BUNNY _SCENE- in house by costume rack -QT-i wanna be the dragon -MICKEY-uh-uh I'm the dragon, ha-ha, 1 blast from this mother, the audience will be dead and medium rare at the same time! -BRUMER-this a benefit for a children's hospital, lets not offend the tikes in the burnward! ____QT AND JERRY REACH FOR THE TIGER COSTUME- JERRY GETS IT 1ST_____ -QT-hey! -JERRY-a tiger would totally kick a dragon's ass! ___QT REACHES 4 THE TURKEY COSTUMER, DOUG GETS IT__ -QT-ddoouuuggg!! -DOUG-ha ha yea they're tough but a turkey will slice yah in two! yyaahh! _____REACHES FOR SPIDER, CHAD TAKES IT OUT OF HIS HANDS_______ -CHAD-spiders are viscous killers that devour their young! but my spiders nice, he only eats pizza! _______QT IS LEFT WITH HTE BUNNY SUIT_________ -QT- this sucks bunnies dont eat anybody! i dont wanna be a stupid bunny! I'm sick of being treated like a little kid! -BRUMER- IM telling you as senior VP of what-ev records that you are wearing the bunny suit and you will like it! -QT-yea? well I'm telling you as qt, that you can take this bunny suit, turn it sideways, and shove it straight up your candy ass! -MICKEY-oooh! -BRUMER-i believe you boys are going to the Mandy Moore concert tonight? _ALL- yyeeeaa!! -BRUMER-you dont wanna miss meeting mandy do you? -QT- no way! -BRUMER- thats what i thought and thats why your grounded! -QT- you cant tell me what to do! im thru with taking orders! im the master of my own destiny!!!!!!!!!!! (stomps and pouts) ________________INTRO- MUSIC- 2GETHER_____________ ___________________SCENE- IN CHAD AND DOUGS ROOM_________________ -CHAD- when mandy sings the truth i taste the truth, it touches my soul. plus she has the cutest feet! what do i say to a girl like that? -DOUG (AT COMP)- relax... im finding out what she likes, just talk about that and you'll be fine! Mandy Moore iiiss an adventurer who loves roller coasters! -CHAD- (EXCITED) i love roller coasters! Except when I throw up into the wind! -DOUG-born in new Hampshire her real name is Amanda, her favorite food is cotton candy and she hates war! -CHAD-cool! Look me up I wanna know what my favorite food is! -DOUG- there's something here about you and soap! -CHAD- thetas weird 'cause I have always hated eating soap! -DOUG-no, someone found a half used bar of soap in a hotel room you stayed at and they're selling it on ebay for $50.00! -CHAD- well somebody must like eating soap! -DOUG-Chad, you touched soap and its worth money! ___________________SCENE- ALL BUT QT READY TO LEAVE__________________ -MICKEY- dont worry "q" you aint missin' much -DOUG- yea we're not even that excited about the concert -JERRY AND CHAD WALK PAST QT WITH A HUGE "WE LOVE MANDY" SIGN- -QT- come on! you gotta let me go!! -BRUMER- (PICKS UP QT) im sorry that request cannot be completed as dialed. -QT-you cant do this! im a make a wish kid and i wish to go with them! ______________SCENE- QT BORED IN HIS ROOM_________________ -QT- (PLANS AN ESCAPE, MAKES THE BED LIKE HE IS ASLEEP IN IT, PUTS ON HIS BACKSTAGE PASS, CLIMBS TOWARDS THE WINDOW, DOES THE SIGN OF THE CROSS, OPENS THE WINDOW LOOKS DOWN AND IS SCARED, JUMPS AND IS RELIEVED, GETS ON HIS SCOOTER AND RIDES IT TO THE CONCERT) ___________SCENE BACKSTAGE AT THE MANDY CONCERT______________ -FANS- SOUND- SCREAMING!!!!! -MANDY- hi, i'm sorry, guys i cant, and I have to go, hi, hi! Hello! hi!(basically hi's) -CHAD-remind me again doug... -DOUG- New Hampshire, roller coasters, cotton candy. -CHAD- (REPEATS SILENTLY TO HIMSELF) -MANDY-*SEES 2GETHER* oh! omg you guys are 98 degrees i love you!! you guys are so hot! -MICKEY- hell no! we aint no steroid poppin' boy band! shoot, we're 2gether! -MANDY- oh, oh, oh, oh! but you guys are way better, much hotter!! -AMANDA - oma! You're Mandy Moore! -MANDY- oh, what's your name? -AMANDA- Amanda -MANDY-oh cool! That's like me do, do you want an autograph? -AMANDA- oh (walks away) -JERRY-Mandy everyone loves you but Chad here is your biggest fan! -CHAD- cotton candy! -MANDY- um, no no no no no where' the, the cute one he is my favorite, what he is like 13 or something? -CHAD- roller coasters!! -MANDY-pardon me? -CHAD- you love war (rolls eyes) you hate war! -DOUG- listen, we could chat like this all day, but we really gotta go! ___________________SCENE- BACK AT 2GETHERS HOME_____________________ -MICKEY- damn im hungry! -JERRY- hey qt! Brought you a T-shirt! -CHAD- qt want one of my glow sticks? -DOUG-qt! -JERRY- (KNOCKS ON THE DOOR) -DOUG- (TRIES TO OPEN IT) there will be no locked doors in this house young man! -JERRY- maybe he's hot in there! -CHAD- maybe he got eaten by coyote! -DOUG- qt? Come on open up! Qt? i'm goin' in! (OPENS DOOR) -CHAD- ooohhhh! its okay he's just sleepin', qt? (pulls down sheet annddd...) nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -MICKEY-wassup? somebody uh get wacked? -JERRY- hey nobody got wacked except maybe qt. CHAD- nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _____BACK FROM THE COMMERCIAL BREAK_____ -CHAD- remember the time when he wouldnt put on the bunny costume? And remember the time he couldn't come with us to see Mandy Moore? Those were the good times (sad). -JERRY- Chad, he's fine! There's no way he's lying on the side of the road somewhere, twisted mass of flesh and metal! There's no way he's... -DOUG- all right! All right! Just calm down! Just settle down here! All right! Now let's not get freaked out about this! Okay! theres still a small chance that qt's still alive! -MICKEY- ddaammnnn! yo corps boy's got some bangin' tunes, oh dmx, i've been lookin' 4 this! hee ha-ha! ____SOUND- DOOR OPEN AND DOOR__- ALL 4 GUYS RUN TO SEE WHO IT IS____ -CHAD- qt! he's alive! he's alive! -JERRY- qt you scared the hell outta us! -DOUG- where on earth have you been? -QT- on a date with Mandy Moore! -MICKEY- huh? -DOUG-hold on! you what? -QT- i went to the concert, and met Mandy backstage. We clicked and what can I say, like two mature adults, we started a relationship. -JERRY-exactly uh, what kind of relationship? -QT-well, lets just say, I made out with not one but both of her hands! And for our second date, she's coming over for dinner tomorrow night! -MICKEY- dude! You got sskiillllss! _______SCENE-IN CHAD AND DOUGS ROOM, DOUG ON COMP______________ -DOUG- 72 people just bid on one of your chewed up pens! and your retainer just sold for 200 bucks!! -CHAD- wow! I bet your old football jacket's going for 3 zillion! -DOUG- he-he lets see! (sad) 16 cents! -CHAD-oh, maybe we should sell dad's suit! -DOUG-have some respect! Dad was buried in that suit! Here, chew these (hands him some gum) but don't swallow! ____SCENE- QT GETTING READY FOR HIS DATE. SCENE- IN KITCHEN____ -JERRY-whoa! Freddie Prinze jr. in the flesh! -QT-just cleaned up a little, those are for Mandy! -CHAD- sorry -DOUG-here yah go buddy (hands him a carrot, he takes a bite, Doug takes it back and puts it in a bag) _____________SOUND- DOORBELL_________________ -JERRY- it's Mandy Moore! -QT-stay cool okay? And don't embarrass! -CHAD- you heard what he said okay, nobody vomit! ____QT OPENS DOOR___ -QT- hey baby, guys, this is Mandy. ~GUYS CONFUSED~ -QT-don't be shy, you can call her Amanda like her friends do! -"MANDY"-hee-hee hi! -QT- she's even prettier in person huh? -DOUG- like an entirely different person! -JERRY- different, which reminds me, the patio is a different place, we should go check it out! ____GUYS RUN TO THE PATIO_______ -CHAD-you guys before we talk, there's something I need to tell you. That is not Mandy Moore! -MICKEY-i say we rock paper scissors who gets to tell freak boy 1st, on 2nd though no, ha! I win! -JERRY- we can't tell him! Look how happy he is! -MICKEY- look how happy I'll be when I tell him! yea, hee hee! -CHAD-we can't tell him! Remember when they stopped making beanie babies? He went into a coma! -MICKEY-oooh! bonus! -DOUG-maybe we didnt make our argument completly clear, if you dont go along with us, we'll kick you bleached blonde ass! _______SCENE- DINNER TABLE__________ -MICKEY-Mandy, I am honored to have you chillin' in my house girl! -"MANDY"- im honored, i've never been in the home of someone so famous before! -QT-you dont have to lie to make us feel good! -CHAD- yea, leave that to us! -"MANDY"-ha-ha! ________AWKWORD SILENCE, EVERYONE LAUGHS________ -CHAD-ssoooo amanda, what do you like to do? -JERRY- you know, when your not doin' what you mainly do! -DOUG-like at night, after you go to bed! -"MANDY"- oh, well lately, I have been dreaming alot about budgets! -QT-budgets? -"MANDY"-yea, i totally wanna make my highschools young economics club! -QT-oh so you can figure out how to handle all your money. -"MANDY"-all my money? ha,i dont even have a job! -DOUD-ha-ha, i think what she means is performing isnt really a job, its yah know a, a calling! -"MANDY"-what do you mean performing? -JERRY- well, performing chores, like doin' the dishes.. -CHAD(EXCITED)- or taking out the garbage! -DOUG- not that you take out your own garbage! -"MANDY"- oh! i do! i take out the recycling and the garbage every thursday! -QT-i told yah she was down to earth! -JERRY-you ain't kiddin -DOUG-oohh yea! -CHAD- ooohh that was close! -QT-mandy! i have to tell you, "candy" is pretty much my favorite song ever! -"MANDY"- mine too! did you know that mandy moore put her best friend in that video? -DOUG- oh, oh right yea, when you become big you refer to yourself in the 3rd person. everybody's doing it! "doug loves cotton candy." -CHAD- so does mandy moore! I mean you do! I mean she does! I mean they do ! -JERRY-shut up Chad! -CHAD- but I fixed it this time! -JERRY-your blowin' it! -DOUG- everybody stay coool. -MICKEY- oh, i am lovin this! -QT- guys whats goin' on? -"MANDY"- ha- ha im confused! -MICKEY- lemme break it down for you kids... -CHAD- mickey no! -MICKEY- this girl, over here! -DOUG- this chick! deserves a song! -QT- i'd rather talk! -"MANDY" oh, i would love it if you guys would sing for me, that would make my entire life! ____THEY ALL GET UP AND STAND IN A ROW AND GET READY_____ -ALL 5- i wanna know your name -JERRY- i wanna know your name -ALL 5- i wanna know everything about you, drivin' me insane, i wanna know your naaamme. how can i let you know, i wanna get right next to you.. (later- guys tired, still singin) drivin' me insane, i wanna know your name! -"MANDY"-that was even better than the 1st 12 times! -DOUG- thanx! -"MANDY"- i mean who woulda thought that an ordinary.. -DOUG- oohhh! one two! -ALL- wanna know your name -JERRY- i wanna know your name -QT- guys! guys, can we ppplllease! just talk? -DOUG-sing! -ALL-i wanna know your name -JERRY- i wanna know your name -ALL i wanna know everything about you! ___SOUND- HONK HONK!!!______ -"MANDY" thats my mom -DOUG- goodbye! -LAUGH- -CHAD- amanda, there's something i wanna give you, chad gum! (puts gum in her hand) 79.50! -"MANDY" thanks.. I think, hee-hee -QT- come on, i'll walk yah to the door, so me and you can have some private time! -JERRY- bye bye now! ooohh we did it! -DOUG- made qt feel like a man, kept his lil boy dreams alive. -MICKEY- mmm huh! -MICKEY- ha- ha, what up big papa? -QT- i just majorly scored!!!! -JERRY- with her mom right there? -QT-better than that! mandy moore agreed to perform with us at the hospital benefit! so who's the little bunny now! *snap snap* huh? ___BACK FROM COMMERCIAL BREAK____ -JERRY- you invited that girl to sing in our show? what were you thinking?!? -QT- i was thinkin' it'd be great for the band! -MICKEY- i outta shove you in the microwave and put your ass on high!!!! -QT- i cant believe this! i get mandy moore on stage with us! and your still treating me like a useless little kid (cries) i thought you'd finally be proud of me. -DOUG- qt, sometimes in a man's life, things arent always what they seem. -JERRY- good, run with that -DOUG-uh, sometimes in a man's life (qt whips a tear) things are different than what they seem. -CHAD- and tonight, there was something very much like that! -JERRY- well put! -MICKEY- this whole thing with you and mandy!!! -QT- what? -MICKEY- it seems like we're not proud of you. but, actually we really in awe of you! -QT- really? -JERRY- i mean you got mandy moore right? -QT- so she can do the show with us? -DOUG- ha-ha, well sure!!! and thanx! -QT- just glad i could help, i'm gunna go wash my face. -DOUG- ha -ALL- we're screwed! ___________SCENE- CHAD AND DOUGS ROOM, CHAD ON COMP____________ -DOUG- any ebay action? -CHAD- the guy who bought my retainer is re-selling it for 700! i never realized that retainer was so special! -DOUG- chad, its just an old piece of plastic! you havent worn that thing in 4 years! -CHAD- 750!!! i've gotta get it back! that retainer fit my mouth perfectly! like it was made for me! -DOUG- it waass made for you! -CHAD- actually it was made for my friend chris, but he never used it so i was like hey free retainer! -DOUG- ugh! ___SCENE CHILDRENS HOSPITAL_____ -QT- got everything you need? -"MANDY"- well, i'm a little nervous about going out infront of all those people -QT- i still get nervous everytime too! -"MANDY"- could i practice a little for you? -QT- are you kidding? please! -"MANDY"- ahem, (in a horrible voice) i wanna know your name, i wanna know everything about you, hee hee how was that? -QT-(SHOCKED) your joking right? ____IN A DIFFERENT ROOM WHERE ALL THE COSTUMES ARE____ -CHAD- i got it back!!!!!!!!! isnt it beautiful? -JERRY- its a retainer! -CHAD- i had to sell the sound system but it was worth it! -DOUG- you sold our stereo? that was worth way more than that stupid retainer!! -CHAD- no way! that stereo was never in my mouth! okay once but only for a second! -MICKEY-the hell with this! i'm gunna go take care of amanda, like areal man, he-he! -QT-guys, i got some bad news -JERRY- what is it? -QT-mandy moore! she has no singing talent at all! she must lip sync all her stuff! -DOUG-that is an outrage! -QT- i cant let a big poser like that, go on stage with us! -DOUG-hooohh, you want me to break the news to her? -QT- no, the mature thing to do is just tell her myself. (walks out) ____GUYS REALLY HAPPY!____ ~QT- looking around for "mandy"~ -QT- amanda? -----IN A HALLWAY- MICKEY MAKING OUT WITH "MANDY" (He tells her to wait in a room and she leaves)------ -QT-amanda? mandy! -MANDY MOORE- hey, were you lookin' for me? -QT- no, but hi! -MANDY- ah, you know what, i've been lookin' for you. i came here to meet the cute one. -QT-here i am -MANDY- so who were you lookin' for? i need to know who i have to kill! -QT- actually, i was just about to tell a major pop star that she couldnt sing with us,' cause she's a fake! guess she chickened out and ran home! -MANDY-you know what, its pretty unbelievable how many famous people are really just scared and empty inside -QT- totally! -MANDY- i just wanna be with somebody who's funny, down-to-earth, and a real qt. -QT- you exactly the type of girl i should of been with all along! just an honest regular girl. -MANDY- that makes you even cuter (kisses him on the cheek) so you wanna go see a movie sometime? maybe even a pg-13? -QT- i'm sorry, its too soon, i'd just be rebounding, but your one special lady (kissers hand) *walks to costume room* you guys got my bunny suit? -DOUG- I thought you werent gonna wear that fluffball get up? -QT- a real man can wear a bunny suit, no problem. -CHAD- and a retainer too! -MICKEY- ha- ha, girlie girl's out for the count! *music starts to play* lets hit it! _____SCENE-CONCERT- MUSIC- I WANNA KNOW YOUR NAME_____ -DOUG-come on come on come on... CHAD- ooohhhh -DOUG- come on come on come on ALL- i wanna know your name... -QT- i never knew, that love could put a spell on me. then you walked into the room yeeaa, ooh! -CHAD- what to do, should i let my package show? or should i try and play it coooolll! -JERRY- i've been pullin', i've been playin', for so long my hearts been waiting... to finally love someone like yyyoouuuu! oh! -MICKEY- now my hearts anticipating all the love we could be makiiinnngg, i gotta get this message tthhrrruu! -ALL- i wanna know your name... -JERRY- i wanna know your name! yyeeaa! -ALL- i wanna know everything about you! drivin' me insane, i wanna know your name! how can i let you know? -JERRY- how can i let you know -ALL- i wanna get right next to you, checkin' the way you flow, i wanna know your name! -QT- tell me now! where have you been all my life? or are you really just a ddreeeaam? -CHAD-you know i'm down,anything you want to do. so wont you come and go with mee! -----------WALKS INTO THE AUDIENCE---------------- *CHAD GIVES A GIRL HIS RETAINER, SHE PUTS IT IN HER MOUTH* -ALL- i wanna know your name, i wanna know everything about you. drivin' me insane -MICKEY- drivin' me insane! -ALL- i wanna know your name! how can i let you know? i wanna get right next to you. checking the way you flow. -MICKEY-checking the way you flow -ALL- i wanna know your name -CHAD-i want you -JERRY-i want you -CHAD- i need you -JERRY-i need you -CHAD- i'd really like to please you, you got it -ALL-you got it -CHAD-i need it -ALL-i need it -CHAD-its time that you believe it -MICKEY-yyeeaa! -DOUG-you looking so fine tonight baby, i just wanna drive you around in my viper! yeeaa!