Alanna returned to her room when Rebekah got back from the party a couple of hours later. She'd received a questioning look from Rebekah but she couldn't tell her. It had been hard enough to tell Ashlyn, her best friend of 10 years. Rebekah had been a good friend to her but she'd only known her a few months. She knew she could trust her but she didn't particularly want a lot of people to know. It was a private thing.
Sitting down on her bed she saw the diary. She had thrown it at JC. She wondered how it had got on the bed. Alanna suddenly had a sinking feeling. JC must have returned to the room with Justin. She would have liked to have thought that JC would respect her privacy but she couldn't do that. She knew there was a big possibility that he could have read it especially after earlier on. She didn't know what she'd been thinking when she threw it at him. She hadn't particularly wanted to hurt him physically. In a way she had been throwing all her feelings back at him. It was too late to worry now though.
~*~
JC wasn't having the best day. He'd woken up to a pounding headache and that had just been the start of what was to come. When Johnny had seen his face he'd gone crazy demanding to know what had happened. He had kept Alanna out of it, only saying he'd had a disagreement with somebody. He had been pressed for a name but he'd refused. The cut on his face now had a nice bruise to accompany it.
Chris, Joey and Lance had also wanted to know what had happened. He felt terrible about not telling his closest friends but after reading Alanna's diary he knew he'd caused her enough distress. She would not appreciate anyone else knowing. He'd told Justin; but then again he hadn't had much choice. If Alanna had told Ashlyn, who knows what kind of things Ashlyn would pass on to Justin. She was of course Alanna's best friend and he wouldn't be her favourite person right now.
So far he hadn't bumped into Alanna. He knew it wouldn't be long until he did though. Although they had a large crew they pretty much bumped into everyone on a daily basis.
He had spent a large portion of the night thinking about what could have been. If he had just stayed that night maybe it could have developed into something. Although he hadn't known her that long he felt a connection with her. He could laugh with her, have serious talks with her and lately he'd discovered his need to protect her. Perhaps someone should have protected her from him.
Throughout the day they had been scheduled to do various interviews. Johnny hadn't allowed him to attend them though, not wanting reporters to question him on how he obtained his injury. Instead Johnny had made up an excuse about JC working with some songwriters. In actual fact he had spent the day at the hotel giving phone interviews to overseas magazines. Johnny had lined them up as a suitable punishment he assumed.
They had a show that night and everyone was hoping that make-up would be able to cover up the evidence of the fight. The cut wasn't too bad now, it was just the ugly purple bruise that was sending everyone into a panic. JC frankly didn't care. He knew he had done the right thing last night, any decent guy would have done the same.
There was a knock at the door followed by someone announcing that he needed to head over to the venue. He grabbed what he needed before placing a cap on his head and leaving the room.
A van was waiting for him around the back of the hotel. The area was fenced off preventing fans from getting anywhere near the hotel. Johnny was happy with that. He was intent on keeping him away from all media and fans today.
He stepped into the van and much to his surprise Alanna was there along with her dancers and Alex. JC's bodyguard followed him in. "Oh yeah I forgot to tell you, we're riding with them today. The guys have the other van, they're meeting us there."
"Fine."
He glanced across at Alanna; she was looking out of the window. He caught Ashlyn's eye and she shot him a death stare. Obviously she had been told.
JC sighed and turned to look out of the window himself. It was going to be a long ride.
~*~
"The things you boys put me through." The make-up artist was busy caking JC's face in make-up in order to hide the bruise. He'd been there a while but he had to admit that she'd done a good job. Unless you were close the bruise was not visible. Fortunately tonight there was no meet and greet.
"Thanks," JC said as he hopped off the chair.
He headed back to his dressing room, getting a few curious glances on the way. He knew everyone around him was talking about him and what he'd been up to. Who knew what kind of conclusions they'd all come up with. They weren't going to find out anything from JC though.
"JC?"
He turned to see Justin. "Yeah?"
"Have you talked to Alanna yet?"
"No. I think she wants to forget about it Justin. I tried to apologise last night but she didn't want to listen."
"You've got to do something!"
"Like what?"
"I don't know."
"Well when you figure it out come back and tell me."
"JC don't get an attitude with me. It's not my fault, you got yourself into this mess."
"You think I don't know that already? You think I don't want to turn back the clock?"
"You wouldn't have slept with her?"
"Did I say that?" he shouted.
"No. What did you mean then?"
"I would have stayed."
"So you DO like her?"
JC shook his head in frustration. "YES Justin. Are you happy now? It's not like it matters now anyway. I blew it, she deserves better."
"You could try talking to her about how you REALLY feel. Maybe she'd forgive you,” Justin suggested.
"Justin quit trying to make me feel better. She hates me and there's nothing I can do to change that now. The damage has already been done,” he sighed in defeat.
"Hey guys what's going on?" Chris asked, walking into the dressing room.
"Nothing," replied JC before he turned and walked away.
"What's wrong with him?"
"He's feeling sorry for himself, that's what he's doing."
~*~
"Hey Lance, what's up?" asked Alanna.
Lance smiled. "I've got some news for you."
She looked at him quizzically. Like what?"
"When the tour is over you're going to be making a video. We're going to stay in California once the tour is finished and we'll do it there."
Her eyes widened in shock. "I'm WHAT?"
Lance laughed. "You're making your first video. We're going to release your song to radio and hopefully people will like it and they're going to want to put a face to the voice."
Alanna was stunned. She took a seat. "Wow."
"It's a crazy thought isn't it. I felt exactly the same the first video we made."
"So where am I going to do the video?"
"LA. We have some time off so I'll be there. You don't need to worry about anything okay?"
"Yeah."
"Alanna relax, we'll discuss this more nearer the time."
"Okay. Lance thanks. This is all still really weird to me. I still feel like the same person, somehow I thought I'd feel different."
"Don't worry, you're not crazy. I'm still the same person, it's just everyone else that perceives you as being a star. It's sometimes like they think we're not real.” Lance shrugged. “You get used to it."
"I don't think I could ever handle the fame that you guys have. Lucky I don't need to worry about it."
"Hey you never know. Well I'll see you later okay?"
"Yeah," she replied distractedly.
Lance shook his head in amusement and left the room.
When she heard the door shut she whispered to herself, "I'm making a video. I'm really making a video."
She screamed in excitement. The door flew open. "Alanna what's wrong?" Ashlyn asked worriedly.
Alanna swung around and grabbed Ashlyn's hand and jumped up and down. "I'm making a video," she shouted.
The same shock registered on Ashlyn's face before she began jumping with Alanna. "You're making a video, you're making a video."
"What the hell is going on in here?"
The two girls turned to see Justin looking at them strangely. "I'm making a video," Alanna screamed. "She's making a video," Ashlyn screamed at the same time. The two girls burst out laughing.
"Okaay," Justin said looking at them like they'd cracked up.
Chapter 23
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