How can I survive without you in my arms your fingers in my hair and your dreams in my heart? My days and nights are not meant to be spent making my own dreams come true, but yours. It's the stars in your eyes that I want to see sparkling and the curve in your arms that I want to see relaxing. I want to gaze into your eyes and see the clearest skies of contentness resting like an idle sailing dinghy moving up and down the waves like your breathing. |
Copyright ©2015 Ashi Shadow - 3/29/16 on Averi.
Considered using words more evocative than want such as seek or long to.
Decided that the diction should remain weak on the word want to emphasize other things.
I did not like the last line, I felt it was too weak to leave as a simile.
Maybe it should have been "as your breathing" or something like that.