I'm in brackets and non-bold...
Christina Slams Big Names In Teen Music (A big mistake that will cost her. See, generally when people see their favorite bands being dissed by someone who follows the media image of what a woman should be, then they start to re-evaluate how much they like a particular artist. Take me for example. Although I never liked Christina and I probably never will, her “dissing” and categorizing the people that I like made me disrespect her even more than I usually do. Thus, this report. Also keep in mind that I think dissing people for dissing people is fun, fun, fun.)
"I can tell my taste has changed since I released my first single," (Really? Well I guess that’s why “Come On Over” actually sucked more than “Genie In A Bottle.” Go figure.) gushes Christina backstage before a charity event in New York.( The charity event was “Save the Whales.”) "I mean, I liked the Britney's and the Mandy's (What the heck??? She is a Britney and a Mandy. In fact, the only reason why she changed her look from the mature, short-haired, shy Disney girl to the Britney Spears slutty “I am woman, see my boobs” motif was because Britney had gotten so big. *Gasp* could she be saying that she doesn’t even like to listen to her own music?) and the boy bands (stereotypical much?), but I'm shifting to more hard rock stuff." (that would explain the R&B-gospel attempt on your latest album. Which, by the way, sucked so bad that it didn’t even go anywhere on Canadian charts. Perhaps that’s why she needed to team up with Ricky Martin. She didn’t a single and he needed a way to prove his masculinity. Which kind of had the reverse effect - the single was boring, and when Ricky and Christina stand together you can’t help but think about how feminine he looks. But that’s a whole other rant.)
"Like the new Backstreet album, I don't like it at all. If I were Jive records I would have been embarrassed to put my name on it." (Okay, if you’re going to say something like that, at least have a reason. That’s another thing I can’t stand. Like the “Backstreet Boys are gay” thing. It’s waaaay over done. I must have heard it a thousand times. Anyway, I can think of a reason why someone like her might not like the album. Actually, I can think of two. One, the material is faster than it usually is. Christina loves the ballads. Usually. Then again that doesn’t really explain that rock stuff she was talking about earlier. She’s just so jealous that she couldn’t get her ballads off the ground. But think about it, when do you listen to ballads, and why or how would you listen to an album that is entirely comprised of ballads. I was at a sleepover once, and her “I Turn To You” song was on the chart. I really couldn’t get to sleep that night because I was waiting for the Backstreet Boys to come up and my friend was snoring. Well, thanks to her and her boring ballad, she put me to sleep and I missed my Boys! This has never happened to me before. I’m the type who can’t fall asleep unless it’s in their own bed, and she put me to sleep... go figure. Reason number two: She’s just jealous, jeeeaaallllouuuussss. That would actually be the perfect name for a song of hers - but then again I can’t see something like that as a ballad so she’s out of luck again. Reason number three because reason two wasn’t all that good: She hasn’t really had a success since “Genie.” Admit it, that was her break-out song. The Backstreet Boys have had plenty: Backstreet’s Back, As Long As You Love Me, All I Have To Give, I Want It That Way... basically every single they’ve had out so far. That’s really hard to contend with. Reason number four because I’m on a roll now: Her fan base. I’ve thought about this long and hard but the question still remains in my mind: “Who the heck likes to sing for a bunch of nine-year-old boys and some girls? Why on earth would a girl scream for another girl to sing, or scream while the female performer is touching herself and dressing with nothing at all? Come on girls! The problem is Christina wants more members of the opposite sex in the audience and probably more of legal age, but her music limits that. Thus, the rock thing. The Backstreet Boys have some dudes in their audience and no, they’re not all gay. And they certainly don’t scream for the boys. So why would girls scream for girls like that besides the obvious reason. And if Christina was so big, then she wouldn’t have done that lowly “Psycho Blast Tour.” Now the only reason why I’m saying that it’s lowly is because the performers in it weren’t that big and they weren’t going to the huge popular places in Canada or the big stadiums. As far as being embarrassed about putting names on labels, Christina should look down at her half-dressed self and think very, very hard about what she said. ) Christina is set to release her second album summer 2001 and had this to say about it: "It's going to be different, a lot different, people are going to gave to turn up the speakers and listen for a bit before they can tell it's me. (Then how come I knew... I hate your music!) The tunes are going to be jammin' (They really weren’t “jammin.’” They were more “slammin’” right into t’ garbage can ‘n stayin’ there! Sorry that was bad. I hate it when people use popular terms to lie about their music) and I'm not only going to make my fans happy, but everyone else as well." (Then how come I thought you were so stinking miserable that I had to write this article? )
Interviewer: What do you think about Britney? (gets pissed at interviewer: “Stop asking about Britney!” )
Christina: Don't get me wrong, I love her to death (well that’s just wrong), it's just that her new album sounds a lot like her first (that’s because it is almost)... And I'm a firm believer that when you release new material, it's supposed to be 110% better than the one before! (with her new album it was the other way around. She recorded her first songs when she was sane, thus the change).
Interviewer: You have been heard saying that you really dislike the new Backstreet album and the new look some of them are sporting, is this true? (Yeah, this interview must think she’s a real big *****. And also in their future a big promotion for getting this kind of info out of the big dope-smoking *****).
Christina: Well, let me just say...(NOOO NO!! Okay go ahead..) Don't let any of them tell you they are doing their own thing, their record label is telling them the way to dress, how to sing, how to act...(how the heck do you know? Are you spying on my Boys? Do you really care so much about how they dress that you have to make a comment like that? I mean, it’s not like your label isn’t making you dress the way you are. You haven’t been following the Boys through the years so you don’t know anything. They are dressing the way they feel - not in uniform and definately not in bellow-hip-hugging jeans. Has your label told you to dress sluttily today? Besides, what incentive would the BSB have for “lying” about something as immaterial as clothing? Before, when they didn’t have their freedom, they moved away from the company. But she wouldn’t know this, she just likes to stick her ugly nose where it doesn’t belong. And who is telling you to say these things? Could it be that you need to pull a big scandel before releasing your new single? Plus, I don’t let anybody tell me anything I don’t want to hear. For example, you Christina. I’m not letting you get away with saying that without a rant. This is old stuff. It happened to them before, but now they have control. Think Nsync if you want to say something like that.) Maybe even who to date. (Now that’s some real BS. Two of them are married, how can you say that?) The new album sounds just like the last one, I don't see how they can seriously say it's more "mature than the last".(Have you even listened to the album? Have you even listened to your own albums? Let me tell you now, you’re the one blowing chunks. Your taste in music sucks and that reflects on your own albums. She’s getting the Britney attitude now. For the record, the album is assembled the same as Millennium, which is basically for the fans to predict which single will be next. The songs are much faster and the ballads are smashing. More Than That is a great radio song. Can’t say the same for any of Christina’s songs.) And what is up with Kevin? He looks like the picture in my head I have of Satan! (laughs) (Now I take severe offense to that. I MET Kevin and he means a lot to me for what he did. He went outside GM Place to sign autographs for every fan who caught on to where he was, and that included me. There were at least forty people there. He even signed autographs for a bum and took an environmental poster from a lady who was being pushy about it and he even laughed with us. He was so human and so gentle. It was like magic to me. And he wasn’t putting on any acts and don’t convince me otherwise. How can someone like that be compared to a DEVIL? The image in her mind of the devil should be me: Fingernails so long I have to type sideways and painted blood-red and a Stephen King addict whose obession is thinking of brand new ways to kill people in her stories. Be afraid... And anyway, she’s the image that comes to my mind when I think of a slut. Whorey checkered pants, waaaaaaayyyyyyyyy too much makeup (it looks like her make-up artist had to go pee very bad and just painted blue circles around her eyes and told her that it looked good so that he could visit the urinal. But that’s just my opinion.), obession with Britney Spears, anorexia nervosa (no offense to those who have it, recovering myself), belly-button exposure, big boobs (or tits as the guys in my gym class so delicately put it), little or no clothes, big mouth, stringy straight blonde hair and the sex appeal pre-pub boys. No offense to any prostitutes, because of of them do not have a sex appeal to pre-pub boys except if they are in porno mags. But I know nothing about that subject. She wants to make comparisons, then she should look at my reasons that she is a whore. And believe me, that’s not a word I just throw around. I mean business when I say that, and when I say that she totally deserved it.)
Interviewer: So you don't like the new album? Christina: I like 2 or 3 songs, like the one Howie wrote, that song is absolutely amazing. (Do you even know which one that is? I’m curious. Oh, and take a note - “the one that Howie wrote” is a ballad. Go figure... Oh and it's called "What Makes You Different Makes You Beautiful... Christina must be having some self-esteem issues...)
Interviewer: Mandy Moore has been quoted as saying she admires your voice, but she'd rather stick to the Jessica Simpsons of the world, what does that mean to you? (Mandy Moore doesn’t diss my Boys so she’s cool with me. So far.)
Christina: That she doesn't like me.(Many other people feel the same way.) (laughs) It doesn't bother me, I have to put up with 15 year olds like her everyday. (If she’s lucky. I mean most people who go to her concerts aren’t even that old. I’m just saying this based on the TV special I saw. Don’t get me wrong, I usually don’t use the age thing as a factor because some people that age are really cool. But, I can’t really say that if you’ve been to her concert. Whatever suits you *shrugs*)
Interviewer: Will there be a 5th single?(NNOOOO GOD NOOOO!!!)
Christina: We will know sometime in January, if so it will no doubt be "So Emotional". (*rolls eyes* another sappy crappy ballad. She has a voice and she could do much more with it than diss other people.)
Side note: Have you seen her lately? I shouldn’t have even made a rant about her. Looking like that is punishment enough...