JOURNAL 19


11:06 pm, 05/12/01

subject: some random thoughts

Yes, all my exams are done! What a relief! Right now, I feel like I'm in heaven! But goodness, that Calculus test was so freaking hard! I'll be content with a 3! Anyway, guess I'll just leave everything to God's hands. No need to worry now, huh?!

Can I just say I absolutely LOVE BBMak?! Perhaps more than BSB now...though I'll always be a fan! Their "sonner or later" cd has been one of my all-time favorite since the day I got it, and I just saw their new video "ghost of you and me!" MY GOSH, how can anyone look as hot as Mark?! First of all, I LOVE "ghost," it is kinda creepy, but I like the melody. The weird thing is that I actually read something about Nigel Dick doing a gig at Puerto Rico a while ago on his site; but I didn't know he was shooting a video for BBMak??!! TAKE ME, I will wash your dishes, do your laundry, even take out the trash (all of which I never do...I know, I am so spoil) if you would just let me touch those fine lads! Love the "imports," like...Heath Ledger (hint hint!). Christian used to be my favorite, but Mark just totally blew me away in the video. Awe..I would so marry him! J/K He is definitely in the same rank as Evan now "hotness-wise."

On a different note, I am so in love with Charles Dicken's "Great Expectations." He was a GENIUS; the way he chose and arranged the words...I swear I'm gonna read all his works before I die. Guess what everyone, I've decided to name my first daughter Estella. I don't care if my husband hates it, Estella is it! I've never really thought about baby names until now. Oh, I just have to share the following passage with you:

"Estella, dearest, dearest Estella, do not let Miss Havisham lead you into this fatal step. Put me aside for ever - you have done so, I well know - but bestow yourself on some worthier person than Drummle. Miss Havisham gives you to him as the greatest slight and injury that could be done to the many far better men who admire you, and to the few who truly love you. Among those few, there may be one who loves you even as dearly, though he has not loved you as long as I. Take him, and I can bear it better for your sake!

You are part of my existence, part of myself. You have been in every line I have ever read, since I first came here, the rough common boy whose poor heart you wounded even then. You have been in every prospect I have ever seen since - on the river, on the sails of the ships, on the marshes, in the clouds, in the light, in the darkness, in the wind, in the woods, in the sea, in the streets. You have been the embodiment of every graceful fancy that my mind has ever become acquainted with. The stones of which the strongest London buildings are made are not more real, or more impossible to be displaced by your hands, than your presence and influence have been to me, there and everywhere, and will be. Estella, to the last hour of my life, you cannot choose but remain part of my character, part of the little good in me, part of the evil."

My, don't you just wanna cry after reading this? I know I did. Dickens must have been an extremely romantic guy to have written something like that. This novel makes me wanna to be in love...wake up Joanna, stop dreaming! LOL

Anyway, I think I'm starting to have this obsession with shoes. I've always liked shoes, but not like OBSESSED with them. But lately, everytime I look at heels, esp. those with rhinestone and crystal, I wanna buy them! This is SO BAD of me..I really should be saving money for college now. What is it with women and shoes? I swear it's genetic.

That's enough stuffs for today. Pretty boring huh? Should have warned you. LOL