The Night Before Christmas

Not a creature was stirring, not even that louse.

Pokeballs were hung by the bedpost with care,

In hopes that one day there'd be pokemon there.

"Our Hero" was sleeping, half out of his bed,

And his snoring made me wanna bash in his head.

I forced open the window and gave a small tap,

A signal to James he can set up the trap.

Then he dropped all the shovels and made such a clatter,

Ash's mom rushed outside to see what was the matter.

Away in the shadows I hid in a flash,

Seething, "This mistake's gonna cost us the cash!"

There were no tall bushes or trees, just a hoe,

And so James was trapped, he had nowhere to go.

So what to her wondering eyes should appear,

But James knee-deep in shovels, the poor airhead dear.

But as my poor James was about to get kicked,

I decided right then it was time for a trick.

I snapped my fingers and out Meowth came,

As Ash's mom made some threats that were really quite lame.

"Leave now, you bad robbers! Stop the trouble you're mixing,

Or I'll call the police, and it's you they'll be fixing!"

Then down Meowth jumped, from the top of the wall,

And poor Mrs. Ketchum, she had a bad fall.

And when she was out, to James I did fly,

He got whacked with my fan, and I'll bet he knew why.

"Come on, let's get moving, and let's steal Pikachu!"

And sheepish, James nodded, and picked up the tools.

With a scramble of feet we arrived on the roof,

But then James fell over, the sweet clumsy oaf.

I grabbed his arm and then wrenched him around,

And to his great dismay, his head I did pound.

Into the chimney I put my dainty foot,

And then I got mad: It was covered with soot!

So I made James go first, giving Meowth the pack,

And when they both grumbled, I gave them a whack.

"Hey Jesse," said Meowth, "this is too much to carry!"

I gave him a look that told him to be wary.

James said, "Um, Jesse, I really don't know..."

I kissed him, he shut up, and in we did go.

Silent as cats, spitting soot from our teeth,

And helping poor James when he tripped on a wreath,

We prowled the house, which was horribly smelly.

James holding his nose as he prowled looked quite silly.

We moved toward our quarry, pokeballs on a shelf,

I stayed clear of the twerp's room; I can't sully myself!

We knew, if we swung this, that when he went to bed,

Ash would lie awake nights, his mind filled with dread.

But just as we started to get down to work,

We heard a loud siren, and froze in mid-lurk.

'Twas Officer Jenny! James let go of his nose,

And we jumped out the window, having no time to pose.

We jumped up, called Arbok and Weezing with whistles,

And away from the twerp's house we ran, dodging missiles.

'Twas to leave them this thought that we paused in our flight:

"We'll be back, and we'll win!" "Meowth, that's right!"