align=center>You shine in a world full of ugliness.
You matter when everything is meaningless....
Sometimes, it's just that nothing seems worth saving.
I can't watch you slip away.
I won't let you fall apart....
It's something I have to do.
I was there, too.
Before everything else,
I was like you.
I won't let you fall apart.
-- Nine Inch Nails, "The Fragile"
@->->-
It was a sunny day in late summer. A cool ocean breeze began to blow, rustling the wispy fronds of the palm trees that surrounded our cabana. The gentle waves sloshing on the beach were like a lullaby to our ears.
Stretching myself out in my lounge chair, I yawned and reached for the frozen strawberry daiquiri on the nearby table. But as my hand closed around the icy glass, I felt my fingers entwine with Jessie's -- she had been reaching for the drink at the exact same moment!
I blushed and withdrew my hand, letting her go first. Jessie smiled at me and took a sip. Then, she handed the glass to me, and I did the same.
Jessie. She was wearing a bluish-purple bikini that was the exact same color as her eyes, and her long, red hair was the same shade as the strawberries in our drink. I swear, she had never looked more beautiful than she did at that moment, and she was lying right next to me! I couldn't imagine a better way to spend the day!
"To protect the world from devastation...." she muttered softly.
Our motto! I stood corrected -- this made things even better! Quickly, I jumped in with my own line, "To unite all peoples within our nation...."
And then, together....
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jessie...." she whispered.
"James, with the perfect tan!" I laughed, pleased with how nicely the sun was browning my alabaster skin.
"Mmmmm...there's nothing like a tropical vacation," Jessie sighed contentedly.
"The blue sea...." I said, nodding my head in agreement.
"The white sand...." Jess added.
"....And the blazing sun," I said, finishing the thought for her. (We do that a lot, I've noticed.) "That raging inferno...burning...and burning...and burning...."
I opened my eyes and saw a column of flame shooting down at me -- I was on fire! "BURNING!!!" I screamed, jumping to my feet and flailing about, trying desperately to extinguish the flames that were engulfing me.
Then, I heard Jessie scream. I looked to my right and saw her doing the same -- she was on fire, too! All of that gorgeous red hair was ablaze!
"Youse guys picked a bad place for a nap!" I heard Meowth say reproachfully.
My mind raced. Looking around, I saw a jet of water spewing from a leaking pipe on the wall. Quickly, I darted over to it and drowned the fires in my hair. Jessie did the same.
"What happened?" Jessie asked.
"While youse two were sleepin', the ship turned over," Meowth told us in a surprisingly calm voice.
"What?!" Jessie cried.
"We've got to abandon ship immediately!" I cried.
"I'm afraid it won't be dat simple," Meowth said matter-of-factly. "Ya see, when the ship turned over, it also sank to the bottom of the sea...."
When I heard this, panic seized me. "THE SHIP SANK! WE'RE DOOMED!!!" I screamed.
Jessie placed a hand on my shoulder. "Calm down, James!" she said firmly as she looked into my eyes.
As I gazed back into her sapphire-blue orbs, I suddenly found that all of my fear was gone. As long as Jessie was with me, I knew that I'd be okay. Hey, she'd probably even thought of a way to get us out of this mess!
Jessie smiled and took out her poke ball. "I've already thought of a way to get us out of this mess," she said.
My heart was racing now, but not from fear. It's like she read my mind! (I love it when she does that!)
"Go, Ekans!" she said, throwing the poke ball and releasing her snake pokemon.
"Ekannnsssss!"
"Ekans, Acid!" Jessie commanded. "Make a hole so we can get out of here!"
"Ekaaaa...." the snake hissed as she spit out a river of acid, which promptly began to eat through the metal of the floor. (Or was it the ceiling? I didn't know anymore!)
"NOOOOOOO!!!!!" Meowth screamed.
"Huh?" Jessie and I said in unison.
Ekans gave the cat a quizzical look.
Suddenly, a jet of water began to shoot up from the floor. Realizing our mistake, Jess and I quickly threw ourselves onto the leak, trying to stop it up.
"Ya idiots! The ship already sank! Ya think we need ANOTHA hole?!" Meowth screamed again.
I was about to tell him to shut up, but the force of the water became too great for us to hold back, and the narrow hallway was soon flooded.
It felt like a heavy weight was crushing down on my chest, and my lungs screamed for air, but there was nothing I could do -- if I inhaled, my body would become as flooded as the ship.
The stinging seawater blurred my vision, and everything went black.
Darkness. All the world was darkness, and I was lost in it. But then, I heard something that guided me back....
"Pre...pre...pare...f-for...trou...ble...."
Slowly, I opened my eyes. "Yes...and make it double...." I whimpered.
Then, my vision came into focus, and I saw the three twerps standing over us. What were THEY doing here?!
Shaking off the waterlogging we had just taken, Jessie, Meowth, and I leapt to our feet and tensed for a fight.
"So, you followed us all the way to the bottom of the sea?!" the guy who never opens his eyes said defensively.
"Yes, and now we've got you exactly where we want you!" Jessie said, taking out her poke ball once again.
I was scared out of my mind (and a little embarassed by the thought of being rescued by those kids), but I wasn't about to show it. So, I just followed Jessie's lead and brought out my own poke ball.
"All right! A battle!" the brat cried triumphantly.
Jessie and I threw our poke balls, releasing Ekans and Koffing. The two boys responded by releasing their own pokemon.
"Will you knock it off?! This is no time for a fight!" the little girl shouted, breaking us up before the confrontation could escalate beyond a stare-down.
Jessie looked a little disappointed, and she exhaled in a loud huff, but I was actually relieved. Misty was right -- this was hardly the time or the place for a pokemon battle.
But suddenly, the floor began to tilt, and we were all knocked off of our feet -- the ship was being thrown off balance from the extra weight of our pokemon!
After a few minutes of teetering and sliding back and forth, we all decided to call back the pokemon and forget about fighting for awhile. Once again, Jess looked kind of disappointed, but (as much as I hated to admit it) I knew that if we wanted to survive, we had to work together with those kids. So, reluctantly, Team Rocket shook hands with Team Twerp, and we declared a temporary truce.
@->->-
It turned out to be a stroke of luck, really. Misty actually built a model of the St. Anne once, so she knew the layout of the ship. And she came up with a plan to climb to the hull of the ship so we could escape that way.
Everything was dark as we made our way along the twisting corridors, and my lack of sight seemed to make me hypersensitive to all that was going on around me. Every sound seemed magnified -- the clomping of my boots on the metal floor, the pounding of my heart in my chest, even the breath in my lungs! I could also feel the warmth of Jessie's body as she walked mere inches in front of me. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and take her in my arms. I wanted to tell her everything that I felt for her, but I was afraid to....
Then, something occurred to me. In the darkness, I could hardly be blamed for an impulsive action! Maybe I really could tell Jessie how much I was in love with her! And just maybe those kids wouldn't laugh at me, and Jessie wouldn't whack me upside the head! (Yeah...and maybe I'm a Chinese jet pilot!)
Tentatively, I reached out to put my arms around her waist, but then, the brat shouted, "Charmander! I choose you!"
Suddenly, the black corridor was illuminated by a pale firelight that chased away the darkness...and my resolve. Damn!
@->->-
Before long, we came to a pair of doors. "The way to the hull is through here!" Misty informed us.
I breathed a sigh of relief. The sooner we got out of here, the better!
But when the kids pushed the doors open, they began to scream. "We can't get across!"
Jessie and Meowth tensed. I couldn't see what was going on because I was all the way in the back, but somehow, I knew we were in trouble (well, more trouble).
Nudging my way into the room, I suddenly saw what everybody was so upset about -- the way to the hull was on the other side of a large pit! And as if that weren't bad enough, the pit was filled with raging fires! We were trapped!
Well, now I was sure we were going to die. It was now or never!
"Jessica?" I said softly, taking Jessie's hands in my own.
Jessie looked up at me with her big, beautiful, blue eyes. "Yes, James?" she whispered.
"Whoever said beauty doesn't last...must've been thinking of us...." I told her.
Shit! I cursed myself. Why the hell did I say, "us?" I meant "you," Jessie! I meant to say "you!" God, we're about to die, and I STILL can't bring myself to tell you that I love you! What the hell is wrong with me?!
"Oh, James," Jessie said. "I'll always remember what a great...dresser you were."
She winced ever so slightly when she said this. Did she regret her choice of words as much as I did? Could it be that she was talking about more than just clothes? Could it be that she was in love with me, too, and she was just afraid to say it? No, that was impossible!
But as we gazed into each other's eyes, something told me that she did feel the same! There was just something about the look she was giving me....
"So will I!" I said, resting my forehead on her own.
Jessie closed her eyes, and the two of us embraced. We both meant more than we had implied, and we both knew it.
But before I could say anything more, I heard Misty shout, "Will you two knock it off?!"
Jessie pulled away from me, and our moment was officially over. I had missed yet another chance! Damn, damn, damn!
Then, I heard Ash shout, "Bulbasaur! Use your vines to make a bridge to the other side!"
I've gotta admit that was a pretty good idea.
"Yeah! We'll cross on Bulbasaur's vines!" Misty cheered as the pokemon made a narrow bridge across the fiery pit.
The three kids stepped out onto the vines and began to cross. But as I watched them tightrope-walking, I looked down into the flames and saw just what a percarious situation they were in.
And I suddenly realized that I couldn't do it.
"Jessie and Meowth you go ahead!" I wailed hysterically as all of the terror I was feeling finally caught up to me. "I'll stay here!" (After all, there was no sense in making them risk their lives for my sake...especially since it was all my fault we were on the ship when it sank in the first place!)
"JAMES, JAMES, JAMES, JAMES, JAMES!!!!!" Jessie screamed as she began to slap me across the face.
Tears were welling up in her eyes as she struck me. She wasn't doing it to be mean -- she was...she was doing it because she cared!
Then, in a calmer voice, "How long do you think you'd last on this side? Now come on. We'll cross together."
When she said this, her face softened into such a gentle expression I could scarcely believe it was her! In her eyes, I saw a mixture of concern, compassion, and...yes, I was sure of it...love!
I placed a hand to my cheek. The stinging pain of her slaps had snapped me out of my hysteria, and now this beautiful look on her face made me want to cry!
And that's exactly what I did.
On impulse, I threw my arms around her and buried my face in her shoulder. "Oh, Jessie! Please don't abandon me!" I sobbed.
Jessie responded by hugging back. "Don't worry. I won't," she said in that same gentle voice.
And she meant it, too. As she held me in her arms, I knew that she wouldn't leave me behind. I could trust her with my life! As long as Jessie was with me, I knew I'd be just fine. And this knowledge gave me the courage that I was going to need to cross that pit.
"Okay...let's go, then," I whispered.
Jessie smiled and took my hand in her own. "Yes," she whispered back.
But as we turned around, we saw the twerps standing in the doorway on the other side of the pit, and Bulbasaur was with them. They were going to leave us behind! How could they be so cruel?! (I know that sounds strange coming from a bad guy, but hey! This was a life-or-death situation! Jess, Meowth, and I may not like those kids, but we certainly wouldn't leave them to die if the situation were reversed -- we may scheme and steal, but taking a life is one line we'd never cross!)
"SEND THE VINES BACK!!! SEND THE VINES BACK!!!" we screamed in unison.
Ash smirked and commanded Bulbasaur to use Vine Whip again.
Once he had made another bridge for us, Jessie took my hand once again. "This is it, James. Are you ready?"
I nodded and tightened my grip on her own hand.
"Meowth, you go first," Jessie said to the cat. "You can probably make it across with no problem, but we may be a little slower...."
There was something comforting about the way she said that. "We." Not "me," not "I," but "we." She didn't have any regard for her own personal safety (that much was obvious if she was staying to help me) -- she was only thinking about getting me across that inferno! My heart was pounding harder than ever! Jessie really did care about me!
Meowth nodded and started out. Being a cat, he had superb balance, and he was able to bound nimbly along the vines until he was safe on the other side.
"Now it's your turn!" he called to us. "Good luck, youse two!"
Jessie turned and looked up at me. "Don't look down, James," she told me. "Just hold onto me, and step where I step, okay?"
"Okay," I replied.
The fingers of our joined hands entwined. Slowly, Jessie placed one foot onto the vine bridge...and then the other. I followed suit.
One foot in front of the other. That's how we set out. The feeling of those flimsy vines and nothing more beneath my feet was making me light-headed and dizzy. But then, that's why Jessie told me not to look down. If I actually saw just how easy it would be for me to fall, I'd probably become paralyzed with fear again...and I couldn't afford to do that now! Not when both of our lives were in the balance!
I felt my body going numb as we continued to make our way across the vines. In order to take my mind off of this, I concentrated on Jessie. All I could see was the back of her head, but I could sense that she was thinking about me in addition to watching where she was going.
"How're you doing, James?" she asked without turning around.
"I'm okay," I replied.
Jessie nodded slightly and took another careful step. I did the same.
Well, by now, we were halfway across the pit -- we had made it that far without incident. Just a little further, and we'd be safe!
"Come on, Team Rocket!" Ash shouted to us.
I know he only wanted to offer some encouragement, but his shouting was breaking our much-needed concentration. And Jessie didn't appreciate this!
"Shut up, kid!" she snapped. "We're going as fast as we can!"
Since Jessie couldn't very well walk while she was yelling at him, she paused for a moment. Unfortunately, I wasn't prepared for her to stop moving, and when I saw that I was about to crash into her, I toppled to the side.
And fell off of the vines.
"AUUUUUGH!!!!" I screamed as I lost my footing and began to plummet.
"JAMES!" Jessie screamed back when she realized what was happening.
I closed my eyes, not wanting to see the flames as they engulfed me, but then, I felt a vise-like grip on my hand -- Jessie was still holding onto me!
NO!!! my brain silently screamed. NO! Not only did I kill myself...I'm dragging her with me!
But suddenly, I found that I wasn't falling anymore.
I opened my eyes and saw Jessie. She was bowed backwards in what looked like an extremely uncomfortable position, but her feet were still firmly planted on the vines...and she still hadn't let go of me!
Slowly, she straightened her back and brought herself into a standing position once more. Then, she bent her legs to make herself less top-heavy and looked down at me.
"I...will...NOT...let...go! I promise!" she said through clenched teeth as her sapphire eyes locked with my emerald ones.
Words couldn't describe how terrified I was when I began to fall, but at that moment, as I gazed up at Jessie, I suddenly found that I wasn't afraid anymore! The look of resolve in her eyes...the firmness of her grip...the expression of sheer willpower on her face -- everything about her told me that she was in complete control and that she was going to make sure nothing happened to me.
Never before had I been in such a percarious position. Never before had I been so close to death. And never before had I felt safer! I wasn't going to fall...and we were going to make it across that bridge! I had no doubt about it!
But if Jessie was going to get us across, she needed my help. Everything we do, we do together, and this moment was no different -- this had to be a team effort!
I slowly reached up with my other hand, and Jessie grabbed onto that one as well. Then, bending her legs a little more and planting her feet even more firmly on the vines, she began to pull upwards.
In the distance, I could hear Meowth and those three kids screaming at the top of their lungs, but I wasn't listening to them. At that moment, all I knew was Jessie. She was my lifeline, and only her shining blue-violet eyes and strong hands existed.
Rivers of sweat rolled down her face, and the powerful muscles in her arms and thighs corded as she labored to bring me back up. I kicked the empty air and tensed my own muscles, attempting to help her in any way that I could.
After a few minutes, which seemed more like an eternity, I was high enough to bring one of my feet up and place it back on the vines. And now that some of my weight was bearing down on the bridge, I wasn't nearly as heavy, and pulling me completely up was a simple matter.
Jessie threw her arms around me, and I did the same to her. Our two hearts were thundering in our chests, and we were both drenched with sweat.
"Are you okay?" she gasped.
Too breathless to speak, I simply nodded.
Her face softened into that gentle smile again. "Then, come on. Let's get going."
I nodded again.
Jessie took my hands in her own once more and held me tighter than ever. "Be more careful, James!"
I responded by giving her hands a gentle squeeze and entwining our fingers just like before. "I will," I whispered.
And so, the two of us found our footing again and continued to make our way across the vines. It was slower going now (after that ordeal, Jessie was being more cautious than ever and wanted to make extra sure that there were no more false steps), but eventually, we made it.
@->->-
Once the two of us were back on the solid floor, the physical and mental strain of what had just happened finally caught up with us, and we collapsed to our knees.
"We made it!" Jessie said as she gasped for air.
"Yeah," I replied.
We gazed into each other's eyes once more, and I found myself thinking about the dream I'd had earlier. When I saw Jessie in that bikini, I thought she'd never looked more beautiful. But now I knew I was wrong. Even though her hair was now matted and frizzed, her make-up was smudged, and she was covered with dirt and sweat, I swear she was the most lovely sight I had ever seen! When I looked at her, I saw was a strong, brave, unselfish woman whom I could trust with my very life!
Oh, Jessie! I love you so much! I said to myself. I love you more than anything....
But as I opened my mouth to say it aloud, I suddenly heard Ash shout, "Come on! This is no time for a break!"
What the hell did he mean this was no time for a break?! Jessie and I had almost died! And where did he get off interrupting me when I was just about to finally tell Jess how I felt about her?! I swear, that kid can be so insensitive!
Fighting my urge to smack him upside the head, I got back to my feet. And as Jessie stood up, I could tell that she was just as annoyed as I was!
@->->-
And so, we continued towards the hull of the ship, as if nothing had ever happened. When we finally arrived, Ash got his Charmander to burn a hole through the metal.
As I watched the water come pouring down, I started panicking again. Exactly how were we supposed to escape? What were we going to do now?
"Okay, everybody! Grab onto a water pokemon!" Misty shouted.
With that, she brought out her Goldeen and Starmie, and she and Brock tied ropes to them. Ash did the same with his Squirtle.
"Hey! What about us?!" Jessie demanded.
"Grab onto a water pokemon!" Misty shouted again as she and the others used their pokemon to swim up through the hole.
A water pokemon? Hello! How many times had we battled her and her friends? And how many water pokemon had we ever used against them? Didn't she know by now that the only pokemon we had were Ekans and Koffing? Would it have killed her to loan us her Staryu for a few minutes?
"Hey! Come back here!" Jessie cried. "We don't have any water pokemon!"
I hung my head and sighed. Those kids didn't know us at all! (It really breaks my heart when people think there's nothing more to me and Jessie than Team Rocket...when all they see is the scarlet letter emblazoned on our jackets.) Why couldn't they seem to understand?
"Oh! We're in trouble!" Jessie shouted as the water kept flooding into the hull of the ship. Now that there was such a major leak, there would be nowhere for us to run -- we were going to drown!
Or were we?
Suddenly, I remembered what had gotten us into this mess in the first place -- that Magikarp I'd bought with Jessie's paycheck! Magikarp was a fish! We could use him to escape! And more importantly, this was my chance to redeem myself! Jessie had just saved my life...now it was my turn to save hers! As I thought about this, I began to laugh.
"I don't see what's so funny," Jessie said dryly.
"Poor guy's crackin' up...just like the ship," Meowth remarked.
"You laughed at me...you made fun of me...but a true genius is never really appreciated until he's needed," I said smugly.
I turned and looked at the two of them from the corner of my eye. They looked confused...and terrified.
"You thought I was stupid, but I knew we'd need this in a tight spot....Behold! Magikarp!" I explained, holding out the gold-plated poke ball containing my purchase.
"Magikarp!" Jessie cried, clasping her hands and giving me a look of pure adoration.
"Yes! Feast your eyes on the King of Karp -- Magikarp!" I laughed.
Jessie and Meowth fell to their knees. "We're not worthy! We're not worthy!" they cried, bowing down before me.
"You're the best, James!" Jessie cried, gazing up at me with adoring eyes.
"James, from now on, I'm gonna give ya the respect ya deserve!" Meowth said apologetically.
Suddenly, I felt pretty damned proud of myself. Maybe buying that Magikarp wasn't such a stupid idea after all! "Well, better late than never, I guess."
"Oh, stop bragging!" Jessie growled, snapping me out of my moment. "Let's just use that thing to get out of here!"
With that, I stopped posturing and tied a rope around Magikarp. Then, Jessie, Meowth, and I tied the other end of the rope around ourselves.
"Alright, Magikarp! Do your stuff!" I commanded.
"Karp! Karp! Magi-karp!" the fish said as it flopped about in the water.
The three of us facefaulted.
"DON'T TELL ME DAT FISH CAN'T SWIM!!!" Meowth screamed.
"Swim?! It can barely splash!" Jessie cried.
I hung my head again. It was a stupid idea after all! God, how could I have been such an idiot?!
Suddenly, the hull gave way, and water began pouring down on us faster than ever. So this was how it was going to end?
Jessie's eyes locked with mine, and a tear spilled down her cheek. She knew we were going to die, too!
I have to do it! I thought. This is my final chance....
"Jessie?"
"James?"
"Jessie...I lo-"
But it was too late. By then, the hull was completely flooded, and my words were drowned before they could escape from my mouth.
Still, I was determined to make the most of our last moments of life. I took Jessie in my arms, and she did the same to me. The weight of the entire ocean was crushing us, and the salty water was beginning to seep into our lungs, but I persisted. Maybe...just maybe if I did this, she could survive. She had almost sacrificed herself for me...so how could I do any less for her?
As Jessie slipped out of consciousness, I pressed my lips against hers and exhaled as hard as I could, forcing my remaining breath into her lungs.
And then, I knew no more....
When I opened my eyes again, I was surrounded by white light. So this was what it was like to be dead? This was Heaven?
Then, I heard grunting sounds and felt something pressing on my shoulders.
Slowly, my vision came into focus. Jessie and Meowth were draped on top of me, and it looked like we were on a raft. I felt the pressing sensation again and noticed that somebody was pushing the three of us off of the raft and back into the water! I looked up and saw the brats! What did they think they were doing?!
At that moment, Jessie and Meowth woke up, too, and we snapped our heads up, giving those kids a venomous glare.
"AUUUUUUGH!!!!!!! ZOMBIES!!!!!!!" they screamed.
Well, I knew we probably looked kind of rough, considering what we had just been through, but did they really have to insult us like that?
"Zombies?! Who are you calling zombies?!" I demanded.
"We are not zombies!" Jessie snapped.
"Help! Help! I'm gettin' wet!" Meowth, who had fallen into the water, shrieked as he scrambled back onto the raft.
"So, you survived?" Ash said in disbelief.
"Yeah! No thanks to you!" Jessie growled.
"What's that supposed to mean?!" Misty snapped back. "I told you to grab onto a water pokemon!"
"Hmmmph! Kind of difficult when the only one we have is a worthless MAGIKARP!!" Jessie retorted. When she said this, she scowled at me.
I cringed as her fist connected with my face.
Jessie made a good point, and since nobody could really argue with it, an uneasy silence fell over us.
@->->-
Before long, Meowth and those kids drifted off to sleep, but as exhausted as I was, I just couldn't seem to do the same. My brain was too muddled.
I looked over at Jessie. She was sitting on the other end of the raft, gazing out over the sea. I thought about all that the two of us had been through earlier that day, and feelings of love for her overwhelmed me.
Then, my gaze drifted to the Magikarp that was flopping around between us, and I suddenly found myself feeling guilty again. Stupid fish! I said to myself. Jessie probably hates me now because of you....
Oh, who did I think I was kidding? Sure, that worthless Magikarp had screwed everything up for us in the past couple of days, but in my heart, I knew that it was really my fault. If I hadn't bought the damned thing in the first place, we wouldn't have been on the ship when it sank...and none of the ordeals we'd faced would have ever happened. And to make matters worse, I had used Jessie's money to buy it! What was I thinking?!
Tears welled up in my eyes as I pondered this. Because of me, Jessie had almost gotten herself killed, almost drowned. I loved her more than anything else in the world, but how could I ever expect her to feel the same about me now? Suddenly, my tears began to fall, and there was nothing I could do to stop them.
A few minutes later, I regained my composure and took a deep breath. I couldn't go on like this -- the silence was killing me! I wished she'd just come over and curse me out or whack me with her mallet a few times...it was going to happen eventually anyway, and God knows, I deserved it!
But Jessie still wasn't looking at me. All I could see was her back, but I could tell she was upset. She couldn't stand the silence any more than I could, but she wasn't going to be the one to break it. No, I was the one who had screwed up, so it was my responsibility to make the first move.
I reached into my pocket and pulled out two roses -- a red one and a white one. A simple apology wouldn't be enough after what I'd done -- I needed to offer something more...a concrete symbol of my sincerity.
But which rose? I wanted to give her the red one. After all, the red rose is my favorite because it's the exact same color as her hair. And, it's the flower of love, romance, beauty, and passion. The red rose is the perfect symbol of everything I feel for Jessie, which is why I always have one on hand!
And that's why I couldn't give it to her. I wanted more than anything to confess my true feelings to her, but how could I do that when she wasn't even talking to me? No, giving her the red rose now would be wrong -- it would imply too much, and it would probably drive her away....
Then, I looked at the white rose. White. The color of innocence...of purity...of peace. Yes, this one seemed more appropriate. It was still a symbol of love and beauty, but it was more like friendship than romance. And this moment called for a peace offering more than a romantic gesture. The white one it was!
I made my way across the raft as quietly as I could, not wanting to wake the others. Not only would it be rude (hey, I'm not insensitive like those kids), but I also wanted this moment with Jessie alone.
I hadn't made a sound, but Jessie still knew I was there. She turned and looked up at me as I came to her side.
"James?"
I smiled and tentatively held the white rose out to her. "For you," I said.
Jessie returned the smile. "It's beautiful," she said softly, taking the flower and inhaling its sweet fragrance. "What's it for?"
"A bunch of things, I guess," I told her. "I wanted to say thank you for not leaving me behind, for saving my life,...and...." I hung my head and felt the guilt welling up inside of me once again. "....And...I'm sorry."
That was when I broke down completely.
"Oh, Jessie, I'm so sorry!" I said as I burst into tears. "This was all my fault...."
Jessie's face softened into that same gentle look she had given me earlier, and she wrapped her arms around me, pulling me into a tight embrace. "James...James, it's okay...."
"No, it's not," I sobbed, burying my face in her shoulder. "I've acted like such an idiot these past couple of days...and you were almost killed because of that!"
Jessie rocked me back and forth and ran her fingers through my hair as I put my arms around her. "Shhh...don't cry, James. I'm not mad at you," she whispered into my ear.
I looked up at her. "You're not?" I said in disbelief.
She shook her head and gently brushed my tears away.
"But...."
Jessie placed a finger to my lips and silenced me. "God, James! How could you think that I'd be angry with you?" she asked.
"You weren't talking to me," I said. "I thought you hated me for what I did...you certainly have a right to...."
Jessie's mouth began to quiver, and a tear rolled down her cheek. "That's not why I was so upset!" she cried.
"Then why?"
Jessie held me as close as she possibly could...almost as if she were afraid to let go. "James, I almost lost you today! When we were crossing that pit...and I saw you fall...well, I thought that was it...that you were going to die...." Then, her voice trailed off, and she began to cry, too.
"But I didn't," I told her. "Because of you, I didn't -- you saved me, Jess!"
"But I was so afraid, James!" she sobbed. "I was afraid that I wouldn't be strong enough to hold on to you...I was afraid that I'd drop you...."
"Well, I wasn't," I replied in all honesty. "Sure, I was scared at first, but when you caught me, and I looked into your eyes, I felt safe...I knew you weren't going to let anything bad happen."
Jessie wiped away her tears and smiled at me. "Really?"
I nodded. "My life was literally in your hands today, and I never felt safer."
"You have that much faith in me? You trust me that much?"
"Yes."
This made her smile even wider. "Then you're the first," she told me.
"But I won't be the last," I said. "Jess, I've never known anybody as brave or as strong as you. I can't imagine another person I'd rather trust with my life."
Jessie pulled me into another embrace. "Thank you, James. You have no idea how much that means to me."
I hugged back, and she continued to stroke my hair.
"I guess I can keep a promise, after all," she said after a moment of silence.
I pulled away slightly and gave her a quizzical look.
"What do I always say, James?" she asked when she saw my confusion.
I raised an eyebrow.
"What do I always say, James?" she asked again.
I thought about this for a moment. Something she always said...somehow, I knew she was talking about our motto. "To protect the world from devastation?" I ventured, repeating one of her lines.
Jessie nodded. "What do you think that means?"
I closed my eyes and mulled it over. Suddenly, the realization struck me! "Me?" I asked, looking up at her.
Jessie smiled. "Yes."
I couldn't reply -- I was so surprised that words failed me!
"What's wrong, James?" she asked sadly. "Is it really so strange for me to show how much I care about you?"
"It's not that," I replied. "It's just that you risked your life for me...even after I wasted all of your money and almost got you killed. You had every right to leave me behind, but you didn't...and I don't understand why...." Feelings of shame overwhelmed me when I said this out loud, and I hung my head again.
Jessie cupped my chin in her hand and gazed lovingly into my eyes. "I could never leave you behind, James. You're my best friend...my entire world! I'd do anything to keep you safe."
"Jessie!" I whispered as I began to cry again.
"It's okay," she whispered back as she took me in her arms once more.
Too choked-up to speak, I just returned the embrace and thought about what she had told me. And I realized that she was right!
When Jessie first joined Team Rocket, she didn't want me to come with her because she was afraid of what their evil would do to me. But I followed her anyway, and somehow, the evil has never been able to crush my spirit.
Now I knew why.
Jessie wasn't always as violent or hot-tempered as she is now. Sure, she was always hard, but when we were children there was an air of innocence about her. An innocence that vanished when we joined Team Rocket. I always thought that she changed because she allowed their evil to become a part of her, but now I knew that this wasn't true! The only reason she hated...the only reason she fought, was so I wouldn't have to! She sacrificed her innocence to protect mine!
I wiped the tears from my eyes and looked up at Jessie again. The light of the rising moon was behind her, surrounding her with a silver aura that made her look like an angel.
And that's exactly what she was -- my angel!
"You sacrificed so much by joining Team Rocket with me," she said as if she could read my mind. "How could I do any less for you?"
"Thank you, Jessie," I said softly, wrapping my arms around her waist and resting my head on her shoulder again.
"You're the most important thing in the world to me, James," she replied as she returned the embrace. "I will always protect you...."
"I know...I know...." I told her.
Jessie pulled me closer and rested her head on top of my own. We sat there like that for several minutes until the warmth of her body and the beating of her heart started to make me drowzy. I closed my eyes and felt her push a strand of my hair aside and press her lips against my forehead. And then, I fell asleep in her arms, knowing that she would keep me safe, no matter what.
As long as Jessie was there with me, I knew I'd be just fine.