The next Poem
"God's Euphoria".
I think it's pretty obvious what this is about.
It's about a heroin addict
that wants to quit but can't.
It's as though there is something inside him
that doesn't want to,
will not,
and knows it will continue.
But on the surface,
he wants to quit,
tells himself he can and will do it.
This is my personal favourite,
and was based on how I didn't like the way
my life was going at the time,
and wanted so badly to change it for the better,
but although i thought I wanted this,
when it came to putting in all the effort,
and actually changing,
there was something holding me back.
It was like my inner self didn't want to change,
I was always in two minds,
trying to push myself forwards,
and holding myself back at the same time.
The style of writing was influenced heavily by the book
"Trainspotting"
by Irvine Welsh,
the film of the same name,
and the film
"The Basketball Diaries".
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Last but not Least is
"The Lights"
This poem,
is literally the last experience of a man
that got into something
that was way over his head.
He has woken up in a strange place,
blinded,
and in pain.
He doesn't know what is happening,
until he hears the click.
The click is supposed to be that of the hammer
being pulled back on a gun.
This is when he realises what is happening,
and accepts his fate.
During my life,
I have been involved to quite an extent
with criminal activity,
and have known a lot of gangs and gangsters.
I never really thought about it,
since it was something I had grown into
from a young age.
When I wrote this,
it was when I'd got into something of a feud
with a major local gang.
At the time my life was in danger,
and it caused me
to take a step back and think about my life
and my involvement
with these people for the first time.
I realised I was in over my head,
and when I put pen to paper
later that night,
"The Lights"
was what came out.
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