You can send your people to us. We'll work you in somehow. Right now, we have to go."

The driver went around and opened the back of the Hummer for them to toss their bags inside. Then he climbed into the driver's seat and waited until they got themselves settled. The deputy followed them into the passenger compartment.

"Well, that was a circus and a half. Do you guys attract that sort of thing? Or are you just lucky?"

Duo looked at Heero who shuddered, Wufei groaned and poked Zechs. "Kill me now."

"Look buddy. I don't get into messes just for the fun of it. If I want violence and drama, I can always blow up something. All I really want is to have some peace and quiet. Like space peace and quiet between the stars drifting in a very small station peace and quiet. Fucking my lover blind peace and quiet. But do I get it? Nneeeeuuuuwww not poor Duo. all I ever get is grief and trouble and idiots asking me stupid questions and shooting at me, beating me up and shit. And stealing my parts and . . ."

Heero, Wufei and Zechs tuned Duo out and left the poor deputy wishing he'd kept his mouth shut.

Duo held out all the way to the sheriff's office.