You hate when I say "indian"
Rather than "native"
You were built inside-out
Holding your secrets tight
Until they explode.

You lie by the glow of a machine
Blue screen flame - words typed from foreign lovers
Across continents.
I hear your heart drumbeats from across the room
I see your wide child eyes and red feather blush.
Fragile eggshell hairline fractures
You dance so close on the edge of heartbreak
Deep...drop...down.

You tongue the grooves of love
Inhaling the sticky sweetness of life
The essence I cannot comprehend
To forge mind not body
To desire the word
Not the lavender scent of her hair
Nor eye-twinkle, silk of skin,
palm-to-palm, breast-to-breast
blossom to dark blossom.

Commitment to the invisible.
To have but not to hold.

Devouring the minds-eye vision
Reality to fantasy
Fingering smooth the rough edges
Of frustration

O, the joys of modern technology...

The oodles of "loolies" that you share
Implode in your heart like fireworks
Like silver bouquets.
Ignite your flame higher
Pull you in like quicksand
Yearning for her caramel skin
To hold
Like a whisper.

Some may call it crazy
or psychosomatic
i may call it blindly
as i see it
in this moonlight
Absolutely
Beautiful.

CF
2/16/02

For Carolyn Renee Woodruff