“It was really cool, you have to try it sometime!” Starr told Jamie and Jason about her experience. It was Monday morning and they were on their way to class. Starr was confused as she looked down and saw Jason’s hand covering Jamie’s. She was talking so much that it slipped right past her. But instead of asking, she fell quiet and sped up her pace.
“Hey.” AJ greeted the threesome as they entered the room just as the bell rang. Starr smiled at him and hopped up the stairs behind Jamie, Jason and some girl that ran in late.
AJ sat and talked to the class, teaching new skills and using some pore, pimple-faced kid as an example. She felt so sorry for him. It looked like he was about to have a nervous break down. Her thoughts turned to Jamie and Jason. They were acting strange, well stranger than normal. It was as if they were a couple. They sat so close, reading each other’s thoughts.
The next few days went by so slow, she almost lost track of what month it was. She had found out that her two friends were a couple. She was unbelievably happy for them, she almost cried.
Starr walked slowly into her room and smiled back at AJ.
“Wow, you don’t like to keep anything empty.” He laughed as he saw no white space left on the wall. Figurines and picture frames, covered every surface. She sat carefully on her bed and watched AJ look at the pictures and teddy bears.
“I know where I’m going to take you this weekend…” She swung her legs back and forth. AJ picked up a heavy metal frame with a picture of her and a boy. She looked about 13 in it. He brought it with him as he sat down next to her. Her long wavy hair kept a bright pink hibiscus flower on top of her ear. Her pinky was intertwined with the boys, who was wearing swimming trunks and a seashell necklace. They both had bright white smiles and looked so perfect, it almost seemed surreal.
“That’s Kalia. I lived in Hawaii until I was 14, then moved to North Carolina. He was my best friend.”
AJ smiled. “You are so beautiful. You never changed.” He examined the picture, and tilted the frame in his hands. He set it lightly on the side table. “So, where are you taking me?” He clasped his hands together and slouched back.
“I called and told the hospital we’re coming in and volunteering Saturday.”
“That’s…that’s good.” His face light up dimly.
“I know. I’ve always had this thing for hospitals. Not like I like them, just this…thing.” She sat Indian style and stared down at the bed spread.
“You’re so sweet.”
She smiled.
“I chose sky diving, and you choose volunteer work…” He held her hand and stroked it lightly. “I never thought I’d fall in love with someone so much younger than me."
“If I was 10 and you were 19, that’d be different. But we’re adults. Believe me, I’ve had my share.” She said sarcastically.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Well, when I was in High School, I was like the neighborhood whore. It was just a hard time for me because my life was falling apart. My parents were going through a terrible divorce; we moved to a whole other place, where I knew no one, so I didn’t have anyone to talk too,” She paused and shifted her sitting position. “It just seemed like everyone, especially guys, liked me better as the girl that gave great head, rather than the girl with the sweet smile and glowing personality.”
AJ grabbed her hand and re-assured her that was in the past.
“Anyway…” She blinked her eyes and whipped the corners.
AJ could see a water line appearing under her eyes. He wanted to stroke them off with his thumb and kiss her in hope she would hurt no longer. Something inside him said, “No, don’t make things worse.” So he sat motionless and silent, watching the painful water pellets drip to her leg, then run onto the bed. His head stayed down as he watched the single tear evaporate in the dark dies that represented the mood in the room.
Starr sniffed and jumped up. “Let’s get Jason and Jamie to go out with us tonight.” She put her hands on her hips and tried extremely hard to push back the past and concentrate on the present and hopefully, her future sitting in front of her.
“Why not.” He nodded and added stepping-stones to the happy trail.
“I won’t see you till Saturday.” AJ frowned and sniffed jokingly.
“Pore baby,” She put her hands on either side of his cheeks, pushing them together making them pouty and slick, then pecked them. “Why?”
“All day tomorrow, I have to watch people try out.” He said.
“Well, have fun. I’ll pick you up at 12:30 on Saturday, ok?”
“I can pick you up if you want.” He gleamed up into the rear view mirror.
“That’s ok. I planned where to go, I’ll drive.” She laughed at the expression on his face when a car cut in front of him.
As they were stopped at a red light on the way to the campus, Starr turned and stared out the window. AJ glanced over at her. Something caught his eye. There was a brownish mark peeking out of the top of her shorts. He saw two edges of something. He hesitated, but reached over and touched it softly. Starr jerked in her seat and started giggling.
“What is that?” He ran two fingers over the soft, warm spot.
“Oh,” She looked down where he was touching and pulled her shorts down a little to reveal a star shaped birthmark on her hip.
“Wow, that’s pretty interesting.”
“Yeah, that’s why my parents named me Starr.” She smiled and let her shorts spring back up from the pressure. “At first, they were going to call me Balinda...thank God for birthmarks...” She looked up at the sky and smiled.
They sat in silence the rest of the way. As they pulled in and parked, they smiled at each other and walked off their separate ways, AJ to pre-pair for class and Starr to her dorm room.
As she walked past Jamie’s room, she could hear her giggling inside. Then a familiar chuckle drowned hers out. She just laughed quietly to herself and jogged the rest of the way to her room. She rushed through the door and stopped as she saw a blinking red light on her answering machine. She scrunched her eyebrows in curiosity and pressed the play button.
“Starr! It’s Howie. I have some really good news for you. But I’d rather tell you face to face or on the phone. Call me.” It clicked and started beeping repeatedly.
Excitement over took her body. She bolted into her room and scrimmaged through her backpack, overnight bag that she took to AJ’s and her desk. Finally, she found his cell number scribbled on a napkin. She ran to her phone and dialed it so fast, she almost missed the buttons. It rang, and rang, and rang, and-
“Starr!”
“Hey! What’s the news?!”
“I don’t know if I should tell you…” He joked, making her anticipation run wild.
“Just tell me-“
“I got you an audition!” Howie started laughing in her happiness.
She started breathing really hard, trying to let it sink in. Her first audition…she had tried so many times to just get an interview to audition.“Thank you so much. I really appreciate this.”
“No problem babe. Sorry I wasn’t there last night, I was out. I wanted to tell you, but I met someone, so I was kinda busy.” He bragged.
She asked and asked about her, losing track of time. “Shit How, I gotta go!” She realized that class was about to start. They hung up and she ran in and up to her seat. A huge smile had been planted on her face for good. It was on all day, no matter what she said, what was said to her or what happened. She couldn’t wait till lunch to tell AJ.
“Howie called me this morning…” She fluttered her permanent smile. They were in a small Italian restaurant, with peanut shells that almost looked powdered all over the ground. There was decorated dollar bills plastering the walls and neon signs hanging in the windows, advertising beer and karioke night.
“Really? What did you all talk about?” He opened the menu and examined the rows. “Do you want a pizza?”
“He told me some really good news. Sure.” She waited for him to ask her what was so important after the waitress set 2 cokes in front of them.
He didn’t, so she burst out “He got me an audition for a movie!”
A wave of life slapped AJ in the face. “That’s great!”
“I know, I’m so excited-“She cut off so AJ could give the young girl their order. She noticed the strange look on the waitress’s face as she was taking the order. When she walked away, Starr laughed.
“What?” He looked shocked.
“Either that girl recognizes you or something’s hanging out of your nose…” She smiled and sucked on her straw.
“She’s probably just a weirdo. So, what’s it an audition for?”
“Omigod, I didn’t even ask him…” She said to herself. “Probably a commercial…but hopefully a movie.”
He shook his head.
Starr followed AJ into his house. She abruptly looked around, trying to find Howie. She spotted him lounged on the couch and ran to his side. Howie just continued to stare at the TV with a huge grin across his face. She looked at him, vibrating with excitement. He clicked the TV off and turned slowly facing her.
“The audition I got is in San Jose. And it’s for a commercial, Neutrogena. I know it’s not very big, but galaxE started out by playing at weddings and funerals...” He laughed and reached for his brief case lying against the couch. After searching through papers, he pulled out a pink flyer with bold yellow writing across the top. She examined it and came to find it was for new talent. “I decided not to go this way...” He refereed to the talent agency advertised on the sheet. “Closure is what you need right now. I’m almost certain you’ll make this one,” He paused and sent serious eyes creeping through his brown expression. “I don’t want you to get too sure about this...it’s your first audition, you might not make it.”
“What are my chances?”
“40/60. But there’s more bums on the highway(L.A. talk). There will be WAY more to come.” “I trust you...and that conception. I will try my hardest to make this one.”
AJ sat quietly in the armchair next to the couch. He observed the business talk, but eventually drifted into his thoughts. He wondered if they would make it to a one-month anniversary. True, it’s not something he should be thinking about this early, but he wanted too, and he felt he should. Suddenly, a thought slipped through the cracks. He had changed a lot since the Backstreet days. He was a total different person then. That business made him someone he always promised he wouldn’t become if they made it big. Everyone involved said that during his or her big break, but it diminished the second their head started growing fat. He started worrying about Starr. Would she let fame get to her? He new she was defiantly in. She had everything, she was the right “material”. But she was so sweet, he didn’t know why he was considering it, but he felt he had to think for the worst.
“AJ!” Starr sat at his feet with a frustrated moan in her voice.
“Sorry, I was just lost in my thoughts.” He smiled at her and leaned close to her face. “Yes?”
She eyed him suspiciously and sat next to him. “I was just checking to see if you’re alive...we’re flying out Sunday to San Jose. Are you gonna come or...”
“I don’t think I can, I have work.” He reminded her, upset he couldn’t join her.
“Damn, I forgot about that.” She lowered her head, trying to think of a plan. “Well...I guess I’ll have to go without you.”
“You’ll be fine.” He smiled and kissed her cheek.