Chris: Umm…You guys? Have you noticed something different about the band?
Lance: We’re better than the Backstreet Boys, that’s for sure.
Joey: Yup, that whole thing with Nick and A.J. sealed the deal. Thank god nobody paid much attention to the fact that I have an illegitimate child out of wedlock.
Lance: Joey, we all have illegitimate children out of wedlock. I have 2. Chris has 4. JC has 10. And Justin has like 30.
Chris: Yup. Tomorrow is Christopher Jr’s birthday. He’s five.
Lance: But that doesn’t mean we love them any less. We just can’t be seen with them for fear of the public eye.
Chris: No, you guys. Not about the band in general. Mostly more about JC and Justin.
Lance: Justin’s new hair?
Chris: No.
Joey: JC’s mysterious break up with Bobzilla?
Chris: Well…no…
Lance: Why Justin hasn’t been returning Britney’s calls?
Chris: Sort of…
Joey: Why JC’s such a spazz?
Chris: We’re talking about the group, not the mystery of life…
Lance: Oh, you mean why JC’s obviously flamboyant to Justin and Justin’s obvious ambiguousness to JC’s flamboyantness?
Chris: Yeah!
Lance: Eh, must be your imagination.
A hotel, somewhere in New York…
Justin: It’s the good lick, lollipop! Gonna get me some from the JC shop!
JC: I love it when you sing, honey.
Justin: I also love it when you sing, baby. Especially when you hit those high notes in 'Pop'. I just want to throw you down and do the nasty right there.
JC: Really, sweetie?
Justin: Of course! With that tight ass and the ability to suck like a hoover for hours, who wouldn’t want to hear you sing?
JC: Aww, you’re making me blush. Thank you!
Justin: You’re ever so welcome, C.
JC: I have my baby here with me, the guys are totally clueless, god help their idiotic souls, and Bobbee is rotting in her own J-14 filth somewhere. I’m in such a good mood!
Justin: In a good mood to make-out?
JC: Possibly! Maybe even for something else, if you know what I’m getting to. Break out the lube, the whips, the chains, and the condoms. You’re not going to be able to walk for weeks, baby.
Justin: Like I was saying, it’s the good lick, lollipop! Gonna get S&M from JC shop…
Back at the Nsync compound…
Lance: Yup…Nothing but your imagination.
Chris: You’re right! It’s not like they’re gay or something like that…That’s impossible!