HEART

I'm sitting here, I'm thinking

my eyes are unblinking

I have a tear in my eye

I feel like...I want to cry

but I repress it, hold it down

I will not let myself frown

it's not just sadness, happiness too

I don't show emotions, yellow or blue

they're good, they're bad, they're all in one

they're anger, confusion, anxiety, and fun

there's nothing for me,

I must be empty

that's what I aim for

to be perfect, to have lore

I want love, I want someone nice

I don't want sugar, I don't want spice

But I am undeserving in this life

I must not be with someone nice

"You should, you have a good heart" they say

"My heart's not good, it's aching" that's my way

I am depressive, I am suicidal, I am a romantic

I love Lortrakul

but most of all, I'm lonely

I am Ashi.