She’d lied through her teeth to her mom. For that she felt bad. In her opinion she’d had no choice though. If she’d said she was in LA Alanna would know in next to no time. She at least wanted to get settled before the news got back to her. It was scary being out on her own and she knew if Alanna found her now and asked her to come back she’d probably go. It was the easy way out but she didn’t want that.
Ashlyn just hoped that Alanna wouldn’t go to the extreme and go to Mexico to try and find her. She didn’t want to lead her on a wild goose chase, she just needed a couple of weeks on her own.
The motel she was staying at was okay. It wasn’t a palace but what could she expect? She’d worked out she could probably stay there for 2 weeks with what she had but that would leave her with little else for things like food.
So she needed a job, that’s why she was there – outside ‘On The Rocks’ bar. That’s what people did in the movies right? The person moved to a new town or city and ended up pulling pints behind a bar. In most people’s case they were usually looking for what she had had before but Ashlyn was never one to go about things in the normal way. The fact that there was a ‘help wanted’ notice in the window of the first bar she passed seemed like a sign to her.
She wove her way through the packed room towards the bar, where she wedged herself between two men, glaring at one as he spilt his beer over her shoe. “Watch it buddy,” she called as he disappeared back into the crowd.
She turned back to the bar with a sigh. Money and drinks were flying back and forth and she knew if she ended up working there she’d be run off her feet.
“Can I help you?”
Ashlyn looked up at the young woman in front of her. It was now or never. She scanned the bottles behind her. “Let me see…I’ll have a job please,” she said, flashing a hopeful smile.
The woman looked at her for a second before she burst out laughing. “Would you like that in a bottle or a glass?” she shot back.
Ashlyn smiled back. “So how about it?”
She cringed at the sound of glass shattering. “You actually want to work here?”
Ashlyn shrugged. “It’s not about wanting to, it’s about needing to.”
She nodded. “You need the money huh? Well don’t I know that all too well.” She cast a look around her and shrugged. “You’ll have to ask the manager. Have you got any experience?”
Ashlyn bit her lip and smiled sheepishly. “I’ve got plenty of experience this side of the bar.”
She chuckled. “I like you, I’ll put in a good word. What’s your name?” she asked.
“Ashlyn.”
“Well Ashlyn it’s nice to meet you, I’m Christy.”
“Hey Jack,” she called to a slightly built man, with greying hair, further down the bar. “We’ve got another candidate for the crazy crew!”
Ashlyn smiled at the man. Perhaps things might work out after all.
Alanna was curled up in bed. It was 4 am, just an hour off her wake-up call for a breakfast interview at a radio show in Koln, Germany. It was yet another last minute addition to her schedule.
Although keeping busy would no doubt keep her mind off things, she was exhausted. Lance and JC had been calling her throughout the previous evening. Finally fed up with the incessant ringing, she had turned the cell phone off. She’d hoped for a bit of sleep but had been unable to manage anything other than short naps.
She was quickly discovering the downside to fame - - well she didn’t even have that really.
After the initial hype following the ‘NSYNC tour everything had quietened down. Her single had been released to radio but over the Christmas period when artists were releasing Christmas albums, hyping their CD’s for the increase in sales over the period, and all the television shows wanting the big stars, it was hard to keep the interest up.
Of course her connection to ‘NSYNC had helped put her in the teen magazines but MTV and the like had been harder to convince with the sheer number of female artists running around at the time. What made her different? What made her special? Well in all reality there wasn’t anything. She was trying to do exactly the same as them, trying to get to the top of the charts. She was just herself and people were going to have to like her or leave her.
All of this had resulted in the record company sending her to Europe. It had been proven time and time before that getting a name for yourself over in Europe would make the US sit up and take notice. It had happened with ‘NSYNC themselves.
JC had told her what a good opportunity it was. Sometimes she wished he’d be less practical and act more like a boyfriend, tell her he didn’t want her to go or something.
Their relationship had been anything but normal. They’d jumped in at the deep end in the beginning and by the time they had talked everything out and had decided to give things a go it had all been very strange. Both of them had been extremely cautious and it had been some time before they were themselves around each other.
At times it seemed as if all they had was a relationship over the phone. JC had been busy working on the new ‘NSYNC album and Alanna had gone over to Europe at the beginning of February. Other than a brief meeting in Sweden they hadn’t seen each other in close to 6 weeks. Separation wasn’t the best basis to form a relationship on.
They had slowly grown closer over the months though, taking time to get to know each other. There was no rushing into things this time around. Their lack of communication had been their downfall back then and she was determined not to make the same mistake again.
Ashlyn had taken her mind off missing JC and her family time and time again. She’d been a constant form of support since day one. Alanna now realised that she hadn’t once asked Ashlyn how she was coping. Just because she wasn’t the ‘star’ didn’t mean she didn’t feel the pressure.
She had gone over and over every little detail from the last few days, what could have caused her to run off like that. Was something really wrong?
They’d had an argument, a slight disagreement was all really. They’d argued in the past, they’d got past it.
“Stop feeling sorry for yourself,” she muttered.
She picked up her cell phone and selected Ashlyn’s number. The voice mail came on just as she has expected. She took a deep breath before speaking. “Ash, it’s me…again,” she laughed weakly. “I won’t keep calling, you obviously don’t want to talk to me right now,” she said sadly. “Just…look after yourself okay? Bye,” she whispered before hanging up.
**The next day**
“You think you’ve got everything?” Jack asked.
Ashlyn looked around her apprehensively. She had so much to remember and she started her first night of work in less than 30 minutes. “I think so.”
“You’ll do fine,” he assured her before going to change the barrels ready for that night.
“So are you ready?” a voice chirped from behind her.
She grinned at Christy. “Yeah but I don’t think I’ve quite got the hang of pulling a beer yet. The customers are going to get a glass of foam.”
Christy laughed. “You’ll get the hang of it in no time. Come sit down.” She motioned for her to take a seat at the bar. “Trust me, you’ll need every bit of energy once we open, your feet will be killing you tomorrow.”
Ashlyn thought back to the ‘NSYNC tour. 20 minutes of dancing a night seemed like a distant fairytale now. She was going to have to get used to the long shifts at the bar.
“So where are you from?” Christy asked.
“Florida…Orlando.”
Christy raised her eyebrows slightly. “A long way from home,” she commented. “So why are you here then? Hollywood?” she asked.
Ashlyn laughed. “No. Just trying something new I guess. What about you?”
“Why am I here? As in LA or working here?”
Ashlyn shrugged. “Both I guess.”
“Okay. LA – I grew up here. As for why I’m working here, well I have a 2 year old that demands food and food costs money.”
“You have a kid?” she asked in surprise.
Christy grinned. “Yeah, a son, Sean.”
“Wow.”
Christy laughed. “You weren’t expecting that huh? I was 22 when I had him.”
Ashlyn shook her head. That was just a year older than herself. “I can barely look after myself let alone another human being.”
“Yeah well I wouldn’t be without him, he’s a cutie.”
Christy’s grin was infectious and Ashlyn couldn’t help but smile back at her. Christy had so much to think about other than herself and Ashlyn couldn’t help but think she was being selfish. Alanna was probably going crazy, her parents were in the dark about everything, she’d walked out on her job, all so she could, when it came down to it, have a bit of fun. She was beginning to feel guilty.
“So where is he now?” she asked.
“At my mom’s. His father fled the scene so to speak.” Ashlyn nodded, her unspoken question answered.
“I hate having to drag him from my parents house back to the apartment but it’s all for him. I get to spend time with him in the day which is important to me.”
“You must be so tired.”
Christy laughed. “You better believe it. Once he goes to school I’m gonna go back and finish up college but for now we’re doing good.”
“Well I really admire you,” Ashlyn said sincerely. Her own problems were being put into perspective now.
“Girls time get this show on the road,” Jack called.
Ashlyn turned to look at him. Where had she heard that before?
“You ready?”
She turned back to Christy and smoothed her required uniform of a black shirt and skirt down. “As ever,” she sighed.
Ashlyn got back to the motel at 3 am, tired and ready for bed. Her talk with Christy that night had got her thinking and when she had turned on her phone for the first time that day and had heard the message from Alanna the guilt had just doubled.
Without a second thought she had returned the call, reaching Alanna’s voicemail. “Al, it’s not your fault, don’t beat yourself up over this. I’m okay, I promise. I bet Lance and JC are freaking right? It might be kinda awkward…your boyfriend and manager hating your best friend. You are still my best friend.” She paused before speaking again. “I just hope after this I’ll still be yours,” she said sadly. “Anyway I gotta go, I’ll be in touch. Bye.”
She hung up the phone, the invisible weight that had been crushing her chest, lifted slightly. Maybe distancing herself from those close to her wasn’t the way to go after all.
Chapter 3
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