Anyways, lemon warning! And, I suppose if this had a timeline, it would be manga continuity after the end of the Surf's Up, Pikachu stories, but before they have a chance to travel together again. Lyrics and song by The Corrs, you can find said lyrics at the end... Enjoy!
These characters are not mine, and neither is Pokemon in general. So please don't think I'm doing this for any reason beyond fun and entertainment purposes...
"I can't believe you're keeping a journal." I whisper, disbelief heavy in my voice. I gaze across the simple round table, at the center of the simple white room. A bed in the corner, the table adorned with twin chairs... The only surface that mars the pristine condition of the wall is a bland door that leads to the bathroom.
Nothing else. *Nothing*...
He pauses, ebon bangs shadowing his dark brown eyes as he pulls his attention from the task of writing. The tip of the pencil eases away from the paper, and he looks towards me, his eyes capturing mine rather effectively. "It makes it bearable..." His voice is a hushed whisper, and then his attention descends back to his journal.
An instant flashes by, and the only sounds are breathing and the scrape of lead on paper...
He's right. He needs something to make it bearable... Because it's all so damn surreal. Not the fact that we're here together. No, that's believable. It's the fact that there's no way to leave. We're prisoners, pure and simple. So I have to believe it's a dream, otherwise I don't think I'll be able to keep a hold on my sanity.
...Even though I know it hurts too much to be a dream. "We're kept pets." I sigh. He doesn't pause as he continues to write. I've always wondered *what* he's written...
"At least we're friends again..."
And I know that means a lot to him. Very little means anything anymore, so I *know* our friendship is important. I know because it means the same to me. Something warm to hold onto, something that helps fight off the cold of the situation. Even though it is rather warm right now... A reason why we without words decided that it was best to remove our shirts...
You know, he practically fell all over himself when I suggested we turn over a new leaf, if only for the oddness of the situation. We tried being ourselves... Arguing was one of the things that gained us punishment. Just one of the things; those jolts of pain, like needles stabbing themselves into the back of my neck...
I know it hurt him as well. But the pain came with no reason... There's nothing there, so why? I feel like I'm some sort of science project. Like whoever is doing this is trying to condition reactions out of us... I...
I can still remember that moment he forgave me. And I forgave him... He hugged me, he actually *hugged* me, and... I'm trying to suppress the fire that burns as that memory tries to encompass me - his slight body, pressed against mine, his arms holding me tight. I can remember the scent of his hair, fresh and...
"Ne, are you all right?" His sweet voice calls me back from the abyss of deep memory. I have to remind myself these things, sometimes... We're trapped here together, we have no idea why or by who, or what they really want from us, and insanely enough, I *want* him... I want him so bad I can taste it.
Sometimes I scare myself. Who the hell invented hormones, anyways? Because I don't know how long I can restrain myself, and I don't want him to hate me. He hated me for so long...
I mean... we were horrible jerks to each other for five years, because we had to both be egotistical and think that we could be Pokemon masters. That wedged itself between us quite nicely, and I remember each time we saw each other after that, up until the Sekiei Kougen... The last time I saw him before this all started was him *losing*... I expected it of myself, but not *him*. He was supposed to win...
And then... months passed, he won in the Orange League, and I... I had nothing. All I wanted to do was find him, apologize, and congratulate him on his success... And then we were here. There's no transition. One moment to the next. It's like the memories were taken away... I can't remember them at all.
I take a deep breath, "Hai, I'm fine."
One jet dark eyebrow lifts in question. "Are you sure? You seem... distracted... warm..." He's searching for the proper way to describe it, and he blushes in confusion. "You know what I mean."
"Well, maybe," I laugh, and he grins. "We're not half dressed in our jeans because it's cool in here, baka..." He pouts, but he knows it's true. Like I said, it's the same reason his chest is bared to me, allowing my imagination to run wild... I mean, it was his suggestion. It really was...
The fact that he's so close, he's within reach... he goes back to writing, and I wish I could see what he found so interesting there. I've never tried before, but I need something to distract me...
Other than the curve of his pale ivory neck. He's so flawless. And with his dark hair, he's truly like a fallen angel, sitting across from me. All moonlight fair and midnight deep... Poetic, I know, but I have to cling to something or I'm going to jump him.
I... I wonder what his skin tastes like. I wonder... what sounds he'd make if I... I wonder if he'd let me kiss him... I wonder if I could just stop at a kiss. I'm burning, and I haven't even *touched* him. To have a taste... I don't think I could ever let go, once I began.
...If, I should say.
I sigh. You know, just call it a hunch, a perverse hunch, but I have an idea... No, I know what I'd find in the bedside table if I just *looked*...
I... this isn't helping me... I need to do something, or else. Something has to be able to distract me... Because if I can't find something to focus on, then I won't be able to stop myself. I feel... So dirty.
"Are you hungry?" That sounds safe enough.
"Hai, you?" He asks, as he closes the journal, and sets the pencil aside. My gaze lingers on his fingers as he pushes it away...
I nod and whisper, looking back to him. "Hai..."
He looks to the wall, and the slot that gives us our food... It's only there when they want to feed us. Three meals a day... And then I find myself thinking.
What does he see when he looks at me? He's so... angelic, just in appearance. He's kind hearted and he'd go out on a limb for a total stranger. He's... pure and untouchable, and I want to corrupt that innocence...
So what does he see when he looks at me? Am I some sort of flame haired demon, his mirror? I know I don't feel angelic, not at all.
"Food's here." he calls, setting own the tray between us. I'd been so involved, I hadn't been paying attention to him, to anything, at all...
I try to shake away my heavy thoughts, and concentrate on the task of eating. Although the food is 'bleh', another thing we both learned early on was that not eating brought punishment as well. They don't want us to die...
No, I'm not going to think about that. Instead, I focus on my food, and it almost works... Because I keep stealing glances towards him, paying him more attention than the food I pick at.
He's beautiful, and watching him eat is so utterly enthralling. It's... It's, odd enough, it's perfect. I could stay here forever, as long as I'm with you.
...I can't believe I just thought that. No, he's staring at me like...
"Did I say that out loud?" I whisper, and he nods, his eyes wide. Filled with beautiful confusion...
"Yeah... um, you're good company... I... I had to grow up to see that. I... don't think I could manage being in a deprived situation like this without you..."
He smiles, and looks rather relieved. "I... really? You being here... you're what really makes it bearable, you know..." He looks back down at his plate, and it's like... No, I'm not going to go there.
"Thank you..."
Maybe it's the bare thought that doesn't despise me, that I might possibly have a chance. That surge of insane desire returns. I want to see him beneath me, I want to hear him whimper my name, I want to feel *him*, I want...
"I'm finished." I murmur, even though I've barely touched my food. At least, I note, I ate enough to keep them, whoever *they* are, from punishing me. I answer him before he can even question me. "I'm all right, just not hungry..."
And I need a cold shower, because if I don't do something... Then I'm going to regret it. I just hope that this would be enough...
He... he can be so confusing at times. Well, at least we aren't arguing. In some twisted way, this reminds me of when we were friends, years and years ago. Only then, it wasn't under these conditions...
Part of me wants to tell me that the only reason he suggested our friendship this time around, is because our arguing only brought swift punishment. My head aches in memory of the pain... Those jolts of pain that came with no explanation. I wish there was a face I could put to whoever's doing this to us, but... I sigh.
There's another part of me that thinks he never wanted Pokemon to get in the way of our friendship. But, simply, we were stupid little boys, and we did things that we now regret. I'm sure that things could have been so different, if one or both of us hadn't had the dream of Pokemon master looming before us...
But that isn't going to do anything for me now. He's all I have. Him and my journal... The journal that I fill with thoughts on how things could have been. The way... the way I really wish they could be. The way he looks at me... I'm not imagining things, am I?
He sets barely touched food back on the tray, and then he flees like some condemned man to the safety of the bathroom. The door clicks as he locks it, and now I'm alone.
I don't even know how long we've been here. Only that it's been long enough for us to learn. I can't get mad at him. Not that he's done anything that could cause it, lately. But... just the thought. One time, I would have been quick to know just *what* would set me off. But now... I can't think of it. I'm *afraid* of it, afraid of what would happen, and...
I wonder how our Pokemon are doing. We haven't seen them since we were captured. And our friends... I'm sure he has friends... And our families... They must be sick with worry.
Is it just me, or do I unnerve him? I don't know why, I don't even try... But it's there. I realise I can't eat anymore, so I finish the glass of water, and clean up our mess. I return the tray to the slot...
I once thought freedom lie beyond that hole. But it's only a tube... He's right. We *are* kept pets. But kept by whom? And for what reason? It makes no sense...
I move to the bed, and lie down. The covers feel cooler than the rest of the room, charged and warm as it is. I sigh, not covering myself. I don't want to suffocate... It's so damn warm. Maybe even more than before...
In time, the sound of water comes from the closed door, and I close my eyes. I feel horrible, you know, but I can't help but wonder, what, if I could possibly... Him, nude, under the water. Yes, I feel horrible...
More time passes, and the water fades away. The door clicks, and then I hear bare feet padding across the cool tiles of the room, and I sit up. He's still damp, water beads on his face and more on his fiery hair, there's a towel across his shoulders. He... he looks like he tried to find something, and now... And now he's going to break, because he's not happy with what he found.
"Are you--?" I begin, but then I'm knocked back onto the bed as he latches onto me. He buries his face in the crook of my neck. Hot breath seers across my skin, wet hair tickles my cheek, and...
I swallow, slowly freeing my arms so that I might hold him as well. "What's wrong?" I ask softly, only too aware of his weight, pinning me down. When he replies his voice is choked with tears and emotion, muffled by his faces position.
"I'm sorry."
"Sorry for what?" I ask softly, rubbing his back gently. "What do you have to be sorry for?"
He shifts, and then... Ahh, I think I just realised why he's so sorry. "I didn't... I don't know what to think anymore. I want... you..." His voice cracks, and I can feel tears on my skin, soaking my flesh. I close my eyes and try and find words to sooth him...
This is surreal, the fact that he's talking to me about this. It's just... If he shifted a bit more, he might possibly figure out that I feel just as bad about *my* reaction.
"It's all right..." They're all I can say, and he holds me tighter, as he lifts tear damp cheeks to gaze at me.
"How can you say that?! I'm horrible... I'm..." I free a hand and reach out, to brush at the tears. But they won't stop... It's a constant downpour. And then he nuzzles his face against my throat again, and I whimper involuntarily as he kisses me, sucks at the flesh... There's a sting, and the only way I can describe it, is the delighted shiver that it sends running down my spine.
"You're not horrible..." I whisper, breathless. This is... Oh god...
"But look at me..." He whispers, between kisses and whimpered sobs. "If you love someone, you shouldn't do this! And I love you and..." And then his voice cuts off completely as he begins the renewed assault of my throat. I arch against the touch... I'm not sure he knew what he just said.
That he loves me.
"Shi... Shi.." I can't even find the breath to whisper his name, I'm having such a hard time concentrating on anything. I don't think I've ever felt quite this way... "Ah... ah..."
I'm trying to figure out how I can be so calm about this. I really am... I'm trying to figure out what we've been conditioned for... I really can't be angry. I don't think I can ever deny him, anymore. I... "Shigeru!" I gasp, as the assault moves, dancing on my earlobe. And then kisses pressed against my skin as he works his way to my lips, and then... I try and say his name again, but he captures my lips and I think that's when my mind melted...
Where the hell did he learn to kiss like this?!
I feel like I'm being torn apart, and then suddenly, air rushes back into my lungs. I can breathe again. He has... the most predatory look on his face, as he leans close to me. I feel... weak. My hands slide away from where they still tried with all their might to hold him.
"Shigeru..." I whisper, and then he presses a finger to my lips, shushing me.
"I'm sorry, Satoshi." The look fades, and he looks broken, again. "I..."
"Don't be!" I gasp, clutching at the covers. "I... That was my first kiss..." My earlier question rings in my mind. -Where the hell did he learn to kiss like this?!- That sounds like a good question, so I edit it and repeat it aloud. "Where the hell did you learn to kiss like that?!"
He blinks, and shrugs, tracing a finger gently down the curve of my cheek. He's so warm, and it's not the icky type that chokes the room. It's... I move in against the touch, whimpering as his fingertips brush down my throat, my chest...
"I have a good imagination." Is all he says, and before I question him, he descends and I'm touched with another soul searing kiss. I clutch frantically at the covers, and then he begins to move downwards. I gasp at the touch of lips on my chest, warm like melted butter, trailing a rain of light kisses, and then...
A warm tongue brushes against a nipple, and I find myself gasping again. Half muttered phrases, I'm sure his name is amidst them, but I can't tell anymore. I can't tell...
"A *very* vivid imagination..." He murmurs, and then he descends lower, every new touch lighting me more afire. He... The sound of a button being opened, and then the pull of a zipper. He...
"Shigeru..." I feel like I'm in a sea of sensation, and then I feel the pull of my jeans, and then the warmth of air on bare skin as both they and my boxers are removed; and then... "Shigeru!" I cry, at the feel of his lips descending on my bare flesh. I shiver at the kisses, and then...
"I... want... you..." he whispers again, and I wonder if I should say anything, or else... No, I can't. I want to. But I just *can't*... He doesn't seem to be able to stop himself, because then I find it even more difficult to think as his mouth descends on my erection, and... I try not to buck at the touch, but I can't help myself. And then the slow circles of his tongue, against me, and... "Shigeru..."
I want it to stop, but I *don't* want it to stop...
Soft whimpers come from the depth of his throat. I'm half aware of him clenching fistfuls of the bedspread, because then he's climaxing, and I swallow the taste. I know now... I'll never have enough. I feel like I just addicted myself to a strange and exotic drug...
Because I know this isn't enough. He's writhing in the after effects, and I gather the item from the bedside stand. I *knew* it would be there... I knew it. I gather a pillow as well, it's needed...
"Ne, Sato-chan..." I murmur, leaning down to capture his lips. Let him taste himself on me... "You're going to like this, I promise. I won't hurt you..." He whimpers my name, and it sends shivers down my spine. "Oh Satoshi..." I whisper, and then I kiss him again, long and hard, desperate for the touch...
But I need more.
I situate myself, taking the pillow again and setting it under his hips. And then my attention turns to the tube I hold, and open the cap. I... Why am I even doing this? Oh yes... The desire to have him is balanced by the desire to not hurt him. One gel slicked finger is eased into him, and he whimpers something that I can't make out. My name, maybe, and declarations of love... Or am I just delirious?
He arches, and then, content with the first, I work in the next finger. Did he... he said he loved me, didn't he? I know I love him... I know I've loved him for as long as I can remembered. But we were such idiotic children, and... I know he holds the blame as much as I wish I could take it away from him.
"You're so kind hearted..." I whisper, and passion glazed eyes focus on me. Tears trickle down his cheeks. I'm suddenly afraid I've hurt him, and he sees the sudden desperation.
"It doesn't hurt." His voice cracks, like he's trying to hold back so much more. The tears continue to flow... "It... want more..."
I'm left breathless, and then I focus on my earlier words. "Your heart... the fact that you say you can love me... Just another reason why I love you..." He gasps, and a wondering smile flutters on his cheeks. More tears, again the thought that I hurt him...
"I've wanted to tell you... oooh... for so long..." He whispers, and then he's content to lie and writhe beneath me.
"Sato-chan..." I work in the third finger, and then, and then there's nothing else in my way. It's now or never, and I have to do this. My body won't let me stop. I don't want to stop... I have the idea that if I did, then Satoshi would attempt to hurt me.
I just realised I'm still wearing my clothing. Somewhere in the last minutes, the towel I brought with me fell away. I wipe my hands on it, and then I remove my jeans with as much haste as is possible. He shudders, and I toss the clothing away, and then I'm finally bare and...
I feel more than just a bit than eager, and I need this more than I need to breathe. "I love you." I whisper, promising with those words more than I know I can ever give to him. "I love you so much..." And then I press against him, and he's able to say my name as I press myself in, slow and steady.
"Shigeru, Shigeru..." His words are like a mantra to steady himself, and he clutches at the covers, trying to find a hold, but it doesn't work. He's helpless, defenseless, shuddering and whimpering my name... Oh god, this feels so good.
"More, more!" He begs, as I pause, letting him adjust to my presence. And then I push into him completely, until I feel the need to withdraw and press into him again. "Geru... Shigeru..." His cheeks are still damp with tears, and I wish I could kiss them away. I lean down, hands at his sides, grabbing his own. Fingers twine with my own, and then his mouth blindly seeks out my own...
Savage sweet kisses... "Geru-chan!" He cries, and then I let myself go...
I thrust into him again and again, until I feel myself give, and I have to let myself go completely or else I'll find some way to ruin this moment... I'm aware of another and then another and then I'm gone, almost like an explosion bursting, not contained at all. His name is on my lips as I allow it all to unwind... I pull away from him, and then...
I'm horribly content with what I just did, and I crawl up, pulling him against my chest, crushing him against me. He whimpers, his eyes half closed, dark lashes on pale cheeks... "Satoshi..." I whisper his name against his his hair, and he relaxes. He molds against my body, and I feel sleep tugging at my senses. No, I don't want to. Can't let go now...
But sleep consumes all, and then the darkness is all I'm aware of.
Breathless
The Corrs
Go on, go on
Leave me breathless (leave me breathless)
Come on
Oh yeah
The daylight's fading slowly
The time with you is standing still
I'm waiting for you only
The slightest touch and I'll believe
I cannot lie, from you I cannot hide
I'm losing the will to try
Cant hide it, cant fight it (cant fight it)
So
Don't go
Come on
Leave me breathless
Tease me tease me
Till I can't deny this loving (loving feeling) feeling
Let me long for your kiss
Go on (go on)
Go on (go on)
Yeah
Come on
Yeah
And if there is no tomorrow
And all we have is here and now
I'm happy just to have you
You're all the love I need somehow
It's like a dream
Although I'm not asleep
I never want to wake up
Don't lose it
(don't lose it)
Don't leave it
(don't leave it)
Go on, go on
Come on leave me breathless
Tease me, tease me
Until I cant deny this loving (loving feeling) feeling
Let me long for your kiss
Go on
(go on)
Go on
(go on)
Yeah
Come on
I'm not going to lie
From you I cannot hide
I've lost my will to try
Cant hide it, (ooh) cant fight it (ooh)
Go on
Go on
Come on leave me breathless
tease me tease me
Until I cant deny this loving (loving feeling) feeling
Make me long for your kiss
Go on
Go on
Come on leave me breathless
Go on
Go on
Come on leave me breathless
Go on
Go on
Come on leave me breathless
Go on
Go on
The end