I am a naturally self-destructive force
Taking pleasure in your pain
All those nights spent
Wide awake, wondering
If the fighting would end
Bitter because I would be blamed
For everything
I am much more comfortable
In the back seat with extra
Exacto knife blades tucked away in my purse
Just in case
And I still lay awake every night
Watching the shadows play
On the bumps on the ceiling
Afraid of the dark