The Beach
'And thats how you were born' said Jacob as he finished off his explanation for the 4th time that hour.
'Wow' was all Dan could say. 'So what if the stork gets in traffic?' he asked.
'God Dan you're so stupid! i cant believe your mum didnt tell you this stuff? do i look like a mother you sad pathetic freak?! Well? WELL!?'
'No Jacob sir' said Dan putting his head down.
'jacob...dont you think its time you told him the truth about how he ws born?' asked Trevor before ducking for cover.
'What! well ok you tell him' said Jacob as he stormed out of the hotel muttering something about not being appreciated and how if he was solo none of this would have happened.
'Ok ,' began Trevor ' so the mummys pee pee and the daddys snake........' his voice trailed off as Ashley and Erik entered the lobby holding hands.
'Er guys? not in public eh?' said Trevor. Ashley and Erik quickly let go of each other and got into manly mode.
'Hey what up man?' asked Ash
'Yeah i was just going to explain about the process of life to little Danny here,Jacob stormed off on his daily stress-capade....thats about it. How are you guys?'
'I feel so good!' smiled Erik before winking at Ashley.
'Yah me too. That 7 hour shower I just took has totally refreshed me, i wont need another for at least another half an hour now'.
Just then Laguna, the hotel guard,(i have no idea what context o use this in so this is all i can come up with), came running into the lobby in such a sweat that everyone thought he had just been targetted by George Michael for a nudey romp in the public lavatories.
'Hey everyone theres a monkey stuck in the ocean!' Everyone dashed out of the lobby leaving the guys looking confused.
'Monkey?' said Erik
'Hey this has gotta be funny, a monkey in the sea, lets go!' shouted Dan running off closely followed by the other guys.
When they got onto the beach they pulled up a deckchair and got in a good place to watch the show. The monkey bobbed about on a green bouy that he had obviously looked to for support. It was shouting something, but all the guys could make out were , 'sh!t', 'jesus' and 'i'm gonna be michael jackson one day' Something looked familiar about that monkey.But what was it?
'OH MY GOSH!' screamed Trevor, 'THATS NOT A MONKEY..THATS JACOB!!!' he exclaimed much to the other guys disbelief.
'you're right!' shouted Ashley ' Quick we have to help him'
'O-TOWN SCUBBA SQUAD TO THE RESCUE' shouted Erik. Everyone on the beach looked on as the four guys quickly changed into scubba gear and pulled out their trusty pedalos before breaking into a chorus of ' comin to the rescue'. They jumped on and still singing dashed out to the helpless monkey....i mean jacob. When they got over there they were greeted by a warm caring and gratefull Jacob.
'What the hell took you guys so long you fools?' he screamed at them.
'Sorry Jacob, we had to sing before we could come....standard precidure..you understand' explained Trevor.
'Guys how....do...you....aaaarrggghhh!!!' Dan fell off his pedalo and began flapping about like a sardine.
'Geez you guys , come on lets go i want a shower' moaned Ashley pulling Dan onto his bike.
'Jacob get on mine mate' said Trevor.
So Jacob climbed on and they all rode back to the beach. The people cheered as they got there. and although they had to tell the zoo keeper that it was actually their bandmate and not an escaped monkey that had gotten in a mess, everyone was happy that they were all ok. They all trundled back upto their hotel rooms. By this ime it was 4 o'clock. Ashley went to get a shower and told the guys he would see them tomorrow, Trevor went to work on his torso, Dan watched re-runs of emmerdale farm and Erik went to watch Ashley in the shower. Jacob however was still feeling a bit stupid after wha had happened and so went to write a song about it on his harmonica. It was entitled 'Buoy do i feel dumb' and was released as his firt solo song. It reached number 9864 in the charts, a good finish to his solo carrer if you ask me. The other guys let him back in O-Town after a bit of begging and housework and so they carry on.
~~~~The End~~~~~© Beccy.T 2001/2002