jj jackman in the midst of seven - index
prehumously (preface to my best friend) 1/26/00 it’s not that i want you to die now before your time as it were and yes shoulder pain can be excruciating humeral anguish my arms have been stretched feeling like they were sliced by a carpet knife hummus looks like urine colored mud and humorous humidity is redundant yes you are still moist and though it is not funny i wrote a two-ply poem to you before you died yes if you want it read at your funeral it’s a mere five thousand dollars please pay in advance perhaps my sense of moisture is a bit dry but then how many people know Sanskrit? humorists are all wet! and epitaphs are not post humus but a subtle middle of the road between that and poor humor ergo: posthumous (pahst u mus) well let’s cut through the decomposed matter so to speak and do you want me to read it at your funeral or not? not this! i mean what follows: my best friend! and since you didn’t show up at the reading last night i guess there’s no way for you to actually decide seeing that you haven’t heard it yet it’s quite good i’d be dying to kick if someone had something quite as good for my parting services it’s not that i want you to go just yet (but in a way you departed faithfully so many years ago) and hopefully you’ll out live me but just in case you don’t i’m sure you’ve picked your grave sight a pleasant ocean view hummock and the humble rev’rend of your choice and i’m sure you’ve mentioned that all donations are to be sent to PAHD in lieu of flowers and as acting executive director of Poets Against Hallucinogenic Drugs might i extend my gratitude beforehand but now its time to explicitly decide on your farewell address to be delivered by a friend who knew you well like me for instance but decide you must prehumously or you might get something like my grandfather got the generic trite summary that will have absolutely nothing to do with you at all when it is posthumously delivered and though the following eulogy has direct references to the famous composer Johannes Theophilus .......hmmm hmmm how can i begin our dear and fellow friend: __please be so kind as to allow me to put your name here__ having loved music so much has graciously compensated me and in this way encouraged me to read this address at his farewell ceremony: