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Embracing Negativity
by s1ckend
Location: -
  
previous entry : make me hate you next entry: Carcinogenesis.

feasting on the afterbirth 11/1/2001

I found jesus in my cereal bowl.
Sugar coated, and part of a balanced breakfast.

depression is so self-centered.

Draining hours like piss in front of some computer urinal. Jerking off to my favorite rock star.

Is this really what I’ve become?

Sorry mom.

No longer restrained into middle-class, middle culture, or middle ground. Give me heights of ecstasy, the depths of total insignificance. Binge on caffeine and barbiturates. Amphetamines, just to feel something.

Pornography? Too yesterday. Get me off on decapitations. Car accidents. Explosions. Something fresh.

Fuck me with lacerations, I’ll come in those wounds.

spare me the heartache, s1ck.

 
previous entry : make me hate you next entry: Carcinogenesis.
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I am open at all time except from 6-8am thursday mornings. I am devoted to spending my parents' money on my voice so that I can be the next brintey spears or even BETTER mandy moore! shoot me please.

Computer to urinal analogy. never heard anything like that before... If only I could learn to use a urinal... I would be the coolest girl around [Magnilia]


twisted but i can see your point. i agree with the other chick, i wish i could use a urinal instead of the toliet. :o) [amber*]

DMT [pinko commie bastard]

I found this intriuging, but like the rest, I find myself more interested in the urinal thing.

And yes, it's possible to use one of you don't have a penis. It's simply a matter of stance and stamina. *cough* I would know...

~Emily [Raccoon Bacon]


'depression is so self centered'
so true.
a different story, a different cause
what is yours?
[shy crayo|a.]

its there, were too blind to look
and once we think we see it, we destroy it.
[shy crayo|a.]

It all depends on who the rockstar is. [Could-you-hate-me]

You might grow out of it.
Title really got me. Some people do that, you know? To get "closer to nature" or some goddamn thing. Fry it up with onions & have at it. yurk

[Dammitall]


...and why'd you say Hallowe'en sucks? All you got were rocks?

[Dammitall]


What a great entry! I think its my favorite of yours. I particularly appreciate the sentiment "depression is so self-centered." Depression is the definition of self-absorption. [Kaisy]

all i wanted
out of life
was someone
to insult me rape me
push me to the ground
(if i'm not already there)
i crave the euphoric pain

(kisses) [pretty it up]


everyone beats me? well only my loved ones do that, my boyfriend beats me up because, i really dont know, hes crazy i guess and no it has nothing to do with me. there is something wrong with him, i think it has to do with his childhood, so you can get that thought right out of your head that its me starting it. [amber*]

Hmm...never was terribly fond of middle culture myself...interesting, though. Hope life improves in the near future. [Silver Seraph]

some are interested only in the computer urinal....blah...i liked the getting off on car accidents and decapitations...is there something wrong with that?? [lost_soull]

YEEEEAH! Dude thats so cool! Thats like.....dude! I get off on pictures of the Enola Gay. [ToolisCool]

you are not a beautiful and unique snowflake...god i love that line. and brad pitt is sexy. =) charles manson- interesting guy- i always pick him for reports in english classes. you remind me so much of a good friend. thanks for the note. [fallNdemn]

Just like you are here to make me feel iferior, I'm here to live in your cynical world. [kiwers]

I like the sorry, mom bit the most. [~top totty~]

..decapitations are so much more interesting than outdated PlayBoy articles..

Nice diary, it kept me intrigued for a matter of minutes. Wait, I have A.D.D., so minutes was a mighty large accomplishement. Okay, yeah, lame joke.

[Shattered.Purity.]


Beautiful diary. Your blunt pesimistic personality is refreshing. [My Name Is Laura]

life on consumption junction is crazy huh? [bleedingme34]

I fight more than a trained monkey! hahaha thats funny, i guess im a paradox(sp?) im a cheerleader who fights, there is something wrong with this picture cause im supposed to be bubbly and happy all the time and be stupid so it just dont fit that i scrap all the time eh? lol oh well i was never what i was supposed to be! yeah no one ever wants to hear that but sometimes you just need too...

... to ground you and stop you from thinking eveyone else is to blame, im really sorry about the note though, i was really in a pissed off mood and took it out on you. so now i am apologising. hope you acccept! [amber*]

sounds like a little hostility for the comfortable innovations in denial that make life worth......well....nothing. so i guess i should tell you it will all get better but it probably won't. later. [I Hate Myself]

youre very dark.. Suburban parents not let you drive the lexus Suv again?

i found nothing in my cereal bowl. the usual floated around, randomly selecting crisis criteria... [blood child]

I just wanna give ya a big ole hug!! Screw the sugar coating!! Your views are fascinating and your angst only adds to your genious.Menstruating whore sounds like a very interesting polish shade.I won't describe what I think it may look like as some may vomit. [the_crooked_halo]

glad i made you laugh... i'll have nothin else to do when i'm 18 or 19, so why the hell not? [Random Conflict]

Jesus CHRIST if I had as many people to talk to as you no way in hell would I be droppin borin me a note but wutever I am glad you did, thanx :-). Yeah know how that is. Everything is the same....same routine you just wanna BREAK OUT but you cant cuz ur a f*ckin teenager and ur damn life is controlled by your parents. Well at least thats how I feel. [confusdstargazer]

Try something. Go one day with out saying something negative to anyone or writting anything negative.

Descriptive, Im not a smut pusher if thats what you mean. [Lifeisgood]


i am the needle in your vein...

i am the high you can't sustain... [7 year bitch]


hmm.. interesting :)

Good to see you enjoued the link, hope it gave you a few ideas :) [d1sc0k1n6]


"Depression is so self-centered." I know. That's another reason to beat myself up. [Mercurio]

is it the same if i jerk off to this entry?

okay so maybe not literally.

i'm just as much as a victim as you.

[cathartic]


Reading through your notes is funny in a way.

Everybody loves you.

But no one understands you.

If I'm so wonderful then why am I so misunderstood?

[cathartic]


"this hairdo's truly evil."

-throwing muses [maddieblaylock]

 

   
 
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