God’s Euphoria

Just once more,
I promise,
Just once,
I gasp,
I close my eyes and breathe deep,
Rivers of sweat trickle down my face,
This is the last time I tell myself,
Even though I said that last time,
I just want to feel it once more,
I don’t need it but I want it,
I’m in control of this I say,
I can handle myself and my habits,
I’ll stop after this,
I just want one more,
These are the words,
They repeat in my mind,
They consume me,
They control me,
Comforting,
Reassuring,
Soothing,
Convincing,
I breathe deep again,
I know the words aren’t true,
But I cling to them,
I wish they were true,
I hope that by some miracle they will be,
The tube is tight around my arm now,
The veins poke out above the surface,
The sores from past uses are weeping,
I aim the needle down towards a vein,
It’s like the touch of god,
It will take away all my pain,
I swallow and push it in quickly,
I pull back the plunger slightly,
The blood spurts back into the syringe,
A crimson fountain in my hand,
In gods hand,
Because that’s who I am now,
That’s how I feel now,
I push the plunger down hard,
God’s job is done,
I’m going to visit heaven now,
The rush hits hard,
This batch is really good,
Somewhere deep down I make a vow,
A vow to do this again,
I’m hooked now,
There is no escape,
But for now I’m gone,
Gone away,
To another place,
My place,
Euphoria.

__________________________________

Written By Skaface of ThePork

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