She-Man



‘Really? wow I always thought he was a little strange you know’ said Ashley sipping his tea
‘Yeah I know’ replied Erik,
‘who would have thought that Ikaika was really a woman?’
‘Ikaika?I was talking about Dan’
‘Oh! Geez i wish you hadn't told me! now things are gonna be weird between us’ sighed Ashley
‘Sorry hun, I just thought you should know. Where did you get Ikaika from anyway? I mean erm..er....are we going to Ikea later?’ Erik quickly changed the subject when Jacob entered the room. He knew Jacob hated the I word.Everytime he heard it he would go crazy and shave someone, poor Trevor. He didn't’ mean to say it, and now he was trapped in his room like a bald monkey.
‘Hey guys’ smiled Jake ‘ pour me a glass of that delicious beverage now you peasant’ he growled and pointed to the jug of peach squash on the table.
‘Sure Jacob King of everything’ mumbled Erik as he poured him some. ‘So what are you two up to today?’ he asked
‘We were gonna go down to the beach. but then it started raining so I think I’m just gonna have a shower and then maybe watch TV later if I have time. There's a Bugs Bunny marathon that I really wanna catch but you know how showers are these days. Plus I bought a few hundred new hair gels to try out there's this really cool green one which looks interesting and....’ he stopped when he noticed the other two starring intently at him ‘what?’ he asked
‘Do you ever shut up?’ asked Jacob as he wrapped his lips around the glass and downed the peach juice in one.
Erik watched until he was nearly sick , then he ran away to get dressed.A few hours later and Ashley was happily showering with Tim....the camera man. Jacob was in his room sharpening his razors for the next time someone mentioned Ikaika, Trevor was still crying and still bald and Erik was watching TV. Dan had been in his room all day. No-one knew what he was doing. No-one actually cared but anyway. Suddenly his door flew open and he emerged fully clad in a long green satin dress and a pair of fishnet tights. His hair was long and flowing behind him as he walked... well tried to walk in his stiletto's.
‘Hey dude’ said Erik, no bothering to look up for fear of vomiting.
‘So.....?’ asked Dan with an astonishingly big smile
‘So what?’
‘How do I look?’
‘Oh yeah man, great’
‘Erik you haven't looked at me’ laughed Dan
‘I don't want to’ replied Erik
‘Why not?’ asked Dan looking hurt
‘Because I don't fancy puking at this moment’
‘Oh...ok’
‘Look Dan, I know I said I was cool with the whole you being a woman thing but I just don't like looking at you’
‘Ok I understand. Anyway Bart will be here in a minute for our date’ ‘Bart?’
‘Yeah....Bart Simpson’
‘Bart Simpson? The cartoon character’ Erik was puzzled
‘No silly...he’s just called Bart Simpson...Like the real Bart Simpson would ever date me’ he laughed
‘And the scariest part about that is you’re actually serious’ said Erik turning back to the TV.
Ashley casually walked out of the bathroom in only a small towel and shouted bye to Tim. He saw Erik watching Casualty but turned to see a beautiful brunette in a clingy green dress. He decided to make his move
‘Well hello there beautiful, can I help you at all?’ he asked, giving his best smile
‘No thanks Ash I was just leaving’ said Dan
‘Leaving? You know my name.... have you been watching Making the Band?’
‘No Ashley It’s Dan’
‘Dan? Danielle? What a beautiful name...so have you watched my shower scenes?’
‘Yeah I have actually ..I mean no..no i haven't and Ashley it’s me Dan. Erik tell him’
‘Tell me what baby? That you want me? Do you wanna go see my room?’
‘Erm...Ash....it’s Dan...as in our band mate Dan. You know. ....she-man’ said Erik, holding in his laughter
‘Dan.......Oh my god! argh! I hit on a guy. Jesus man, you seriously do look like a woman though....actually you look kinda like Shelli’
‘Really? Thanks...well anyway Bart’s here so I gotta go. Don’t wait up guys’ he said and in a flick of his hair he was gone.
‘I knew it was Dan all along’ said Ashley nervously walking off to his bedroom.
‘Course you did Ash’ laughed Erik.
So that concludes our story. Dan and Bart are happily dating, Ashley is still coming to terms with the fact that he hit on a guy, Erik is still watching TV, Jacob...well he’s as overpowering as ever and Trevor has grown just enough hair back to fit in his hot hair rollers.....only its not on his head.
~~~~The End~~~~~© Beccy.T 2001/2002

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