| I stand here and I'm talking to you |
| but I'm crying here, just crying without tears. |
| And inside there's a hole in my heart, |
| and the blood is pouring out at this very moment. |
| And I miss you and I love you |
| and I just want to say that "I love you" |
| but I can't. |
| Because I know you don't want to hear it. |
| Because I know that you don't love me. |
| Because I know that you don't want to be with me. |
| And I know it's not because of who I am but because of what I did. |
| And that just means that I'm the only one to blame. |
| And that just means that I can make no excuses, |
| because it was because of what I did. |
| And here I stand with my blood pouring out inside, |
| and you can't even see it. |
| But here I am dying |
| and here I am loving you |
| and here I am wishing that you loved me |
| I'd do anything if you loved me too |
| but instead here I'm dying, |
| dying more because you don't love me. |
| Dying more because I'm not supposed to be here. |
| Dying because there's no place that I'd rather be, |
| than standing here while you make me bleed inside until I die. |
| Because I love you. I love you so much. |
| So much that even when you hurt me more than anything else in the world |
| and even as I lay there curled and crying and wishing that I were not myself |
| I still would not wish to be anywhere but by you |
| because your leashing pain is still heaven |
| to the hell of not knowing you. |
| And I love you. |
| And I would do anything for you. |
| And I am doing nothing for you. |
| And I am dying for you. |
| But I love you. |
Copyright ©2003 Ashi Shadow 2/16/03 on Katie, on loving someone and not being loved, because she doesn't actively love me back.