The One With Jay



'Duffle coat duffle coat ima wearin a duffle coat' sang Erik as he gave Ashley a private modelling session in his bedroom. He had been showing Ashley all of his brand spanking new gear for when he went to visit his eskimo relatives at the North Pole. He didn't really want to leave Ashley in the house with the guys...and Dan, but what else could he do. His family needed him and they were serving Beef , how could he refuse beef? Anyway as he packed all of his socks and bloomers, he couldnt help but shed a tear as he put his fave picture of himself and Ashley at the birdwatching show into his pink handbag.
'I'm gonna miss you sweetie' said Erik as he leant over and gave ashley a hug. 'You too babe, but dont worry, just stick to the plan and you'll be home in no time.You do remeber the plan right?'
'Yeah of course i do.Eat the beef,pretend i'm dying,i get to come home.Easy as pie....which you must make for my return' he smiled. He carried on packing whilst Ashley went to get a quick 3 hr shower before they had to go to the airport. At the airport there was much hugging going on.
'Dan you're not going anywhere, quit with the hugging!' shouted Jacob.
'I know but i love you guys so much!' he wept.
'Bye honey pie cutie baby twinkle toes' smiled Ashley.
'Bye baby waby sweetie meaty' Erik said back. Trevor ran off into the mens bathroom to be sick at all the affection.
The two love birds hugged and erm....kissed and Erik was on his way.
'WAIT!' cried Ashley.'Take my milkshake as a memoir of me' he cried.
'Ash babes i'm gonna be back in two days' said Erik still taking the milkshake,anything that had had Ashleys lips on was welcome with him anywhere. He ran off to board his plane and the guys returned home.
When they got home, they found Lou and Jay (their publicist) sitting in the front room waiting for them.
'Hey guys' smiled Jay ' Hey Dan'.
'Hi Jay!' shouted Dan with all the enthusiasm possible and ran over to give him a hug.
'Dan, calm it!' said Jay sternly, but Jacob noticed him wink on the sly.
'Hey Lou whats up?'asked Trevor, noticing Lous fly was down. He gave him the 'hey man do up your zipper before we all throw up' look.
Lou quickly ,well slowly , have you seen the size of him?, pulled his zip half way up and gave up as he was sweating tremendously.
'Hey dudes' he laughed with that o so annoying laugh of his, its more like a grunt.'We just came round to tell you that its going to be raining later'
'Yeah' said Jay ' so any photogrophers that happen to come round looking for pics of you guys in the wet, well when i say jump i need you to jump Trevor ok!'
'yeah sure Jay quit looking at me like that!'
Lou called for the airforce and told them to lift him out of the house.
'Hey guys!' shouted Ashley, 'how do i make a sausage pie?'
'Well Ash its simple,you just take the sausages and you squeeze out all of the meat,actually i'll do it for you' said Dan, he loved the thought of holding something round and long. Occasionally his trousers would twitch but everyone was used to it by now.
'Hey Jacob what you upto?'asked Trevor looking at Jacobs brand new hat.It really brought out the colour in his nailvarnish.
'well Trevor im flying a kite, you idiot! what does it look like im doing!! well!!!' screamed Jacob
'Geez Jake calm down' said Trevor trying to look like it hadnt bothered him,when really he was being torn inside at the thought of Jacob not liking him.What if he got thrown out of the group? oh no this was a time for the only thing that could ensure he would stay in o-town.
'Hey Jake, i got you a new vest,its like your ones with the skull on the front, you know the one you have 70 of cos you wear it all the time(dunno if anyone else has noticed this).'
'Wow Trevor thankyou so much!' he cried forgetting all about his bongos and running off to try it on'
Trevor was so happy that he went off to check the lighting in the bathroom. It was just Dan in the kitchen,Ashley watching Bullseye and Jay sat writing in his journal.
'ONE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY!' shouty Erik getting far too excited.
Jay wandered over into the kitchen and began whispering to Dan.
'Hey baby, i saw you playing with those sausages and it really turned me on' he smiled.
'Jay not infront of Ashley!' said Dan
'I cant help it, Ilove you Dan Miller,ever since I found out you had your own black socks youve been my favourite'
'Hey Dan, is my pie ready?!' shouted Ashley.
'Yeah its done!' shouted Dan back.
'Jay, I love you too'
'Good, I want you to elope with me'
'really? I thought you'd never ask!' The two ran off hand in hand and lived happily ever after in Italy, the land of the pizza.
Erik returned after two days and was really impressed by Ashleys sausage...and his pie. Jacob decided that they should recruit Lou as the other member, so the other three ditched him and carried on as a trio singin songs by eternal.
~~~~The End~~~~~© Beccy.T 2001/2002

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